Comment from jmdg1954

Excellent

Okay, I'm making headway in catching up in your novel and enjoying the ensuing ride.

The charectors are all falling in line and I'm gearing up to see where they lead me.

Jersey Mikes, huh. The #5 and #13 seem to be our go to subs and Danny Devito does a great job promoting them.

Thanks, Jim.

John

 Comment Written 17-Dec-2024

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reply by the author on 17-Dec-2024

I'm kind of partial to the #13 myself--Mike's way, of course!

So glad you're enjoying the story, John.

Comment from Carol Hillebrenner

Excellent

Marie has turned into a human being instead of a snob. Yeah! Dana is getting into her new role and can feel better about herself. And Whoopee! Abby is coming back. I am certain she will find the project Brian needs her for very interesting.

 Comment Written 16-Dec-2024

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reply by the author on 16-Dec-2024

Let's just say Marie is making progress, but progress often is two steps forward, one step back. Yes Dana is definitely feeling good about things now. She will surprise us soon with her enthusiasm for her new role.

I couldn't resist bringing Abby back for this, but I had to figure out a good way to do it. We'll begin to find out in Chapter 16. She will have a limited role, but it will be very important.

Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill

Excellent

Like tangents much?Brian is a small hub surrounded by spokes. You can go off many different ways. This is pulling people from everywhere. You are talented my friend. Love to you and yours. Karen

 Comment Written 15-Dec-2024

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reply by the author on 16-Dec-2024

Thanks so much for your kind words, Karen. Yes, I do like tangents. In fact, I've enjoyed writing about Marie so much, that she will become a major tangent. But I promise she will have a role in the story related to the major plots eventually. And I couldn't resist bringing Abby into the story. She's been in almost all of my novels now and was the star of Some Call It Luck. She's always been my favorite character.

reply by Karen Cherry Threadgill on 16-Dec-2024

One of the these days I will have to read your old stuff. no time right now. Karen

Comment from T B Botts

Excellent

Hello Jim,
all of the dialogue is believable. There is a lot of small talk here, but it lends itself to the reality of the story. It's nice to see that Marie is smitten with her grandson. Something like a grandchild can change a person's entire attitude. Well done.
Have a blessed day.
Tom

 Comment Written 15-Dec-2024

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reply by the author on 16-Dec-2024

Thanks so much, Tom. Your remark about the small talk was a good reminder to me that I have to always make sure it is relevant and not too excessive. In fact, I largely rewrote chapter 29, which I'm working on now, and cut out a lot of unnecessary small talk. It's important to have just enough to keep things real without overdoing it.

For sure, having a grandson is an important part of her transformation. There will be several other factors as well. I don't want to completely change her personality, though, because I enjoy her sarcastic wit and imperious nature.

reply by T B Botts on 17-Dec-2024

Hi Jim,
I suppose a leopard can't change it's spots, but I agree, she needs to maintain a bit of a sharp edge.

Comment from Wendy G

Excellent

Excellent that she knows a brilliant mathematician. I'll look forward to seeing how whw can apply her mathematical skills to this problem. meanwhile Marie is having a very interesting and positive change of attirude to all of them! Super chapter. Continues to be interesting and it is developing well and at a good pace.
Wendy

 Comment Written 15-Dec-2024

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reply by the author on 15-Dec-2024

I had to do some research to figure out how to bring mathematics into the solution of the problem, but it actually fits in very well with the requirements for the solution. I won't be going into much detail of that because it's far beyond my ability to understand and even describe what she will do, but I will at least hint at it.

I've found that as the novel progresses, I'm spending more and more time on the development of Marie's character because I find her fascinating and amusing. It's becoming sort of a third plot line.

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

Yay! Abby is coming back into your book! And now she can help with the math while Dana can help with controlling the rumor mill that Big Pharma wants to start. It's good to see that Marie is coming into a more gracious grandmotherly personality.

 Comment Written 14-Dec-2024

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reply by the author on 14-Dec-2024

Abby will be with us for a little while. She doesn't have a huge role in this, but it's an important one.

I've been finding that the more I write this story, the more time I've been spending developing Marie's character. She fascinates me, and her transformation is becoming a third major plot line in the story. It will all come together in the end. I promise.

reply by lyenochka on 15-Dec-2024

I do like your redemption theme. Brian overcame addiction. Dana is a changed person. Marie is a changed person. And through forgiveness and love, there is a new beginning for each of them.

Comment from lancellot

Exceptional

Nice chapter, everything moved smoothly, friendly and with a good wholesome vibe. I saw no editing things to smooth out. Good work.



Dana is very bright and picked it all up quickly.
-(If possible, I recommend showing this. Have Dana display her knowledge and uptick.)

 Comment Written 14-Dec-2024

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reply by the author on 14-Dec-2024

Thanks, Lance. I appreciate your comments and suggestion, and, of course, the 6 stars.

We get a visit from an old friend in the next chapter, then, starting in chapter 16, we find out what Brian's plan is for stopping the spread of his first drug.

Comment from Pearl Edwards

Excellent

A major turnaround as Marie finally lets her emotions show and allows her daughter and grandson in. I'm sure the new CI won't fin things as simple and easy as it now sounds. A good chapter ombining all these characters, Jim.
cheers
valda

 Comment Written 14-Dec-2024

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reply by the author on 14-Dec-2024

Thanks, valda. This isn't the final word yet on Marie. It will be a process of two steps forward, one step back until she finally gets it right, if ever totally right.

Comment from Ric Myworld

Excellent

Things seem to be sliding together almost like the pieces of a puzzle. But in stories, as in life, when it seems to be too good to be true, you can bet it most always is. :-) Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 14-Dec-2024

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reply by the author on 14-Dec-2024

You bet it is, Ric. And sometimes you've got the wrong piece in the puzzle, and it looks like it fits, but doesn't quite and throws things off.

Comment from royowen

Exceptional

The change in Marie is huge, it's a funny thing that what is formed in the childhood area of one's youth would be incredibly difficult to adjust in progressive adulthood I would imagine anyway, pride adjustment can be a huge sacrifice, it can take sometime in a repentant Christian, but it's fascinating to hear Marie speaking the way she does, great post Jim, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 14-Dec-2024

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reply by the author on 14-Dec-2024

Thanks so much, Roy, and for those 6 stars too. We're not done with Marie by a long shot, and it may be a while before we see the kind of progress we hope to see from her. As I write this story, her part in it seems to be taking on a life of its own and is becoming a third major plot line. I just enjoy writing about her.

reply by royowen on 14-Dec-2024

A good character