Jana - The Prostitute
A character of a book comes to life.17 total reviews
Comment from TomFoolery
Ohh I like this.
We all have had ideas or characters that get in to our night and day dreams that we can't shake until they are written down, but to be haunted by one until a more favourable outcome is written is a fantastic idea.
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2015
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Ohh I like this.
We all have had ideas or characters that get in to our night and day dreams that we can't shake until they are written down, but to be haunted by one until a more favourable outcome is written is a fantastic idea.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2015
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Thanks Tom, I write about our people because little is known of our aboriginal myths and legends - another little chapter to my book. Blessings, Kay.
Comment from CHIGYSISKI
NICE INTRIGUING PLOT TO THIS CONTEST ENTRY.THIS IS A BIT SCARY. WE REALLY MUST BE CAREFUL WHAT WE WRITE, LEST OUR CHARACTERS COME TO LIFE. GREAT IMAGINATION WELL DONE!BEST OF LUCK WITH THE CONTEST.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2014
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NICE INTRIGUING PLOT TO THIS CONTEST ENTRY.THIS IS A BIT SCARY. WE REALLY MUST BE CAREFUL WHAT WE WRITE, LEST OUR CHARACTERS COME TO LIFE. GREAT IMAGINATION WELL DONE!BEST OF LUCK WITH THE CONTEST.
Comment Written 27-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2014
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Thank you for your interest - glad you liked the story. Cheers, Kay.
Comment from Loren (7)
Certainly a different slant to the prompt, showing a lot of depth. It is as if your imagination took flight and we were carried on its wings into a very interesting, almost introspective tale. Gook luck in the contest : ) Loren
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2014
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Certainly a different slant to the prompt, showing a lot of depth. It is as if your imagination took flight and we were carried on its wings into a very interesting, almost introspective tale. Gook luck in the contest : ) Loren
Comment Written 25-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2014
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Thank you for reading Loren, glad you liked the story - one tries to visualise and become part of the tale. :-) Kay XX
Comment from mermaids
You have a gift here,I love this story! I like the creativity of the character coming to life and haunting the author! This definately a story to be published. Usually,I do not review much prose,it has to hold my interest and you hooked me in here. I am not skilled at reviewing prose,so the grammar and sentence structures appear fine to me. You have strong character development in this story which also held me into it. Best wishes for the contest.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2014
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You have a gift here,I love this story! I like the creativity of the character coming to life and haunting the author! This definately a story to be published. Usually,I do not review much prose,it has to hold my interest and you hooked me in here. I am not skilled at reviewing prose,so the grammar and sentence structures appear fine to me. You have strong character development in this story which also held me into it. Best wishes for the contest.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2014
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Thank you my friend; glad you were hooked and enjoyed the story. Cheers, Kay :-)
Comment from GeraldS
I've read a bunch of these stories lately, all very different. It is amazing how this picture inspired creativity for so many on this site. Your story is quite different from most. It was nicely written and interesting to read. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2014
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I've read a bunch of these stories lately, all very different. It is amazing how this picture inspired creativity for so many on this site. Your story is quite different from most. It was nicely written and interesting to read. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 24-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2014
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Thank you Gerald. Glad it was nicely written and interesting to read. Cheers, Kay.
Comment from jlsavell
Kace, sweet Kace, such a cleverly constructed story! Loved the characters and the development as it went smoothly along transitioning. Rather creepy...sort of like a Steven King thing. Maybe the author will think twice about his next story. Loved it, loved it. I, also, love it when a true poetess stretches her writing to prose and creates amazing stories. Such talent my sweet friend. On another note, do you sell your beautiful art? Jimi
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2014
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Kace, sweet Kace, such a cleverly constructed story! Loved the characters and the development as it went smoothly along transitioning. Rather creepy...sort of like a Steven King thing. Maybe the author will think twice about his next story. Loved it, loved it. I, also, love it when a true poetess stretches her writing to prose and creates amazing stories. Such talent my sweet friend. On another note, do you sell your beautiful art? Jimi
Comment Written 24-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2014
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Jiminy Cricket, That horrible painting to go with the story is NOT my art! We were asked to write a story to go with the painting of the woman on the bed. LOL. I am an artist and I have sold a lot of my paintings, I'll send you a picture with email. Thanks my friend. Love, Kay.
