Biggles Bunny and Big Ted
A toddler learns a life lesson28 total reviews
Comment from Scarbrems
Aww, this is a lovely tale, with a teary ending. Horrible Ingrid, didn't we all know a child like that? Engaging writing throughout.
One nit:
'this day of your young youth when you were old enough to read that great classic' - Just 'youth' will do, no need for 'young'.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
  |
Aww, this is a lovely tale, with a teary ending. Horrible Ingrid, didn't we all know a child like that? Engaging writing throughout.
One nit:
'this day of your young youth when you were old enough to read that great classic' - Just 'youth' will do, no need for 'young'.
Comment Written 12-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
-
Thank you Sarkems for your comments.
Whilst what you say is true about the usage of young & youth is quite true, and I do appreciate you taking the time to point it out, I deliberately chose to use that pairing. It is from the voice of the mystery commentator, maybe from the subjects own mind or some other, perhaps the last judgement as they look back on her life. I don't know who. LOL
I am grateful for your comment so please do not hesitate in any future review to point out anything that catches your eye.
All the best, John
Comment from Dean Kuch
What a sugary sweet, sentimental story of fond family reminiscence, John.
You've done a splendid job of capturing the melancholy emotions Ingrid shares with us as she reflects back on a time on her life when she was helpless to prevent a bully from ravaging her beloved stuffed animals but her mom came to the rescue like the US Calvary in the final, waning moments.
In youth we often delude ourselves into believing that our parents are always going to be around to talk to, confide in..
Sadly that's not the case.
Well done, Sir!
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
|
What a sugary sweet, sentimental story of fond family reminiscence, John.
You've done a splendid job of capturing the melancholy emotions Ingrid shares with us as she reflects back on a time on her life when she was helpless to prevent a bully from ravaging her beloved stuffed animals but her mom came to the rescue like the US Calvary in the final, waning moments.
In youth we often delude ourselves into believing that our parents are always going to be around to talk to, confide in..
Sadly that's not the case.
Well done, Sir!
Comment Written 12-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
-
Hi Dean,
Thanks for the review. You have mistaken Ingrid for the heroine. LOL Probably because your bent is towards the darker characters, judging by your macabre writing.
All the best
John
Comment from D.Ream
This is such a beautiful and evocative piece. The language is carefully chosen and there is an economy of words which somehow make everything seem so much more powerful and vivid. The reader is able to fully empathise with the main character and we are able to view events through her eyes. The shift in time is skillfully handles and this has a very powerful effect on the reader.
Thanks for sharing such an emotional piece.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
 |
This is such a beautiful and evocative piece. The language is carefully chosen and there is an economy of words which somehow make everything seem so much more powerful and vivid. The reader is able to fully empathise with the main character and we are able to view events through her eyes. The shift in time is skillfully handles and this has a very powerful effect on the reader.
Thanks for sharing such an emotional piece.
Comment Written 11-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
-
Oh wow this is such a lovely review. Thank you so much for six stars :) I am most grateful.
Your words mean a lot to me. Thank you for taking the time to express your opinion in such detail.
All the very best
John
Comment from Catmusings
Poignant, touching and raw, too. I liked how you used the second person, not a POV that's used a lot. Very effective. A touching ending coming full circle with the main character there at her mother's funeral with her daughter and the toys. Well done.
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
Poignant, touching and raw, too. I liked how you used the second person, not a POV that's used a lot. Very effective. A touching ending coming full circle with the main character there at her mother's funeral with her daughter and the toys. Well done.
Comment Written 11-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Cat thank you for such a thoughtful review. I am most appreciative.
Best
John
Comment from LIJ Red
The lab mice would cross the charged grid when they got hungry enough, and boy mice would sometimes cross to their ladies, but mothers would always cross to their young...don't mess with a she-bear's cub...but this is an excellent salute to moms...
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
The lab mice would cross the charged grid when they got hungry enough, and boy mice would sometimes cross to their ladies, but mothers would always cross to their young...don't mess with a she-bear's cub...but this is an excellent salute to moms...
Comment Written 11-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Ha ha thanks Red.
Yes mothers are not be messed with in any shape or form.
best
John
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
What a beautiful, touching story about the love between mother and daughter. The funeral came as a surprise, but was very appropriate. Some things stay with us all our lives. She always knew her mom loved her and would keep her safe. Now, she's on her own, ready to be a great mom to her own child.
