Ambrosia
Mining in space 597 words35 total reviews
Comment from words
Great, clean write that packs a punch.
Love the details of the levels of water.
Unfortunately, I am afraid that it is harbinger of things to come.
Water someday will be a most precious commodity.
Hugs, d
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2014
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Great, clean write that packs a punch.
Love the details of the levels of water.
Unfortunately, I am afraid that it is harbinger of things to come.
Water someday will be a most precious commodity.
Hugs, d
Comment Written 03-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2014
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Oh, my. You have certainly made my day, Words! I have not posted anything in a month and did not expect any reviews, and most certainly not a sixer. I appreciate your exceptional rating and review. Thank you also for your thoughts on the subject. Water is pretty precious.
Comment from adewpearl
You introduce your main characters and set the stage well
You work in back story of Gramps well
I love the idea of boutique water :-)
A most provocative look into the future where water is the most treasured of items
Brooke
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
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You introduce your main characters and set the stage well
You work in back story of Gramps well
I love the idea of boutique water :-)
A most provocative look into the future where water is the most treasured of items
Brooke
Comment Written 28-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
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Thank you for the review. Except for class, I haven't posted anything to the site since Jan 1st. Your review was a nice surprise. The story was sparked by the contest and a Nova segment that discussed the future of space exploration, including mining asteroids for minerals and water.
Comment from boxergirl
I like the clean science fiction entry that you have created for the contest. And what could be cleaner than water? :-)
The descriptions and dialogue are realistic for science fiction and kept me engaged from the start. Well done. 8-)
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
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I like the clean science fiction entry that you have created for the contest. And what could be cleaner than water? :-)
The descriptions and dialogue are realistic for science fiction and kept me engaged from the start. Well done. 8-)
Comment Written 21-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2014
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Thank you for the unexpected review, Boxergirl. I appreciate the kind comments and encouragement.
Comment from michaelcahill
Hi. I like this a lot. The environmental undertones are most cool and the value that we place on things as well. The characters in your little story draw the reader in well and are very likable and believable. A very well done piece. That was wise to choose a Grandpa and granddaughter as characters as it would be natural for them not to swear! Great job. mikey
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2014
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Hi. I like this a lot. The environmental undertones are most cool and the value that we place on things as well. The characters in your little story draw the reader in well and are very likable and believable. A very well done piece. That was wise to choose a Grandpa and granddaughter as characters as it would be natural for them not to swear! Great job. mikey
Comment Written 13-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2014
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Thank you, Mikey. I am so pleased that you liked this little sci-fi piece. I'm thinking it might be fun to expand it into a longer story. Thank you for all the positive comments. I appreciate the encouragement,
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Yes. It has great components with likeable characters. Stands out I think. Maybe add some other common elements as well. mikey
Comment from Selina Stambi
Hi wjd,
This is very imaginative. A billionaire gramps - not a rancher or banker: a very different kind of entrepreneur!
All the best in the contest. I'm sure your pastor will love it and be proud of you!
Happy New Year to you and happy writing in 2014.
Sonali xxx
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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Hi wjd,
This is very imaginative. A billionaire gramps - not a rancher or banker: a very different kind of entrepreneur!
All the best in the contest. I'm sure your pastor will love it and be proud of you!
Happy New Year to you and happy writing in 2014.
Sonali xxx
Comment Written 06-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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Thank you for all the kind words, Sonali. I appreciate the encouragement. Happy New Year and happy writing to you as well. Have a wonderful 2014.
Comment from DionysusDeVille
Space travel with a heart, you gotta love it. I do enjoy the bond between the grandfather and his princess, it feels very well and not forcibly written
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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Space travel with a heart, you gotta love it. I do enjoy the bond between the grandfather and his princess, it feels very well and not forcibly written
Comment Written 06-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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Thank you very much for the encouraging review.
Comment from elchupakabra
I stepped out of the space cruiser. The hangar of the space station was huge. - Words are precious in a write like this. You've established your in space, so you don't need to say space station, just station, or docking bay.
Other than that I thought this was really an excellent write all around. It's so true that water is the most precious substance, and eventually we're going to run out of fresh water and will be forced to create expensive distilleries controlled by corporations that boil sea and ocean water for our use. It's pretty ridiculous if you ask me. Hopefully capitalization peters out in the next ten to twenty years and we figure our shit out. 'Scuse the language. Great work, thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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I stepped out of the space cruiser. The hangar of the space station was huge. - Words are precious in a write like this. You've established your in space, so you don't need to say space station, just station, or docking bay.
Other than that I thought this was really an excellent write all around. It's so true that water is the most precious substance, and eventually we're going to run out of fresh water and will be forced to create expensive distilleries controlled by corporations that boil sea and ocean water for our use. It's pretty ridiculous if you ask me. Hopefully capitalization peters out in the next ten to twenty years and we figure our shit out. 'Scuse the language. Great work, thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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I appreciate the suggestion for improvement. I think I will change it to docking bay. Thank you so much for the kind comments about the writing. I find them encouraging. Thanks for sharing your insights on water and capitalism as well.
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No problem. Whenever you get a chance, please check out chapter 23 of my script the Change. It's titled Going Home and is currently being promoted on the first page :)
Comment from humpwhistle
You know, I miss the sex and cuss words. Kidding. But censorship is censorship.
I like your story very much. Water equated to olive oil--or nearly. Gramps has the goods. And it may come down to that.
Peace, Lee
"So what (are?) you most interested in doing while you're here, Abigail?"
"Minerals do bring in money, barely enough to cover expenses and string a fellow along. The real fortune is in the water." --maybe you need to tag this one--or attach it to the line above.
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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You know, I miss the sex and cuss words. Kidding. But censorship is censorship.
I like your story very much. Water equated to olive oil--or nearly. Gramps has the goods. And it may come down to that.
Peace, Lee
"So what (are?) you most interested in doing while you're here, Abigail?"
"Minerals do bring in money, barely enough to cover expenses and string a fellow along. The real fortune is in the water." --maybe you need to tag this one--or attach it to the line above.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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Thank you for the suggestions for improvement. I will make the changes. I am so happy you liked the story.It means a lot coming from the author of the year. Thank you for the encouragement. I appreciate it.
Comment from Writingfundimension
I think this is a terrific contest entry. Very creative and well-written. It's not easy writing flash fiction. I think you've a real knack for it. Good luck!
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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I think this is a terrific contest entry. Very creative and well-written. It's not easy writing flash fiction. I think you've a real knack for it. Good luck!
Comment Written 06-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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Thank you. It was my first attempt at flash fiction so I find your comments very encouraging. I appreciate the kind comments.
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You're very welcome. Your first attempt? Even more awesome. :0) Bev
Comment from chasennov
'Ambrosia.' You have written a nice piece of Science Fiction here, and I found the structure to be solid, and the formulation very interesting. Well done.
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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'Ambrosia.' You have written a nice piece of Science Fiction here, and I found the structure to be solid, and the formulation very interesting. Well done.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2014
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Thank you for the encouraging remarks and generous stars, Chasennov. I appreciate it!
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You are most welcome.