summer's breeze
3-5-3 contest entry11 total reviews
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem with excellent advice on how to beat the heat. Sway in a hammock when the summer breeze glides between the trees. Lol.
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2016
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A very well-written poem with excellent advice on how to beat the heat. Sway in a hammock when the summer breeze glides between the trees. Lol.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2016
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Thank you Sandra for another awesome review my friend. I'm afraid if I were in a hammock here at the house, I would spontaneously combust lol. The temps here are ridiculous.
God bless!
Steve
Comment from LateBloomer
Hello author, very good 3-5-3 air poem - good imagery within. Of special note:
hammock sways
(Ohhh how lovely and relaxing.)
As this is a contest entry, I wish you good luck. LateBloomer
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Hello author, very good 3-5-3 air poem - good imagery within. Of special note:
hammock sways
(Ohhh how lovely and relaxing.)
As this is a contest entry, I wish you good luck. LateBloomer
Comment Written 02-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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I agree with the lovely relaxing mood this would put one in. Thank you for the awesome review my friend.
God bless!
Comment from frogbook
Excellent use of the prompt in this most picturesque little gem. Puts the reader right there watching those hammocks. Great job-best of luck with the vote.
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Excellent use of the prompt in this most picturesque little gem. Puts the reader right there watching those hammocks. Great job-best of luck with the vote.
Comment Written 02-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Thank you for the awesome review Frogbook.
God bless!
Comment from Ric Myworld
Great poem! Almost gives me goosebumps, wishing it was me on that hammock, sipping a salt-rimmed Margarita as the breeze ruffles my hair. Good luck! :-)
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2016
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Great poem! Almost gives me goosebumps, wishing it was me on that hammock, sipping a salt-rimmed Margarita as the breeze ruffles my hair. Good luck! :-)
Comment Written 02-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2016
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Oh what a wonderful scene Ric! I would enjoy the reality of a similar moment myself.
Thank you for the awesome review.
God bless!
Comment from TPAC
A nice conveyance, me in that sway is a pleasing thought feeling that wind cut under those trees. Gentle thoughts soothing to mind.
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2016
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A nice conveyance, me in that sway is a pleasing thought feeling that wind cut under those trees. Gentle thoughts soothing to mind.
Comment Written 02-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2016
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Thank you TPAC for the awesome review my friend. It was a nice feeling for me as well. Now if I can just make it a reality lol.
God bless!
Comment from cumulus365
Your poem meets the syllabic count 3/5/3. The meaning of the poem is achieved in relating to the topic with so many words. A very pleasant poem to read. Nicely written piece that resonate relaxation. Best.
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2016
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Your poem meets the syllabic count 3/5/3. The meaning of the poem is achieved in relating to the topic with so many words. A very pleasant poem to read. Nicely written piece that resonate relaxation. Best.
Comment Written 02-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2016
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Thank you cumulus for the excellent review my friend.
God bless!
Comment from fafa
The haiku is a difficult poem in its message because in few strophes it is necessary to communicate an idea, you have been his right, greetings and congratulations
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016
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The haiku is a difficult poem in its message because in few strophes it is necessary to communicate an idea, you have been his right, greetings and congratulations
Comment Written 01-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016
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Thank you again fafa for reviewing my work and the excellent stars.
God bless!
Comment from jandeck
Lovely, descriptive air poem. Reminds me of vacation in the Carribean. Beautiful, white hammocks were tied to the palm trees.
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016
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Lovely, descriptive air poem. Reminds me of vacation in the Carribean. Beautiful, white hammocks were tied to the palm trees.
Comment Written 01-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016
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Oh man! I could use that right about now! Thank you for the awesome review jandeck.
God bless!
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
What a nice thing to think about--in a hammock enjoying a cool breeze. Good job on the syllable count.
The word 'summers' should be [ summer's ].
Best wishes in the contest. Jan
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016
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What a nice thing to think about--in a hammock enjoying a cool breeze. Good job on the syllable count.
The word 'summers' should be [ summer's ].
Best wishes in the contest. Jan
Comment Written 01-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016
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Thank you Jannypan for the excellent and helpful review. I thought it might need the apostrophe, but hesitated lol.
God bless!
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You are welcome. Jan
Comment from kiwisteveh
This has the feel of a haiku, with your final line delivering the visual punchline of the hammock swaying in the breeze.
Nice rhyme in your first two lines echoed by 'sways' in the last.
Nice.
Steve
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016
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This has the feel of a haiku, with your final line delivering the visual punchline of the hammock swaying in the breeze.
Nice rhyme in your first two lines echoed by 'sways' in the last.
Nice.
Steve
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 01-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016
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Thank you Steve for the awesome review my friend.
God bless!