For Better, for Worse, ROADRUNNER!!
A story of love, an injured roadrunner, and the universe.32 total reviews
Comment from Kelly2
I almost peed my pants while reading this story. I had to take a break to the ladies room to ensure this wouldn't happen.
Do you know that I usually keep my amusement inside my head at movies, TV shows and books? Sue Grafton makes me laugh a lot iniside, but Janet Evanovich made me laugh out loud once. I was surprised at the sound.
That is, until I discovered you. My husband has found me in my office, doubled over in my chair with tears in my eyes, laughing like a cartoon hyena. He once thought I was in distress and apparently came to save me, only to find me on the floor, slapping the carpet and LITERALLY rolling in laughter.
Oh, jeez, this one is a riot. SOME of my favorite parts:
a colleague who lived nearby, returned home mid-ceremony for a beer only to find us "still going at it" (his words, not mine) on the altar a half hour later.
It was becoming obvious to at least me, HE- LP and a hearse had launched the universe's first two salvo's upon our nuptials. White lace, promises, and a kiss for luck would only go so far.
We would make easy victims limping along in my smokin' hot but turtle slow Camaro as we pulled into Gila Bend, Arizona; population,12. I was already regretting my Daisy Sharp Shooter BB gun not making it into my curler bag.
The universe quivered as we wondered if a marriage annulment based on papal defection by death might be cheaper than radial tires and a divorce.
SeaWorld where I was chosen out of the audience to be French kissed by Shamu #32
we rolled up to the Burbank Bahia to witness a stray dog peeing on the maid's cart parked outside our room.
A red velvet bed spread, and conquistadors killing bulls finished off the decor. It screamed romance. (You didn't even need the word Not after this.)
Neither of us exhibited the Marlin Perkins, Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom fearless swagger
The stars and planets aligned as I witnessed the man who stole my heart fifteen months earlier chase the flapping, wild, injured animal across the desert landscape in an attempt to save its life and appease his new wife. It was a moment of clarity. I had chosen well. The universe smiled. (Really funny, great visuals, and sweet as well. )
OK, the interactions with the border patrol guy had me over the top. My ribs hurt so bad from laughing, I may have splintered a bone in there.
I thought my wedding was crazy. Now I have to write it. I don't think I can top what you did with this story. It is spectacular.
Kelly
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2016
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I almost peed my pants while reading this story. I had to take a break to the ladies room to ensure this wouldn't happen.
Do you know that I usually keep my amusement inside my head at movies, TV shows and books? Sue Grafton makes me laugh a lot iniside, but Janet Evanovich made me laugh out loud once. I was surprised at the sound.
That is, until I discovered you. My husband has found me in my office, doubled over in my chair with tears in my eyes, laughing like a cartoon hyena. He once thought I was in distress and apparently came to save me, only to find me on the floor, slapping the carpet and LITERALLY rolling in laughter.
Oh, jeez, this one is a riot. SOME of my favorite parts:
a colleague who lived nearby, returned home mid-ceremony for a beer only to find us "still going at it" (his words, not mine) on the altar a half hour later.
It was becoming obvious to at least me, HE- LP and a hearse had launched the universe's first two salvo's upon our nuptials. White lace, promises, and a kiss for luck would only go so far.
We would make easy victims limping along in my smokin' hot but turtle slow Camaro as we pulled into Gila Bend, Arizona; population,12. I was already regretting my Daisy Sharp Shooter BB gun not making it into my curler bag.
The universe quivered as we wondered if a marriage annulment based on papal defection by death might be cheaper than radial tires and a divorce.
SeaWorld where I was chosen out of the audience to be French kissed by Shamu #32
we rolled up to the Burbank Bahia to witness a stray dog peeing on the maid's cart parked outside our room.
A red velvet bed spread, and conquistadors killing bulls finished off the decor. It screamed romance. (You didn't even need the word Not after this.)
Neither of us exhibited the Marlin Perkins, Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom fearless swagger
The stars and planets aligned as I witnessed the man who stole my heart fifteen months earlier chase the flapping, wild, injured animal across the desert landscape in an attempt to save its life and appease his new wife. It was a moment of clarity. I had chosen well. The universe smiled. (Really funny, great visuals, and sweet as well. )
OK, the interactions with the border patrol guy had me over the top. My ribs hurt so bad from laughing, I may have splintered a bone in there.
I thought my wedding was crazy. Now I have to write it. I don't think I can top what you did with this story. It is spectacular.
Kelly
Comment Written 10-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2016
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Hahaha, I LOVE reading your reviews on my work!!! You had ME roflo just reading thisl!! I also loved hearing about your favorite parts of it :) And woman, how do you have a six left to give me on a Saturday afternoon??? Thank you for reviewing a TWO CENTER! You are my hero :)
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I know....two lousy cents! But I should be the one paying YOU!
