The Odd Souvenir
Things are always what they appear to be.19 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
You wrote a very engaging and scary story! And you also show us the possibility of things in our own world which might possibly destroy it completely. It started out so innocuous and simple but was very much a catastrophe! Hope this does well in the contest!
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2024
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You wrote a very engaging and scary story! And you also show us the possibility of things in our own world which might possibly destroy it completely. It started out so innocuous and simple but was very much a catastrophe! Hope this does well in the contest!
Comment Written 05-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2024
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Thank you Helen. I'm in the dark when it come to SciFi. I don't usually even read it so I have to write it as if it were true.
Beth
Comment from joann r romei
This was fantastic, I enjoyed it and for a moment or two, It read as if had truly happened, well you not only have talent for memoir writing but also fiction,
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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This was fantastic, I enjoyed it and for a moment or two, It read as if had truly happened, well you not only have talent for memoir writing but also fiction,
Comment Written 03-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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Thank you Joann. I'm so glad you liked this. I appreciated your comment and the six stars.
Beth
Comment from pome lover
Boy, do you have a marvelous imagination!
That is a great Sci Fi story - you almost had me thinking it was real.
Congrats on being recognized. I think you deserve All Time Best.
What a thriller!
Katharine
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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Boy, do you have a marvelous imagination!
That is a great Sci Fi story - you almost had me thinking it was real.
Congrats on being recognized. I think you deserve All Time Best.
What a thriller!
Katharine
Comment Written 03-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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Thank you so much for the review and six stars. It was a fun challenge as I've tried but one other Sci FI story. I enjoyed your comments.
Beth
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well, that is one genre you sure have a talent for.
Comment from Verna Cole Mitchell
I usually don't read longer stories, but you drew me in with this one. It was well written all the way through. Wow! What an imagination you have. I hope this will win in the contest.
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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I usually don't read longer stories, but you drew me in with this one. It was well written all the way through. Wow! What an imagination you have. I hope this will win in the contest.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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Thank you Verna. I usually don't write longer stories but when I went back and read, I had make it longer because it called for at 2000 words. I really appreciate the review. I'm so glad you like it.
Beth
Comment from royowen
Well done with this, you don't often write fiction, but this is a goodie and deserves to be read Beth, the thought the story was true for a minute, this reminded of the stories that a sci fantasy writer wrote, a couple of his stories made to the film industry, his name was John Wyndom, beautifully written Beth, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2024
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Well done with this, you don't often write fiction, but this is a goodie and deserves to be read Beth, the thought the story was true for a minute, this reminded of the stories that a sci fantasy writer wrote, a couple of his stories made to the film industry, his name was John Wyndom, beautifully written Beth, blessings Roy
Comment Written 02-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2024
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Thank you Roy, You are right. I don't write fiction often. I'm pleased to have you say I remind you of this well known writer. I didn't think I would get such positive comments as I did on this stroy. I just wrote it to see if I could.
Beth
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I liked it, keep doing it.
Comment from Wendy G
I thought this was going to be a part of your memoirs and I started out believing it was real. You wrote so convincingly, and with flair and imagination. A VERY good entry for the contest! Best wishes., I am sure this will receive the reward it deserves.
Wendy
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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I thought this was going to be a part of your memoirs and I started out believing it was real. You wrote so convincingly, and with flair and imagination. A VERY good entry for the contest! Best wishes., I am sure this will receive the reward it deserves.
Wendy
Comment Written 02-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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Thank you Wendy. A lot people thought this was the begining of another biological story. I appreciate the review and comment and ths six stars.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
What an imagination you have, Beth. And, yes, I could really believe this was true (for a while anyway:)) The comprehensive way in which the story unfolds and the excellent dialogue bring it all to life in vivid detail. Arguably (I know they were vicious and killed one person) they could have been made even more menacing in appearance. But I think the moral of the story is about the mysteries that still exist in our world and, the caution that should be taken because we don't know everything! And could be held accountable. Thank you for sharing this excellent story. And good luck! Debbie. Some edits below:
He placed it on its end(,) securing the rounded edge by... (I think it flows better by removing that extra 'by')
This site le(d) me to many other sites.
