The Blue Billowy Dress

The harvest moon over the Golden Gate Bridge looks beautiful tonight.  The cool breeze from the bay caresses my face and blows my hair out of the way.  Any other night I would be happy to be in such a beautiful place, but not tonight. Tonight my heart is breaking.

At three in the morning, there is very little traffic on the bridge. I imagine people coming from Halloween parties on their way home. Happy people. People that didn’t have to face death. 

I lift myself over the bridge’s rail bar and lean forward holding on to the cold metal beam… I feel free. I feel like I could fly. It’s an exhilarating feeling.  When should I let go?  I guess it’s up to me. I control this much. I can jump anytime I want. 

A beautiful woman comes at me out of nowhere. She stops six feet away from me. 

“Hello,” she says in a soothing voice.  Her blue billowy dress swaying in the breeze. 

“Who are you?” I asked.

“Nobody,” she says. 

For a nobody, she has a lot of nerve to interrupt me.  She doesn’t get any closer but I keep an eye on her just in case.

“Don’t try to stop me,” I say. 

“I won’t stop you, by all means, get on with it. Life is not worth it after the love of your life leaves you for another girl. I know.” she says.

“Hey, if you are trying to save my life, I must say, you are very bad at it.” 

She smiles. “Point taken.” 

We stand there in our comfortable silence amidst the sound of the gulls and faraway ships. 

“Well, are you going to jump?” She asks.

“Yes! Don’t try to stop me," I said. "I made up my mind.”  I thought about what she said. “Hey, how did you know about my boyfriend?” 

“I can tell just by looking at you.  You are not the first one and you will not be the last one, kiddo.” She looks down, “it’s a long way down and a swift death would be ideal but it’s not always that way, you know? You could hit the cold waters headfirst and survive as a complete vegetable.  Not a pretty sight.” 

I look at her in disbelief.  “What? You are the worst. Aren’t you going to ask me to get off the ledge? Isn’t that what you people do?” 

“YOU people?  What people?  I’m not here to stop you, I am here to cheer you on.”

“Why? Why would you do that? What kind of monster are you?”

“Same kind of monster as you are. Isn’t that why you are here? To jump?”

“No… I mean … Yes! Yes, but I could change my mind.” 

“Yes you could,” she said smiling.  

I looked down to the water and then back to her. “Thank …. Hello?"  Where did she go? She was gone and I didn’t even know her name.

After a few months, I was curious to know how many people jumped off the Golden Bridge so I did a little digging and viewed many pictures… so many people. A picture from the 40s caught my eye. It was a young lady in a blue billowy dress.