| General Non-Fiction posted March 27, 2024 |
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My uncle's search for the perfect man
The Story of Cowboy Tom
by Violet WolfChild
Single is often synonymous with my name. The feeling was almost unbearable between 2015 and 2017. Whenever I turned around, someone was joking about me being single or looking for potential partners. I worked at our local library from July 2015 to May 2016, and the progress of finding me a man often came up during staff meetings. The girls there had their eyes on a FedEx driver from down south and a History teacher they didn't know was my cousin. And the girls at the Diner I returned to in 2016 had their eyes on a cook we worked with. Let's call him Rico, who had become a good friend.
I found their efforts amusing but also wasted on me. My reasons for staying single were more profound than even I was aware of at the time.
But, one night, right around my 25th birthday, my mother came home from bingo and told me that my 80+ year-old Uncle had shared some news with her...I was about to get married. Being very much single, I was surprised by this news as well.
My Uncle came into the Diner almost every morning. So the next time I saw him, I asked him about this engagement, which I knew nothing about. He laughed and assured me it was just casino talk, and he was trying to see how far it would travel. He told me that I should keep it going.
So, for the next few weeks, it became our joke. Every morning, he'd come in for breakfast, and I'd ask him how the search for my future husband was going. He'd always respond that he was on the lookout, and I would tease him about trying to marry me off. He smiled and said, "Just wait, I'll find you the perfect guy."
On June 2nd, 2016, he entered the Diner and announced he'd done it. He'd found one. He'd found me a cowboy—a bull rider. I laughed and told him he might have better luck setting him up with my younger sister. Again, he responded, "Just wait, my girl, I will find you someone." I told him, "Okay, Uncle, I'll believe it when I see him. You find him, and I promise I will at least meet him."
Two days later, my Uncle returned and came straight to the counter. He said, "If you have a minute, I found you a cowboy waiting in the car. I'll go get him and bring him in." Then he turned and walked back towards the door. I froze. I'd never taken his joking seriously. I hadn't expected him to look for a man for me. I waited nervously, watching the door. The waitress beside me could barely contain her excitement. She'd been listening and couldn't wait to glimpse the cowboy.
Moments passed. Then my Uncle re-entered the building with the biggest smile on his face. In his hands was a 2ft statue of a cowboy. He sat him on the counter before me and said "This is Cowboy Tom. You can let everyone know the search is over. I've found you the perfect man. He's quiet, so he won't argue, he doesn't take up much space, and you won't have to clean up after him." I smiled so hard that day my face twitched.
We hired a new girl at the Diner a couple of weeks later. Rico caught her eye, and she spent most of her 1st shift trying to get his attention. The next time I saw her, she apologized. One of the girls had told her about me and Rico. I told her the apology was unnecessary there was no me and Rico. He had a girlfriend who happened to be a friend of mine. For weeks, she continued to flirt with him and try to convince me that we were wrong for each other. It became increasingly annoying. I'd told her he had a girlfriend. He'd told her he had a girlfriend. It was ridiculous.
Then, one day, she saw some poetry scribbles I'd left on the counter and started going on and on about how I had to meet her brother. He'd be perfect for me. Way better than Rico that was. Truly annoyed with the situation and having someone I barely knew talking about my love life, I took my Uncle's advice.
"Thanks, but I'm perfectly happy with my cowboy."
"Wait, you're seeing someone?" she squeaked.
"yeah, my Uncle introduced us." I continued.
"Did you know she was seeing someone?" she asked the other girls out front.
The waitress who'd been by my side when my Uncle brought Tom in spoke up. "Yeah, he's cute too. Looks like Burt Reynolds."
The girl grilled me a bit, trying to get details, and I told her, "His name is Tom. My Uncle introduced us a while back, and that's all you need to know."
My diner crew was like family and I was grateful they spoke of Tom like he was a real person. The new girl even ran back and told Rico he knew who Tom was, too. But he didn't say a word. Of course, she continued to prod. She wondered if I'd leave my cowboy for Rico. I told her again that Rico and I were just friends and was okay with that. This went on for a week or so.
Then, one morning, I walked into the kitchen, and she followed me to the ice bin.
"Hey, I saw your cowboy on Facebook." Crap.Busted.I thought to myself. "You guys are really cute together."
Wait...What?...I thought she'd seen my post about the statue. A picture of us...Who's Tom? I asked myself.
To her, I responded, "Oh really? how'd you come across that?"
Another waitress had shown her. It took me a moment, but there was only one picture of me with a cowboy: a picture of me and my nephew at his wedding. It wasn't the first time someone saw that picture and assumed he was my boyfriend. He knew all about the Cowboy Tom story because we'd been discussing it after work. So I messaged him to give him a heads up in case their paths crossed.
I planned to introduce her to the real Tom when I brought him in to decorate for the town's Rodeo. But the day I planned to come clean, she had an incident in the kitchen and walked out. I never got to tell her that Tom was just a statue.
My Uncle passed away on March 14th, 2024, at 96 years old, and Tom is at the top of my cherished memories. Every time I think of him, I smile. I've had a lot of people poke their noses into my love life or lack of a love life. But my Uncle is the only one ever to deliver. He found me a solution to the "issue" and showed me that it didn't need to be fixed. That he understood and accepted my decision. Cowboy Tom showed me there was nothing wrong with me choosing to be single. Nothing wrong with waiting. Romantic relationships have never been a top priority. I've always kept myself busy. So I am in no rush to get there. Seeing how I've grown over the years and how much I've come to understand, I am glad that I chose the path I did. And I am grateful to have had such a wonderful man in my life.