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Oh I knew that was not yours. I meant the pics you gad sent to me a while back of the turtle.
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Yes, I thought I had sent you some photos of my work. I used to sell a lot - haven't painted for a year due to lack of interest and arthritis! :-[ love XX
Comment from Writingfundimension
Well, this was certainly very creepy, Kay. I like the way you turned the tables on the writer, as the creator of the story, and brought the characters to life to make their own demands! A cautionary tale in some ways. Good luck in the contest with this excellent entry.
Hugs, Bev
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2014
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Well, this was certainly very creepy, Kay. I like the way you turned the tables on the writer, as the creator of the story, and brought the characters to life to make their own demands! A cautionary tale in some ways. Good luck in the contest with this excellent entry.
Hugs, Bev
Comment Written 24-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2014
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Bev, Thanks so much my friend - glad you enjoyed the story. I enjoyed writing it - didn't like the painting! Love, K.
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You're so very welcome, Kay. Always a pleasure, my friend. :) Bev
Comment from Alan K Pease
Excellent story for you put your heart into this one. The aim of a good story is to bring your characters to life and you have surely done that. I am sure that a spirit world does exist in America and elseware. The brother of a friend of mine is a Major in the air force; a trained observer not easily spooked. One night he saw the reflection of a woman and her child in the hallway mirror and when he turned on the light they were gone. He was not the sort of man who easily spooked. Your turning out a lot to stories and your good at it. A novel in the offing?. Love Alan
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2014
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Excellent story for you put your heart into this one. The aim of a good story is to bring your characters to life and you have surely done that. I am sure that a spirit world does exist in America and elseware. The brother of a friend of mine is a Major in the air force; a trained observer not easily spooked. One night he saw the reflection of a woman and her child in the hallway mirror and when he turned on the light they were gone. He was not the sort of man who easily spooked. Your turning out a lot to stories and your good at it. A novel in the offing?. Love Alan
Comment Written 24-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2014
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Hello my dear friend Alan, Glad you enjoyed. No, can't write a book - have one in my portfolio about myths and legends of the Aboriginal Dreamtime. Did you ask about your eleven, six star reviews, for your old poem re posted?? Love, Kay.
Comment from adewpearl
There are several places I would use a period instead of a comma to avoid a comma splice
I like your attention-grabbing intro that has me wondering along with the narrator who this "intruder" is
look in the mirror, darling - add comma for direct address
the rest came from my book, and the name - I added the comma
You're my pimp, darling - I love how this writer's book has come alive, recruiting him as a leading character, a pimp, no less
Hello, Razor - add comma for direct address
I decided to ignore her, and so I wiped - add comma
Can you hear that, grandma - Grandma
there are several places like the above line where you need to add a comma with direct address
love Grandma's explanation of the Jin Jin
great happy ending to this clever story :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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There are several places I would use a period instead of a comma to avoid a comma splice
I like your attention-grabbing intro that has me wondering along with the narrator who this "intruder" is
look in the mirror, darling - add comma for direct address
the rest came from my book, and the name - I added the comma
You're my pimp, darling - I love how this writer's book has come alive, recruiting him as a leading character, a pimp, no less
Hello, Razor - add comma for direct address
I decided to ignore her, and so I wiped - add comma
Can you hear that, grandma - Grandma
there are several places like the above line where you need to add a comma with direct address
love Grandma's explanation of the Jin Jin
great happy ending to this clever story :-) Brooke
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Ooh, now you can go to bed. Thanks so much for editing, hope I can find my way through the maze! Nite, Nite, Hope the bed bugs don't bite. XX K :-)
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It's only 8:22 - you always want to put me to bed at a baby's bedtime. LOL :-)
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Oops, I want you to last the distance ...Hee, Hee. It is 10.0am now.
Comment from Jean Lutz
Oh my, this pretty well sums up some areas of New Orleans. Writers, prostitutes, those that practice magic and of course, churches. Great entry and I wish you the best with it.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Oh my, this pretty well sums up some areas of New Orleans. Writers, prostitutes, those that practice magic and of course, churches. Great entry and I wish you the best with it.
Comment Written 23-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2014
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Hello Jeanie, Thanks for reading, glad you liked it - maybe I should set it in New Orleans. Bless you, K.