Jonathan's Story
Viewing comments for Chapter 26 "Fast forward ..."Our fostering journey with a severely disabled boy
25 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
I remember you writing about this and what timing as you all must have been exhausted during your long trip across country when this happened. It was good that you could return in time to advocate for Jonathan and trust God to choose the timing of when He would call Jonathan Home.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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I remember you writing about this and what timing as you all must have been exhausted during your long trip across country when this happened. It was good that you could return in time to advocate for Jonathan and trust God to choose the timing of when He would call Jonathan Home.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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Thanks so much Helen. Yes, it was totally exhausting. I hope you will continue to enjoy hearing his story - at least now you know some of the backstory.
Wendy
Comment from BethShelby
Yes, I do remember the posts you made last year about how worried you were and how sick he was. You also said he was a favorite patient. I you didn't mentioned him passing on I assumed he got better.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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Yes, I do remember the posts you made last year about how worried you were and how sick he was. You also said he was a favorite patient. I you didn't mentioned him passing on I assumed he got better.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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Thank you very much Beth, for a lovely review. The next chapter may also be familiar, but written differently, and then the finale.
Wendy
Comment from karenina
Wendy! I didn't think it was possible to feel any deeper than I have for you and for Jonathan. This chapter had me weeping early on and I'm undone by the sorrow that Jonathan had to go through such a frightening medical crisis.
Unspeakable that you were unable to get a staff member (Doctor?) to speak with early on. Worse that everyone in his group home was tube fed. (Rather proves your theory that it was pushed on many disabled because it pays more and is more convenient---for STAFF!
I'm seething at the inhuman response of your acquaintance:
"Well, if he was a dog ...."
Thank God for that young doctor!
(Likely new enough to medicine to retain some of his ideals and not become calloused as some do, particularly against the elderly or the disabled.)
I think of Jonathan ~ bravely battling through so many years to eke all of the joy he could out of life, with your advocacy and love!
Leaving it in God's hands, and not making the decision to make him a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) seems to me to be the most faith-filled decision!
(Sadly, I have known my share of medical staff that ignored this plea from families and did a "slow walk" to the bedside of a failing patient THEY felt was being kept alive against all logic)
God Bless you all.
Karenina
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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Wendy! I didn't think it was possible to feel any deeper than I have for you and for Jonathan. This chapter had me weeping early on and I'm undone by the sorrow that Jonathan had to go through such a frightening medical crisis.
Unspeakable that you were unable to get a staff member (Doctor?) to speak with early on. Worse that everyone in his group home was tube fed. (Rather proves your theory that it was pushed on many disabled because it pays more and is more convenient---for STAFF!
I'm seething at the inhuman response of your acquaintance:
"Well, if he was a dog ...."
Thank God for that young doctor!
(Likely new enough to medicine to retain some of his ideals and not become calloused as some do, particularly against the elderly or the disabled.)
I think of Jonathan ~ bravely battling through so many years to eke all of the joy he could out of life, with your advocacy and love!
Leaving it in God's hands, and not making the decision to make him a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) seems to me to be the most faith-filled decision!
(Sadly, I have known my share of medical staff that ignored this plea from families and did a "slow walk" to the bedside of a failing patient THEY felt was being kept alive against all logic)
God Bless you all.
Karenina
Comment Written 02-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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Thank you, Karenina, for this very beautiful review. Your reviews are always spot on in your analysis and understanding. And your constant support is so very encouraging. It has helped me greatly to just keep writing, and "let it all out". Looking back, his journey through life has been quite extraordinary. And our life has been very different from most others? lives because of him.
Thank you too for the six stars. Another HUGE encouragement. They mean more than I can adequately express, and help me to believe in myself and my writing. So, thank you again.
Wendy
Comment from royowen
I have pondered God's will for many years now, and it quite often clashes with ours, but my conclusions are that if we are indeed in the family business, we are bound, as Jesus is, to know the the Father's will, what I mean by that, is that God prepares us for management, as we allow our children to grow into adulthood, by lessening our grip on them, their environmental training is over, they 'minnieme's', we have the mind of Christ. Beautifully written Wendy, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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I have pondered God's will for many years now, and it quite often clashes with ours, but my conclusions are that if we are indeed in the family business, we are bound, as Jesus is, to know the the Father's will, what I mean by that, is that God prepares us for management, as we allow our children to grow into adulthood, by lessening our grip on them, their environmental training is over, they 'minnieme's', we have the mind of Christ. Beautifully written Wendy, blessings Roy
Comment Written 02-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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Thank you, Roy, for these thoughts, and yes, that is the goal, but His ways and will are not always clear-cut in such situations. Especially if we don?t have "our will". We just wanted God?s will, but were being asked to make decisions on His behalf. I appreciate your review. Many thanks.
Wendy
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Bless you
Comment from Jim Wile
What an impossible situation to be in, Wendy. And you don't even have the benefit of knowing what Jonathan would want in these circumstances. At least most people in your situation would know that to help guide them. I can't think of anything more awful than to be faced with these choices and decisions. If only they knew what was wrong and could give you a prognosis.
I believe his fate is in the correct hands, though, and whatever happens was probably meant to be. I just wish it weren't so painful for you who has invested so much of yourself to see that Jonathan has been able to live the best life that he possibly could.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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What an impossible situation to be in, Wendy. And you don't even have the benefit of knowing what Jonathan would want in these circumstances. At least most people in your situation would know that to help guide them. I can't think of anything more awful than to be faced with these choices and decisions. If only they knew what was wrong and could give you a prognosis.
I believe his fate is in the correct hands, though, and whatever happens was probably meant to be. I just wish it weren't so painful for you who has invested so much of yourself to see that Jonathan has been able to live the best life that he possibly could.
