Darcy Calls a Meeting

April 2019, Darcy, our four year-old Border Collie-Brittany spaniel mix, summoned a family meeting.

There were some concerns she wanted to clear up. She was the talking-snout for her and Lola, our fourteen year-old English Pointer.

Attending the meeting were, Darcy, Lola, Human Me, Human Mom and our son, Human Mark, Lola’s dad.

Darcy thumped her paw on the living room carpet drawing our attention.

“Hear ye, hear ye, I now call this meeting to order. Lola you gonna take the minutes?”

Darcy waited a few moments before continuing after no response. “Lola. I said you gonna take…”

“She’s asleep you little rug monster,” I interjected. “What’s this meeting about? And make it snappy, puppy, I need to finish mowing the lawn.”

After Darcy pointed out snappy and puppy did not rhyme, she continued.

“Well, Human Mom told me earlier that them two dogs from virgin breach are coming to live with us. It ain’t gonna happen, we got a good thing going on here! Ain’t that right, Lola?”

No response from Lola.

“First of all, Miss Smarty Paws,” I said, “it’s Virginia Beach, not virgin breach. Second of all, we taught you to speak and not use the word ain’t.”

“Okay, okay. Sorry. I ain’t gonna use it again,” she said covering her eyes with her paws. “I crack myself up!”

“Darcy, honey,” Human Mom started, “Aries and Snow are your puppy cousins, and they need a place to live. Uncle Human Rob is moving to Florida and cannot take them.”

“Not really my problem,” mumbled Darcy.

Human Mom continued, “If they don’t come live with us, they’ll get dropped off at an animal shelter.” Darcy kept pawing at the carpet. “After the shelter, maybe they go to a foster home. And most likely, not together. They’ll be separated from each other and that’s sad.”

Darcy suddenly looked sad. “Not together? And in a strange home?”

“Maybe,” said Human Dad. 

“But there won’t be enough dog food for four dogs if they come live with us.”

“Darcy. Is that what you’re worried about, having enough food for all of you?” asked Human Mom.

“Well, yea that and there’ll be less time we spend together, snuggled on the couch watching your game shows on the boob box,” Darcy answered.

“Boob box?”

“Yea, that’s what Human Dad calls the TV.”

“Hmph, I’ll deal with him later. As for now, let’s take a vote and see if we adopt Snow and Aries,” Human Mom said looking at everyone. 

“Dad?”

“It’s a yes for me.”

“Me too,” said Mom. “We can’t ask Lola, she’s still sleeping. Darcy, which will it be? Yay or nay?”

“Nnnnn… Nnnnn… I AIN’T gonna do it. It’s a big YAY for me too. I was a foster puppy before you guys rescued me. A foster home is okay, but not like me and Lola got here. We got it made!”

“That’s my girl,” Human Mom said, rubbing Darcy’s head in appreciation.

“I know. I’m adorable,” Darcy said. “Just make sure I still get the foot of the bed at night.”

“Of course. It’s yours forever.”

After excitingly circling in place, Darcy declared, “Meeting over… Lola wake up! We got things to do. Lola… Lola. Ah, never mind. I’ll do it myself.”