Lies I used to tell Myself
Art by my granddaughter, Kenzie Jo Adams26 total reviews
Comment from karenina
Congratulations on the win, Debi! Initially, I am referring to the contest...
Much more importantly, I am referring to your victory over those who swayed you away from faith and your instinctive ability to hear God calling you back into the fold!
There are lots of folks who talk the talk...and my, how they love to chatter about the rest of us!
We're far from perfect... Lord knows we fall short, but we're trying!
Happy to be your 26th review!
All Time Best...and contest winner!
Karenina
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2023
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Congratulations on the win, Debi! Initially, I am referring to the contest...
Much more importantly, I am referring to your victory over those who swayed you away from faith and your instinctive ability to hear God calling you back into the fold!
There are lots of folks who talk the talk...and my, how they love to chatter about the rest of us!
We're far from perfect... Lord knows we fall short, but we're trying!
Happy to be your 26th review!
All Time Best...and contest winner!
Karenina
Comment Written 15-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2023
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OMGoodness girl, I didn't even realize you hadn't reviewed it.
I knew I didn't have enough for an ATB tho. So I have so many thanks to give you. I appreciate it with all my heart. Thank you for being 26, for the sweet comments and for the six stars. I thank God for you too!!
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Shhhh. I read it but kinda sorta waited to be number twenty-six!
I had "faith" it wouldn't take long!!!
Smile...
Comment from pome lover
That is lovely, Debi. You are a remarkable gal. I don't know what your prognosis is, but I sincerely hope for your recovery! It sounds like you are right with God, and strong in your faith. I know you brighten the lives of others! You brighten mine :)
Congratulations on the contest win!
Fondly,
Katharine
reply by the author on 13-Oct-2023
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That is lovely, Debi. You are a remarkable gal. I don't know what your prognosis is, but I sincerely hope for your recovery! It sounds like you are right with God, and strong in your faith. I know you brighten the lives of others! You brighten mine :)
Congratulations on the contest win!
Fondly,
Katharine
Comment Written 12-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 13-Oct-2023
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Hi Katharine. I thank you with all my heart for this wonderful review and caring for my health as well, as well as the kind comments for my story.
Once again you show what a beautiful heart you have and you have such compassion. You truly are an Earth Angel that I believe God puts in our paths at just the right time. I hope you know how much that means to me.
Thank you too for your gracious six stars, my sweet friend.
Comment from prettybluebirds
I'm so glad this story won the contest. Now it's over, I can tell you that I voted for you. I thought your story most accurately described what faith should be. Nice work.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2023
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I'm so glad this story won the contest. Now it's over, I can tell you that I voted for you. I thought your story most accurately described what faith should be. Nice work.
Comment Written 12-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2023
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Thank you so much for the vote and for the sweet things you said about my story. I appreciate it so very much, my dear friend.
I just checked and I have your birthday as April 2nd? I will be contacting you before then to see if it is ok to write you a poem and to get some info.
I hope you will allow that as they are my thank you to my special friends for all the awesome reviews you have written for me. Thanks again PBB!!
Comment from Douglas Goff
The last paragraph statement really brings this genuine piece together nicely. I really liked the realness and honesty that you presented here Debi.
Seems to me that faith may be an individual journey better taken amidst a group.
Douglas
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2023
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The last paragraph statement really brings this genuine piece together nicely. I really liked the realness and honesty that you presented here Debi.
Seems to me that faith may be an individual journey better taken amidst a group.
Douglas
Comment Written 12-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2023
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Awe, Douglas, I thank you for such kind and honest words in return to my honest words. Faith isn't always easy to be honest about because so often like me, we are not real proud of where we came from and how we viewed things back then. However, I feel that all was part of the plan. Maybe not to feel so miserable about it for years, but to someday become what God had intended. And for where I am right now in my faith and my life, I am so grateful. Thank you for being part of my journey. I am so appreciative to have a friend like you. Thank you my dear and beloved friend.
Comment from Paul Manton
Hi Debi. I've come to this a bit late, as I see you already won it! Congratulations!!! I knew a church way back which annoyed its congregation. On its huge notice board outside it put a poster: Only Sinners Welcome Here! Then another week, 'Our Church Is Filled With Sinners!' Some people complained that the minister was giving the wrong 'message', but they soon realized the truth of the words. (That church was always full.)
The self-righteous are further from the Kingdom than ever! Just look at the story of the Prodigal Son. When he came home, the real 'lost son' was his brother! So, Jesus is at pains to pull down the pride of the religious leaders and amplify the goodness of common and poor people. That's us.