I decided to really hit the reviewing last week and built my bank up to almost $100 as of a few minutes ago, then I entered this romance story contest and decided to promote it, and got down somehow to just $74.26.
Grrr. You did tell me to stop the contests. But it was free...except for the promotions.
Mostly you get all my 6 stars. But sometimes someone else comes along who deserves it, so I eek it out to them, almost reluctantly.
I'm glad you liked my review. :) I loved your story!
Comment from jlsavell
Mary Wakeford, you are truly one of the best and most entertaining writers on this site. This story is so well written and so hysterical, you just have to save it and read it for another glum day to make you laugh. Exceptional!!!!!!!!
Jimi
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2016
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Mary Wakeford, you are truly one of the best and most entertaining writers on this site. This story is so well written and so hysterical, you just have to save it and read it for another glum day to make you laugh. Exceptional!!!!!!!!
Jimi
Comment Written 07-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2016
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Jimi, what a wonderful review...and then that SIX!! I'm sorry you didn't get to review it when it was paying though. :( (You're two-center was worth a million to me)!
Thank you, thank you, thank you! Have a wonderful week!
Comment from Ulla
Hi Mary. Wonderful story. What else could possibly go wrong? I can see That if one is a catholic and actually believe in it, there was a few bad omens here. Loved your story. All the best. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2016
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Hi Mary. Wonderful story. What else could possibly go wrong? I can see That if one is a catholic and actually believe in it, there was a few bad omens here. Loved your story. All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 04-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2016
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Thank you very much, Ulla, for the RR&R! I very much appreciate it! Have a great weekend!
Comment from TheWriteTeach
Wow. You and your new hubby certainly had more than your share of bad things happen. It must have seemed like a nightmare to the two of you! I couldn't believe what I was reading - one awful thing after another. I had a large number of things go wrong during my own wedding ceremony and the reception, but nothing continued to happen after the wedding day! If it had, I think we would also have had thoughts about annulment vs. divorce! I was sure you were going to end up with Roadie, and was saddened when the cop took him. I want to believe he really was given to the Fish & Game agent, and did not face the Colt 45 behind the building.
You did a nice job with this. I enjoyed reading about all your wedding and honeymoon disasters!
Suzanne
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Wow. You and your new hubby certainly had more than your share of bad things happen. It must have seemed like a nightmare to the two of you! I couldn't believe what I was reading - one awful thing after another. I had a large number of things go wrong during my own wedding ceremony and the reception, but nothing continued to happen after the wedding day! If it had, I think we would also have had thoughts about annulment vs. divorce! I was sure you were going to end up with Roadie, and was saddened when the cop took him. I want to believe he really was given to the Fish & Game agent, and did not face the Colt 45 behind the building.
You did a nice job with this. I enjoyed reading about all your wedding and honeymoon disasters!
Suzanne
Comment Written 03-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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I didnt even mention the part that my uncle had died a year before we married, and he had married both my brother and sister, and cousin, so I was already feeling like that was a setback not being married by an uncle i adored...thank you so much for your RR&R, SO VERY APPRECIATED!!
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Pretty foooooking good. Funny story about a usually serious subject, unexpected.
Can't think of any negatives. Once I started reading I didn't want to stop.
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Pretty foooooking good. Funny story about a usually serious subject, unexpected.
Can't think of any negatives. Once I started reading I didn't want to stop.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Hahaha, thank you, Thomas, for the foooooooking funny review too! I appreciate your words of encouragement :) Pete the Pigeon is up next...stay tuned :) Have a great evening and thank you for hanging in for a longer read too!
Comment from TAB_that's me
You write the most humorous stories! "still going at it" - a beer really? It takes all kinds:)
And your husbands shoe - lol.
The whole thing sounds quite eventful:)
But...the best is that it has lasted:) Happy Anniversary.
Very enjoyable story.
Teresa
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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You write the most humorous stories! "still going at it" - a beer really? It takes all kinds:)
And your husbands shoe - lol.
The whole thing sounds quite eventful:)
But...the best is that it has lasted:) Happy Anniversary.
Very enjoyable story.
Teresa
Comment Written 03-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Thank you, Teresa, for your RR&R, and great remarks. I appreciate your continued interest! Have a great evening!
Comment from giraffmang
Hi Mary,
You have such a style to your writing and a great turn of phrase that makes for very easy and enjoyable reading. Lots of wry smiles abound. LOL
a beer only to find us "still going at it" (his words, not mine) on the altar a half hour later. - that's hilarious!
played from the car's 8-track stereo - the younger generation's loss!
semi's - semis I think this is just a plural.
