General Poetry posted December 8, 2023


Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
The final moments of Daedalus's son, Icarus.

Final Clarity

by Andrew Cloward

My lesson learned is all too late,

as I sink beneath the waves of fate.

I cringe to hear my father’s cry,

his muddled voice- I wherein the water lie.

~

These desires I find within my chest:

more than further breath to be restored-

but that my father'd be at rest,

and that I had not ignored

~

His desperate plea on furrowed brow

I could have listened, I could have heard,

but all of that is too late now-

although with wings, I'm not a bird.

~

My gallant laughs throughout the sky,

oh how fast did I forget-

the love within his paternal sighs,

now, no way for me to repay the debt.

~

As the salt cleanses the last of my breath,

mine body must embrace its death-

all thoughts are closer at this depth,

despite that cragged rift above.

~

I'm harrowed up by the heedless plight,

my foolish mind, so lost in flight-

as my body clenches in one last spite

It knows, agony can't redeem.

~

No yearn for caution could tame the sea,

nor regret for lack thereof to say-

my final clarity will forever be,

lost within these murky waves.




Write Your Best Darn Poem! writing prompt entry
Writing Prompt
I wanted to celebrate winning POM by providing my fellow FanStorians who have yet to win a prize the chance to do so. So write the best darn poem you can. No limitations on subject, style, or length. But please, make it a _poem_. A sentence is not a poem even if broken up into lines. Sayings, aphorisms, maxims, admonishments, advice, and declarative statements are not poems. The poet's tools are many and varied--metaphor, simile, assonance, consonance, etc.--and you are encouraged to use them. Be bold and be brilliant! This is all about craft and imagination--give it your best! As an added bonus I pledge to give the winner an extra $5 member dollars.

NO IMAGES FOR THIS CONTEST PLEASE--LET YOUR WORDS DO ALL THE WORK.


I have always been intrigued by the story of Icarus, who I'd imagine knew all too well the mistake he'd made as he sunk into the sea. Without the context of that story, this poem carries further meaning for children who have been lost from their parents by 'flying too close to the sun.'

Side note, the rhyme scheme changes multiple times- this was intentional, meaning to parallel the chaotic, broken thoughts patterns of a drowning young man trying to prolong his final breath. While the poem overall has a darker tone, I meant to still generate some cathartic sentiments through the acceptance of his fate and acknowledgement of his father's love.
Pays one point and 2 member cents.


Save to Bookcase Promote This Share or Bookmark
Print It View Reviews

You need to login or register to write reviews. It's quick! We only ask four questions to new members.


© Copyright 2024. Andrew Cloward All rights reserved.
Andrew Cloward has granted FanStory.com, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.