Looks like your early years were very frightening - and those who presented you with a vindictive God, did you a great disservice. We both tried to let go of Him, Debi - but He will not let go of us. We are the sheep of His pasture - and He never ceases to love us.
Thank you for this honest appraisal of personal faith. I'm sure it has helped a lot of people.
Paul
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2023
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Hi Debi. I've come to this a bit late, as I see you already won it! Congratulations!!! I knew a church way back which annoyed its congregation. On its huge notice board outside it put a poster: Only Sinners Welcome Here! Then another week, 'Our Church Is Filled With Sinners!' Some people complained that the minister was giving the wrong 'message', but they soon realized the truth of the words. (That church was always full.)
The self-righteous are further from the Kingdom than ever! Just look at the story of the Prodigal Son. When he came home, the real 'lost son' was his brother! So, Jesus is at pains to pull down the pride of the religious leaders and amplify the goodness of common and poor people. That's us.
Looks like your early years were very frightening - and those who presented you with a vindictive God, did you a great disservice. We both tried to let go of Him, Debi - but He will not let go of us. We are the sheep of His pasture - and He never ceases to love us.
Thank you for this honest appraisal of personal faith. I'm sure it has helped a lot of people.
Paul
Comment Written 12-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2023
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My dearest Paul, I thank you for such kind and honest words in return to my honest words. Faith isn't always easy to be honest about because so often like me, we are not real proud of where we came from and how we viewed things back then. However, I feel that all was part of the plan. Maybe not to feel so miserable about it for years, but to someday become what God had intended. And for where I am right now in my faith and my life, I am so grateful. Thank you for being part of my journey. I am so appreciative to have a friend like you. Thank you my dear and beloved friend.
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Welcome Debi.
Have a great Friday!
Paul
Comment from Lisasview
Oh my goodness Debi... I really feel for you being brough up in such a strict environment. And, I feel for you that when you did things that you thought were bad... the guilt that you must have felt.
I remember being very worried that Jesus could see every single thing I did..I worried about that as a child quite a bit.
Being not sure of how you are feeling is only natural... it means you are thinking and that is good.
To be perfectly honest, I don't know exactly what I am feeling right now.
But then again, I am only human.
Lisa... your friend
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2023
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Oh my goodness Debi... I really feel for you being brough up in such a strict environment. And, I feel for you that when you did things that you thought were bad... the guilt that you must have felt.
I remember being very worried that Jesus could see every single thing I did..I worried about that as a child quite a bit.
Being not sure of how you are feeling is only natural... it means you are thinking and that is good.
To be perfectly honest, I don't know exactly what I am feeling right now.
But then again, I am only human.
Lisa... your friend
Comment Written 12-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2023
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Oh Lisa, you are a story within a story. I am so touched by your words and love how you added your life that was so close to mine that we could have been sisters. I loved your ending remark about your honesty of not sure you know how your feel now, as I understand. I have to work very hard at keeping my faith somedays and others it comes easy. Is it normal? I don't know. Is it human? Yes, we both know it is. You are awesome, sister. We may live so many miles apart, but I have known you forever in my heart.
I have to come to love you like you were mine. Thank you for this wonderful review and comments!!
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How sweet to read your kind words.. Gave me goosebumps ...
Religion is not a topic I get in to ...ever...
Luckily I was brought up in an open environment... I did go to church as a child... but there was no pressure to attend...
I strongly feel that being a good and honest person is what matters.
And, connecting with you on that level is so fantastic.
I know or better yet I feel you have been through a lot..
I wish you were sitting here with me now so we could share our stories...honestly...women don't always do that... such a shame...
Can I ask how old you are? Is that okay... Your photo is of such a young girl with a radiant smile...
Lisa
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Oh Sweetie, we do connect beautifully and have since almost day one. When I tried to help you adapt in the beginning, you were always open to advice from the start. And I hope you always feel the respect I have for you.
We have acquaintances here, some we really feel close to and then some that we just know will be great friends, and that is what I feel with you. You are kind and so sweet and I hope you know how special you are to me.
I am 68 years old until Thursday, the 19th and then will have one more year until I am 70. The picture in my profile is six years old and was taken in Nashville.
As a friend, I will be honest, I have aged and put on about twenty pounds since then. When I became immobile and was wheel chair bound for ten years, it did a number on me. Last year I had surgery to straighten and strengthen my legs from hips down, plus two new knees. Two months between legs. They felt they were too close together, but I knew if I didn't do them soon, I would not go back. I am still barely walking,and the lupus flares are more frequent, and is attacking the only two organs that it hadn't gotten to already, my brain and heart.