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Single is often synonymous with my name. The feeling was almost unbearable between 2015 and 2017. Whenever I turned around, someone was joking about me being single or looking for potential partners. I worked at our local library from July 2015 to May 2016, and the progress of finding me a man often came up during staff meetings. The girls there had their eyes on a FedEx driver from down south and a History teacher they didn't know was my cousin. And the girls at the Diner I returned to in 2016 had their eyes on a cook we worked with. Let's call him Rico, who had become a good friend.
I found their efforts amusing but also wasted on me. My reasons for staying single were more profound than even I was aware of at the time.
But, one night, right around my 25th birthday, my mother came home from bingo and told me that my 80+ year-old Uncle had shared some news with her...I was about to get married. Being very much single, I was surprised by this news as well.
My Uncle came into the Diner almost every morning. So the next time I saw him, I asked him about this engagement, which I knew nothing about. He laughed and assured me it was just casino talk, and he was trying to see how far it would travel. He told me that I should keep it going.
So, for the next few weeks, it became our joke. Every morning, he'd come in for breakfast, and I'd ask him how the search for my future husband was going. He'd always respond that he was on the lookout, and I would tease him about trying to marry me off. He smiled and said, "Just wait, I'll find you the perfect guy."
On June 2nd, 2016, he entered the Diner and announced he'd done it. He'd found one. He'd found me a cowboy—a bull rider. I laughed and told him he might have better luck setting him up with my younger sister. Again, he responded, "Just wait, my girl, I will find you someone." I told him, "Okay, Uncle, I'll believe it when I see him. You find him, and I promise I will at least meet him."
Two days later, my Uncle returned and came straight to the counter. He said, "If you have a minute, I found you a cowboy waiting in the car. I'll go get him and bring him in." Then he turned and walked back towards the door. I froze. I'd never taken his joking seriously. I hadn't expected him to look for a man for me. I waited nervously, watching the door. The waitress beside me could barely contain her excitement. She'd been listening and couldn't wait to glimpse the cowboy.
Moments passed. Then my Uncle re-entered the building with the biggest smile on his face. In his hands was a 2ft statue of a cowboy. He sat him on the counter before me and said "This is Cowboy Tom. You can let everyone know the search is over. I've found you the perfect man. He's quiet, so he won't argue, he doesn't take up much space, and you won't have to clean up after him." I smiled so hard that day my face twitched.
We hired a new girl at the Diner a couple of weeks later. Rico caught her eye, and she spent most of her 1st shift trying to get his attention. The next time I saw her, she apologized. One of the girls had told her about me and Rico. I told her the apology was unnecessary there was no me and Rico. He had a girlfriend who happened to be a friend of mine. For weeks, she continued to flirt with him and try to convince me that we were wrong for each other. It became increasingly annoying. I'd told her he had a girlfriend. He'd told her he had a girlfriend. It was ridiculous.
Then, one day, she saw some poetry scribbles I'd left on the counter and started going on and on about how I had to meet her brother. He'd be perfect for me. Way better than Rico that was. Truly annoyed with the situation and having someone I barely knew talking about my love life, I took my Uncle's advice.
"Thanks, but I'm perfectly happy with my cowboy."
"Wait, you're seeing someone?" she squeaked.
"yeah, my Uncle introduced us." I continued.
"Did you know she was seeing someone?" she asked the other girls out front.
The waitress who'd been by my side when my Uncle brought Tom in spoke up. "Yeah, he's cute too. Looks like Burt Reynolds."
The girl grilled me a bit, trying to get details, and I told her, "His name is Tom. My Uncle introduced us a while back, and that's all you need to know."
My diner crew was like family and I was grateful they spoke of Tom like he was a real person. The new girl even ran back and told Rico he knew who Tom was, too. But he didn't say a word. Of course, she continued to prod. She wondered if I'd leave my cowboy for Rico. I told her again that Rico and I were just friends and was okay with that. This went on for a week or so.
Then, one morning, I walked into the kitchen, and she followed me to the ice bin.
"Hey, I saw your cowboy on Facebook." Crap.Busted.I thought to myself. "You guys are really cute together."
Wait...What?...I thought she'd seen my post about the statue. A picture of us...Who's Tom? I asked myself.
To her, I responded, "Oh really? how'd you come across that?"
Another waitress had shown her. It took me a moment, but there was only one picture of me with a cowboy: a picture of me and my nephew at his wedding. It wasn't the first time someone saw that picture and assumed he was my boyfriend. He knew all about the Cowboy Tom story because we'd been discussing it after work. So I messaged him to give him a heads up in case their paths crossed.
I planned to introduce her to the real Tom when I brought him in to decorate for the town's Rodeo. But the day I planned to come clean, she had an incident in the kitchen and walked out. I never got to tell her that Tom was just a statue.
My Uncle passed away on March 14th, 2024, at 96 years old, and Tom is at the top of my cherished memories. Every time I think of him, I smile. I've had a lot of people poke their noses into my love life or lack of a love life. But my Uncle is the only one ever to deliver. He found me a solution to the "issue" and showed me that it didn't need to be fixed. That he understood and accepted my decision. Cowboy Tom showed me there was nothing wrong with me choosing to be single. Nothing wrong with waiting. Romantic relationships have never been a top priority. I've always kept myself busy. So I am in no rush to get there. Seeing how I've grown over the years and how much I've come to understand, I am glad that I chose the path I did. And I am grateful to have had such a wonderful man in my life.
The picture is of the actual cowboy statue I was given by my uncle.
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