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
What a beautiful, touching story about the love between mother and daughter. The funeral came as a surprise, but was very appropriate. Some things stay with us all our lives. She always knew her mom loved her and would keep her safe. Now, she's on her own, ready to be a great mom to her own child.
Comment Written 11-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Thank you Phyllis. :)
This is a very well thought out review for which I am most grateful.
Best
John
Comment from pbomar1115
The story of your childhood experience with an awful guest playmate is an experience I can relate to as an innocent child around the same age. Ingrid's appalling behavior clearly was encouraged by her mother. Well written story.
Phillip
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
The story of your childhood experience with an awful guest playmate is an experience I can relate to as an innocent child around the same age. Ingrid's appalling behavior clearly was encouraged by her mother. Well written story.
Phillip
Comment Written 10-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Wow Phillip I am extremely grateful for the six stars, very much appreciated I can assure you.
Your positive comments are well received. It gives me pause when a reader relates personally to my work. I am very touched that you shared that personal thought.
Thank you very much.
Best
John
-
Many of the good writing here evokes images and memories for me.
Phillip
-
Phillip. I can certainly Ave that sentiment.
I am hugely impressed by the extremly high standard set by the writers and poets on t
this site. I am in in rare company indeed and greatly appreciative of the support I have received from you and other wonderful writers.
Best
John
-
Yes, indeed, the writers on the site are great while some remind you of that fact by being unfriendly socially at times because they seek goals that has nothing to do support. In fact, your mettle is tested every now and again. So, you can ignore the behavior and continue your writing journey. Good Luck, John.
Phillip
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
I loved this story from the first word to the last. It was about a mother's love, and a child's innocent memory.
This is what a parent should be like: always taking the side of the child, and leaving a bad situation better. How very inspiring!
On a personal note, I just lost my mother 4 months ago. It's funny the memories that come back when you do. Sometimes, it's the bad things, but most often it's just like the one you presented in this short story,
Great job, my friend,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
I loved this story from the first word to the last. It was about a mother's love, and a child's innocent memory.
This is what a parent should be like: always taking the side of the child, and leaving a bad situation better. How very inspiring!
On a personal note, I just lost my mother 4 months ago. It's funny the memories that come back when you do. Sometimes, it's the bad things, but most often it's just like the one you presented in this short story,
Great job, my friend,
Rhonda
Comment Written 10-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Oh my Rhonda I am so touched that you shared your personal reflections inspired by my little offering. First of all let me say I am very sorry for your loss. You say my little story is inspiring but believe me I am very much inspired by your kind words. It gives me great encouragement indeed that my writing touched you in a personal way.
Thank you so very much for sharing your thoughts with me and of course I am also extremely grateful for the six stars.
All the very best
John
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
What a lovely story, and I was really proud of that little girl managing to throw that toy at that nasty Ing! Yes!! How dare she rip our teddy to pieces, thank goodness mum understood and mended it. I loved the ending, that mums granddaughter was now the proud owner of Biggles Bunny and Big Ted! :)) Well done, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
What a lovely story, and I was really proud of that little girl managing to throw that toy at that nasty Ing! Yes!! How dare she rip our teddy to pieces, thank goodness mum understood and mended it. I loved the ending, that mums granddaughter was now the proud owner of Biggles Bunny and Big Ted! :)) Well done, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 10-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Thank you Sandra. :)
I am very pleased that you could relate to and enjoy this little story. Your encouraging comments are very much appreciated I can assure you.
Best
John
Comment from Mustang Patty
Hi there,
This is a truly beautiful story. I think there are more than a few of us who can relate to that 'one horrible day,' when a new 'friend' came to play. You captured it in such detail.
Mom always saves the day. The toys were rescued and still in good enough shape to last for at least one more generation. Well done,
~Mustang Patty~
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
Hi there,
This is a truly beautiful story. I think there are more than a few of us who can relate to that 'one horrible day,' when a new 'friend' came to play. You captured it in such detail.
Mom always saves the day. The toys were rescued and still in good enough shape to last for at least one more generation. Well done,
~Mustang Patty~
Comment Written 10-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Thank you Patty. I am truly grateful for your encouraging review and heartfelt words.
Best
John