Excellent post
GMG
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Hi Mary,
You have such a style to your writing and a great turn of phrase that makes for very easy and enjoyable reading. Lots of wry smiles abound. LOL
a beer only to find us "still going at it" (his words, not mine) on the altar a half hour later. - that's hilarious!
played from the car's 8-track stereo - the younger generation's loss!
semi's - semis I think this is just a plural.
Excellent post
GMG
Comment Written 03-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Good morning, giraffmang, and thank you for your wonderful review, and for the catch on semis, which looks so strange, so I altogether changed it to semi trucks :) I appreciate your keen eye and lovely remarks. Thsnk you for stopping by, and for commiting to a longer read!
Have an excellent day!
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
This is very well written and thoroughly engaging. No SPAG to be had which always makes the reading more enjoyable. I have to give you two kudos as the average couple would have given up after the first couple of hours of mishaps LOL. I hope all went as well for poor little Roady as it seems to have gone for you and your hubby. Congratulations on your upcoming anniversary and may the be many more in your future. Nicely done and I thank you very much for sharing it.
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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This is very well written and thoroughly engaging. No SPAG to be had which always makes the reading more enjoyable. I have to give you two kudos as the average couple would have given up after the first couple of hours of mishaps LOL. I hope all went as well for poor little Roady as it seems to have gone for you and your hubby. Congratulations on your upcoming anniversary and may the be many more in your future. Nicely done and I thank you very much for sharing it.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Thank you for the excellent review and
your kind remarks. I'm glad you enjoyed the write, and I am especially grateful when reviewers commit to my longer reads. Have an awesome day!
Comment from MelB
Hi Mary, wow, this is quite an adventure you went on. I have to say, I would have stopped and helped the bird too. Did you ever find out who wrote HE-LP on the shoes? Congrats on your 38th Anniversary! Fabulous duo - The Carpenters.
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Hi Mary, wow, this is quite an adventure you went on. I have to say, I would have stopped and helped the bird too. Did you ever find out who wrote HE-LP on the shoes? Congrats on your 38th Anniversary! Fabulous duo - The Carpenters.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2016
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Hi Melissa! Thank you so much for the RR&R! No one fessed up to the shoe caper, and given they were rented with the tuxedo's, I decided to give them the benefit of doubt. It's actually pretty funny on the close up photographs it can clearly be seen, which lends me to believe someone in OUR wedding party must have done it or it would have been scratched up, my guess! Thanks again for the review, and continued interest in my work. Have a great rest of the week!
Comment from Ric Myworld
Happy 38th anniversary! And many more! Sounds like your husband got a gem in you too. And as a writer? all I can say is wow! I've already used more exclamation points than I would in a whole book, and I'm just revving up. You are quick, witty, and could sell Martian rocks at Sunday mass. I don't know if you've ever thought about writing a pilot for a television show? I mean, you can rattle 'um off faster than Lucille Ball with her panties on fire. They are always looking for those kinds of writers, because in truth, there just aren't many who can just come with one-liners one right after another in continuous succession. Well, I sure wish I had a six! Because you definitely earned one with this. Great job! I really enjoyed it! :-)
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2016
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Happy 38th anniversary! And many more! Sounds like your husband got a gem in you too. And as a writer? all I can say is wow! I've already used more exclamation points than I would in a whole book, and I'm just revving up. You are quick, witty, and could sell Martian rocks at Sunday mass. I don't know if you've ever thought about writing a pilot for a television show? I mean, you can rattle 'um off faster than Lucille Ball with her panties on fire. They are always looking for those kinds of writers, because in truth, there just aren't many who can just come with one-liners one right after another in continuous succession. Well, I sure wish I had a six! Because you definitely earned one with this. Great job! I really enjoyed it! :-)
Comment Written 02-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2016
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Thank you, Ric! This just might be my all time favorite review...E.V.E.R!!! I just read it to "Mr. HE LP" and he reacted with a huge smile and said WOW!! He's been trying to get me to do something with my writing for years and I'm just now doing it. I really do appreciate you committing to a longer read and for the wonderful review. Would you be comfortable if I removed all identifiers and placed it on my Facebook Author page? If you have the slightest hesitation, I am fine just posting on the wall of my office :) Have an awesome evening and thank you so much for you "if only" six...it balances, at least in my head, the three I received yesterday for it :)
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My dear, you can post this anywhere you like. I'm not the type to ever write anything that I don't wholeheartedly believe. And, I'm a big boy who is willing to stand up for anything I think is right. Oh, but, I do wish you would capitolize the A, and WOW in "All I can say is WOW!" Keep up the good work! :-)
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You're awesome! Thank you so much. I can put a sticker over the 'a' how is that? I appreciate you, Ric!