| General Fiction posted April 23, 2024 |
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Where do they go?
Rocking Retirement
by jmdg1954
“Ian. Don’t be a putz. Us, Led Zeppelin. We were the greatest rock band of all time,” said Jimmy Paige, legendary guitarist. “We wrote, ‘Stairway to Heaven’. Top that, dipstick. All you did was blow into the little piccolo of yours and jump around the stage. You call yourself a musician?”
“It was a flute! Not a piccolo. Who you calling putz, you schmuck!” replied Ian Anderson. “Your heads as 'Thick as a Brick'. I’ll take my cane and shov…”
“Gentlemen, gentlemen, 'It’s so Easy' to calm down,” chimed in Nurse Ronstadt. “Behave yourselves before I take away your jello cups”
“Did this 'Foxy Lady' say Jell-O shots?” shouted Jimi Hendrix. “I can do me some of them, specially those 'Purple Haze' ones!”
“Hey Jimi, when’d you get here? Slap me five bro. 'Oye Como Va'. I ain’t seen you since Woodstock! Man that was a freakin good concert. We were rockin’ it out. 'Evil Ways' in all that rain and mud. Awesommme!”
“Carlos? Dat you? Carlos Santana! Man, I thought you died? Hah. You got a 'Black Magic Woman' for good old Jimi here, hehehe.”
“Ha. 'She Came In Through The Bathroom Window'. What’re you going to do with a woman at your age, Jimi? 'With A Little Help From My Friends', can you even find it?” crackled Joe Cocker.
“Boys! That’s enough! You’ll give yourselves a damn heart attack. Now calm down,” yelled Joan Baez from behind her walker. “You all know 'My Generation' by The Who took the house down. Oh that Peter Townsend still makes me wet.”
"Oh gross. Stop that, you 'Sweet Leaf, Hellraiser',” shouted Ozzie Osbourne. “The only thing wet on you is your hair when Nurse Blonde washes it, 'One Way or Another'. Choo-choo. Hop aboard the 'Crazy Train', ha ha ha haaaa.”
“'Oh, Baby, I Love Your Way',” said Peter Frampton, “but you dorks know, I’m the only musician to get my guitar to talk, don’t you? 'Do You Feel like We Do?'"
“'You Can't Always Get What You Want', Peter,” said Mick Jagger. "Being on top is a 'Beast of Burden' ... and I should know.”
That my friends is a typical day of conversation in the game room over at Casa Verdi, a bustling sanctuary for retired musicians. Built by Italian composer Giuseppe Verdi in the late 1800s, it has hosted 1,500 residents and became an exclusive retirement home for elderly musicians.
Hmmm. If they started a band and called it, ‘The Old Farts’, I wonder if they could rock till they drop?
“Ian. Don’t be a putz. Us, Led Zeppelin. We were the greatest rock band of all time,” said Jimmy Paige, legendary guitarist. “We wrote, ‘Stairway to Heaven’. Top that, dipstick. All you did was blow into the little piccolo of yours and jump around the stage. You call yourself a musician?”
“It was a flute! Not a piccolo. Who you calling putz, you schmuck!” replied Ian Anderson. “Your heads as 'Thick as a Brick'. I’ll take my cane and shov…”
“Gentlemen, gentlemen, 'It’s so Easy' to calm down,” chimed in Nurse Ronstadt. “Behave yourselves before I take away your jello cups”
“Did this 'Foxy Lady' say Jell-O shots?” shouted Jimi Hendrix. “I can do me some of them, specially those 'Purple Haze' ones!”
“Hey Jimi, when’d you get here? Slap me five bro. 'Oye Como Va'. I ain’t seen you since Woodstock! Man that was a freakin good concert. We were rockin’ it out. 'Evil Ways' in all that rain and mud. Awesommme!”
“Carlos? Dat you? Carlos Santana! Man, I thought you died? Hah. You got a 'Black Magic Woman' for good old Jimi here, hehehe.”
“Ha. 'She Came In Through The Bathroom Window'. What’re you going to do with a woman at your age, Jimi? 'With A Little Help From My Friends', can you even find it?” crackled Joe Cocker.
“Boys! That’s enough! You’ll give yourselves a damn heart attack. Now calm down,” yelled Joan Baez from behind her walker. “You all know 'My Generation' by The Who took the house down. Oh that Peter Townsend still makes me wet.”
"Oh gross. Stop that, you 'Sweet Leaf, Hellraiser',” shouted Ozzie Osbourne. “The only thing wet on you is your hair when Nurse Blonde washes it, 'One Way or Another'. Choo-choo. Hop aboard the 'Crazy Train', ha ha ha haaaa.”
“'Oh, Baby, I Love Your Way',” said Peter Frampton, “but you dorks know, I’m the only musician to get my guitar to talk, don’t you? 'Do You Feel like We Do?'"
“'You Can't Always Get What You Want', Peter,” said Mick Jagger. "Being on top is a 'Beast of Burden' ... and I should know.”
That my friends is a typical day of conversation in the game room over at Casa Verdi, a bustling sanctuary for retired musicians. Built by Italian composer Giuseppe Verdi in the late 1800s, it has hosted 1,500 residents and became an exclusive retirement home for elderly musicians.
Hmmm. If they started a band and called it, ‘The Old Farts’, I wonder if they could rock till they drop?
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