‘So how did it go?’ Callum asks again as we sit down in the living room.

I shake my head. I knew I was going to be speaking to Callum about what happened soon anyway, but I didn’t think it was going to be the moment I got back. I thought I would at least have some time to gather my thoughts. ‘To be honest, I’m not sure. He didn’t really tell me anything. And then I sort of . . . I sort of lost it with him, and ended up being pulled off him by the guards,' I say. 

Callum raises his eyebrow. ‘To be honest I wouldn’t have blamed you for doing that, he’s a piece of shit; I would’ve struggled to keep my hands off him. I thought the whole business of you going to see him, was for him to tell you what happened at last.’  

‘I know, but God, it was weird. I . . . I asked him if he had any remorse at all for what he did to my parents, and he said no. Can you believe it?’

‘The little shit.’

I let out a slight laugh. ‘He’s hardly little anymore. He’s really beefed up actually, during the years he’s been in prison; he’d give your mate, Rob a run for his money. But . . . I did get some information out of him. Turns out my parents, and this man, Jeremiah were all living together at this address in Essex; Harvey told me to go there and said that that’s where I would find the answers I’m looking for. Actually, I just remembered I haven’t shown you the photo Jeremiah gave me the night of my party.’

I get up from the sofa and hurry over to where my laptop is still sitting on the table where I left it earlier. The photograph is lying next to my computer. I’ve been keeping it in my room, to make sure Mum and Dad don’t stumble across it by accident, but I was looking at it earlier in here, before Jeremiah picked me up. I pick it up and show it to Callum, he takes it from me.

‘So these are the people who you want to go and see?’ he asks, glancing back up at me.

‘Jeremiah says they’re all still there at the same place. I’d like to . . . I’d like to at least find out what my life was like there. Jeremiah says it has to be my choice to do this, no one else’s.’ I sit beside Callum and run my tongue around the inside of my mouth.  ‘Will you come with me if I decide to go?’ He’s not going to want to. He’s going to say there’s no way I should be doing this.

Callum nods, I breathe a sigh of releif. ‘What about your parents?' he asks, frowning. 'What are you going to say to them? I can’t imagine they’ll be pleased with the idea of you going to this place.’

I try to think. God, the thought of telling Mum fills me with dread. I think her and dad have always hoped that with each passing year, that Harvey continued to refuse to see me, that I might lose interest in wanting to talk to him, and instead that I might choose to move on and live my life. But that was never on the agenda for me. ‘We can . . . if you can come, we can say we’re going for a weekend away somewhere, or a day trip, sort of.’ I try and think of how my parent's will react, Mum and Dad will probably encourage me to go, if they think me and Callum are planning on spending some time away together. 

‘A weekend away, you’re not seriously thinking about staying at this place, are you?’ he says, disbelief etched in his voice.

‘I don’t know. It depends what I feel like when I get there, but I doubt it, they might not even have space for us to stay anyway.’

Silence stretches out between us; Callum sighs. ‘OK, I’ll come with you. When were you thinking?’

My leg jitters up and down. ‘Tomorrow, would that be OK?’

‘Tomorrow?’ Callum replies, puffing out his cheeks.

‘If we do it tomorrow, then that’ll give me less time to think about it and chicken out. It’s Saturday tomorrow so we don’t have to think about taking any time off work. Please, Callum.’

He nods. ‘OK, sure, but prepare for lots of questions from your Mum and Dad if we suddenly spring this on them. They’ll want to know what we’re doing.’

‘I know. Don’t worry, I’ll sort it.’

Callum hands the photograph back to me and I stare at the faces standing behind me and my family in the picture. My eyes fix on Oliver’s. There’s something about him that keeps drawing me in, it’s the way he’s looking at the camera, as though he’s looking at me directly from the past, enticing me. I shiver. Mum would call it some sort of mystic force, she’s always been into all that supernatural stuff; she goes to see psychics with her friends every now and again. She comes back and tells me and Dad about all the amazing stuff the psychic said, and we both just look at each other and know whoever she saw had just been phishing for information, like they all do.  

‘Well, if you’re OK, think I’ll head off,’ Callum says, getting up from the sofa.

‘Thanks for coming round.’ I give him a hug.

‘No problem. Wish me luck with speaking to my Mum tonight, y’know what she’s like,’ he says, rolling his eyes. ‘You don’t fancy coming to football tonight then?’

I shake my head. ‘I think I just want to have a quiet night in,’ I say. ‘Have a drink for me though when you go out after.’

‘Think I’ll need a couple of beers before I speak to Mum later. You sure you don’t want to come out tonight, it might do you some good to let your hair down everyone will be there.’

‘No, no, honestly, Callum, I’m fine.’

I show him out. Now I’ve got to think of what to say to my parents this evening so they don’t get suspicious.