From what we('ve) been told those things are all over the inside of your house
...more than they intended to tell me(.) I will always
As to how the egg had (had-delete)
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2024
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What an imagination you have, Beth. And, yes, I could really believe this was true (for a while anyway:)) The comprehensive way in which the story unfolds and the excellent dialogue bring it all to life in vivid detail. Arguably (I know they were vicious and killed one person) they could have been made even more menacing in appearance. But I think the moral of the story is about the mysteries that still exist in our world and, the caution that should be taken because we don't know everything! And could be held accountable. Thank you for sharing this excellent story. And good luck! Debbie. Some edits below:
He placed it on its end(,) securing the rounded edge by... (I think it flows better by removing that extra 'by')
This site le(d) me to many other sites.
From what we('ve) been told those things are all over the inside of your house
...more than they intended to tell me(.) I will always
As to how the egg had (had-delete)
Comment Written 02-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 02-Aug-2024
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Thank you Debbie. I don't normally write fiction. It's eaier not to have to use my imagination, but I appreciate you saying I have one. I also appreciate you pointing out things I've missed. That is really so helpful.
Beth
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I think your imagination is working hard even when you're writing non-fiction and certainly poetry:) You're so good you don 't even notice!
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
I've heard before that we know more about the moon and planets in our orbit than we do about the sea. It's so immense and deep!
Red with forked tails; sounds devilish!
This was a different write for you, Beth, and pretty creepy. But there's a little truth in it too - there may very well be a virus or species that has been dormant for many years and we aren't equipped to handle it when it arrives.
Nice job; good luck with this contest.
xo
Pam
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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I've heard before that we know more about the moon and planets in our orbit than we do about the sea. It's so immense and deep!
Red with forked tails; sounds devilish!
This was a different write for you, Beth, and pretty creepy. But there's a little truth in it too - there may very well be a virus or species that has been dormant for many years and we aren't equipped to handle it when it arrives.
Nice job; good luck with this contest.
xo
Pam
Comment Written 02-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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Thank you Pam, I appreciate the review. It is out of character for me but it was fun to try something a bit different.
Beth
Comment from LJbutterfly
The thing that made this story fantastic, is that it sounded so realistic and possible. You innocently saved a door stop given to your parents as a souvenir. It's placed in a fish tank of salt water and cracks. How real is that possibility in real life. The story develops into a real Sci-Fi horror. Well done. Best wishes in the contest.
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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The thing that made this story fantastic, is that it sounded so realistic and possible. You innocently saved a door stop given to your parents as a souvenir. It's placed in a fish tank of salt water and cracks. How real is that possibility in real life. The story develops into a real Sci-Fi horror. Well done. Best wishes in the contest.
Comment Written 02-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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Thank you for a great review. I almost very write fiction and much less SciFi so I pleased this piece sounded as though it could be real. I really appreciate the six stars.
Comment from karenina
Amazingly interesting, frightening, and believable story! The "trick" is I think most of us know your incredible writing about your childhood...and thus I immediately leaped into this being the most bizarre but REAL thing I've ever read...
Please know you'd have my six if I had one left on a Friday. Congratulations on such a powerful entry.
Karenina
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2024
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Amazingly interesting, frightening, and believable story! The "trick" is I think most of us know your incredible writing about your childhood...and thus I immediately leaped into this being the most bizarre but REAL thing I've ever read...
Please know you'd have my six if I had one left on a Friday. Congratulations on such a powerful entry.
Karenina
Comment Written 02-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2024
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Thank you Karenina. A lot of people thought it was a part of my story. I started writing it like I would one of my biography story not having any idea where it was headed and this is where it went . I don't write much fiction. I so please you liked it.
Beth
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Thank you Karenina. A lot of people thought it was a part of my story. I started writing it like I would one of my biography story not having any idea where it was headed and this is where it went . I don't write much fiction. I so please you liked it.
Beth