Comment Written 02-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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Thank you Jim. Such a compassionate and understanding review. Yes, we were totally in the dark about his diagnosis and prognosis, as also was the medical team. It was so very difficult to make a wise decision in such circumstances.
Wendy
Comment from jmdg1954
I began reading the next chapter and was puzzled as to why Jonathan was hospitalized. I went back to your portfolio and realized I missed this chapter.
What an agonizing period (as if other times weren't) and I fully understand where your minds were in thinking of Jonathan's best interest.
I'm still hung up on the he lived his entire life in pain. That's all he knew and somehow felt that was the norm.
I'll be honest, Wendy. I see people with disabilities everyday and I look at them differently. Believe me, I never looked at them mockingly, or down upon or in any negative way as I think many do. I also snap back at someone I hear use the tired "retard" in conversation.
I see the families with disabled individuals in a whole new light thanks to you story about this mighty brave young man!
Thank you for that.
John
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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I began reading the next chapter and was puzzled as to why Jonathan was hospitalized. I went back to your portfolio and realized I missed this chapter.
What an agonizing period (as if other times weren't) and I fully understand where your minds were in thinking of Jonathan's best interest.
I'm still hung up on the he lived his entire life in pain. That's all he knew and somehow felt that was the norm.
I'll be honest, Wendy. I see people with disabilities everyday and I look at them differently. Believe me, I never looked at them mockingly, or down upon or in any negative way as I think many do. I also snap back at someone I hear use the tired "retard" in conversation.
I see the families with disabled individuals in a whole new light thanks to you story about this mighty brave young man!
Thank you for that.
John
Comment Written 02-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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Thank you so very much John. What a simply wonderful review. I am so glad that your perspective has changed. You can probably see something of the person within that body they cannot control, and of the hard work and dedication of the caregiver. (Yes, when a body is twisted because of lack of normal development, there is always pain.)
If even a few people experience this, then my writing will be worthwhile. Thank you again!
Wendy
Comment from Pearl Edwards
These decisions over continuing life, but at what quality are hard enough when the other person can relay their wishes, but even harder with Jonathan . Very emotional times for you all, but you've written it well, Wendy.
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2024
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These decisions over continuing life, but at what quality are hard enough when the other person can relay their wishes, but even harder with Jonathan . Very emotional times for you all, but you've written it well, Wendy.
Comment Written 02-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2024
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Thank you so much Pearl. I value your words and support greatly.
Wendy
Comment from barbara.wilkey
My Michael was born with a congenital heart defect. He never got out of the hospital and died during heart surgery. I'm sharing this because many times a day, I prayed that God would heal my baby. One day the doctors told of Michael possibly going home but would be attached to many machines. My prayers changed. If Michael couldn't be a typical little boy, then God's will must be done. The following day, he died during surgery. I understand your choices.
Who can determine the validity or quality of anyone else's life experiences? (Only God can answer that question.)
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2024
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My Michael was born with a congenital heart defect. He never got out of the hospital and died during heart surgery. I'm sharing this because many times a day, I prayed that God would heal my baby. One day the doctors told of Michael possibly going home but would be attached to many machines. My prayers changed. If Michael couldn't be a typical little boy, then God's will must be done. The following day, he died during surgery. I understand your choices.
Who can determine the validity or quality of anyone else's life experiences? (Only God can answer that question.)
Comment Written 01-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2024
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Thank you for sharing your own personal story Barbara - that must have been so hard. Yes, it's no life to be only kept alive by machines. Only God knows what is best. Thank you very much for reviewing.
Wendy
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Wendy,
I can't imagine the emotional turmoil that you and your family went through. We can pray and pray, and at times, it just seems like God isn't giving us an answer, at least not a clear one. When that happens, we're left wondering if we should just wait or take action. It's a terrible place to be, and when it comes to a life and death decision, who has the wisdom to make such a choice? I'm looking forward to seeing the next few chapters gal. Well done. Thanks for sharing.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2024
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Hello Wendy,
I can't imagine the emotional turmoil that you and your family went through. We can pray and pray, and at times, it just seems like God isn't giving us an answer, at least not a clear one. When that happens, we're left wondering if we should just wait or take action. It's a terrible place to be, and when it comes to a life and death decision, who has the wisdom to make such a choice? I'm looking forward to seeing the next few chapters gal. Well done. Thanks for sharing.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom
Comment Written 01-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2024
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Yes, you are exactly right! An impossible choice. Thank you so much for reviewing, and for continuing to follow with interest. I appreciate your kind words very much, along with the six beautiful stars.
Wendy
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Hi Wendy,
I have not read anything previously about your foster son, nor why he ended up in the condition he was in. I do know that you are a compassionate person who has protected the life of another simply because you love him and respect his right to be alive. We certainly are not called upon to make God's judgements, and I'm glad you've pointed that out. We don't know what God has us here for, but He apparently, entrusted one young man's welfare to you.
Hugs,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2024
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Hi Wendy,
I have not read anything previously about your foster son, nor why he ended up in the condition he was in. I do know that you are a compassionate person who has protected the life of another simply because you love him and respect his right to be alive. We certainly are not called upon to make God's judgements, and I'm glad you've pointed that out. We don't know what God has us here for, but He apparently, entrusted one young man's welfare to you.
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment Written 01-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2024
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Thank you so very much for reviewing, Rhonda. I started out writing stories about our time fostering him, a severely disabled child ... and it has grown into a book; this will become Chapter 26, so we are approaching the end. It pleases me that it can still be understood as a stand-alone story, which is what I wanted. I am compiling them in my portfolio as a book called simply Jonathan's Story if you want any more detail (But don't review, as the previous ones have all expired). Thank you so much for your interest, and for your thoughtful review. Much appreciated.
Wendy
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Thank you for the info, Wendy. I?ll check it out.