I have had 52 surgeries on joints, spine and other parts of my body. Drs call me the original bionic woman. Lol..
So I do my poetry to keep the positive energy in me, to give to others the love and kindness that gives me more positivity and try to keep all the negative out, as I take things to heart too easily. Something I never got over after molestation and rape in my childhood, which was also a daily struggle to keep it secret so the threats of the molester, my godfather wouldn't hurt my dad. I learned as a child to fear evil and now I feel I sense it so easily, even if it comes in sheep's clothing and smelling like flowers.
I also can sense a true friend like I was just saying, and I know you live with some health problems too. I am always here to help and listen. And thank you my dear friend for the offer to help, as you just did with your kind note!!! 😘 our difference in opinions of our choice of our higher power has no bearing on my caring or respect for you. None at all.
Just wanted you to know that!
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I just loved reading you email as I am about to go to sleep...
I did not know you where raped
and molested as a child... How awful..
My sister was raped twice once when she was 11 years old...
A real nightmare... but she is doing well now... she is in her early 60's.
And just got married last week... her first husband died years ago...
I am 75 years years old... the photo is just a couple of years old...
I have had a rather wonderful adult life... Except for the major accidents in the past 4 years.
I am a huge believer in eating well... I never eat meat or chicken... so my husband and I are pescatarians.
I only take something for high blood pressure and so does my husband... oh yes, he takes something for hight blood pressure... only started that two years ago... So never took anything else...drug wise...so we have been quite lucky.
We do take loads of vitamins and have for 40 years..
I am 75 years old...
I am extremely involved in doing!!
That is what gives me joy.
Hearing that you have gone through 52 surgeries... hurts my heart... I have a strong feeing that you will end up living longer than most of us.
Attitude plays such a huge part in health...
Glad you said that about the higher power because...I did feel some concern about that...
Love to you,
Lisa
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This is a wonderful statement about faith and the joy it can bring into a life. I am so happy you won the Faith contest. It is sad when a faith becomes so rigid that Christ, who loved the sinners as well as the good people, would not have been accepted as a member.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2023
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This is a wonderful statement about faith and the joy it can bring into a life. I am so happy you won the Faith contest. It is sad when a faith becomes so rigid that Christ, who loved the sinners as well as the good people, would not have been accepted as a member.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2023
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Carol, I thank you so much for such a kind and caring review and comments.
I do believe now that I am older that moderation in most of those things are fine. Obsessive behavior is bad no matter what you are doing. And LOL, I can get a little obsessed with this place, as I do love it here a lot.
Thanks also for the generous gift of six stars. I appreciate it so very much, my very dear friend.
Comment from Tom Horonzy
We heard a lesson tonight on the Christ's submission; to do not His will but the will of His father. Man is that he may have joy; women too but being humble means being grateful for any and all good things are not man made but god-given, even if we manufacture anything since our intelligence was also created by He.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2023
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We heard a lesson tonight on the Christ's submission; to do not His will but the will of His father. Man is that he may have joy; women too but being humble means being grateful for any and all good things are not man made but god-given, even if we manufacture anything since our intelligence was also created by He.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2023
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Absolutely right Tom. Y'know that is why it bothered me a little to have to admit those things about myself but it is what it is. And if I hadn't gone through all of that maybe I wouldn't be here right now. After all this is one of those God given gifts that He has given me, and that is a friendship with such wonderful people where we all celebrate each other's talents that He also gave us. Somehow it doesn't bother me to show my weaker side among all of you, because I know that most don't throw stones because who can afford the glass houses nowadays. Boy you can tell I am off when my mind says stupid things like that. Never mind me, but these new meds are making me feel a little crazy. So thanks again for the lovely review, comments and I am honored by your six stars. Tom, you are so special and that is not the treatment talking. I appreciate you so very much!!
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I rebuilding my testimony one step at a time hoping to erect a staircase tall enough to witness heaven. Not anything like Babel though.
Comment from JSD
A lovely post, Debi. Such excellent sentiments shared here, with which we can all identify. You write this feelingly and successfully. Well done and thank you for posting this.
John x
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2023
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A lovely post, Debi. Such excellent sentiments shared here, with which we can all identify. You write this feelingly and successfully. Well done and thank you for posting this.
John x
Comment Written 11-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2023
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Thanks so much, John. You are so sweet and I appreciate your awesome review and kind words. Thanks again, my dear friend.
Comment from Sanku
Faith is like a staff .It helps us to walk straight and without fumbling .It does not matter who or what we call God .The name is just an accident of our birth...
For me I know that there is a power above who is beyond
my understanding and I pray to that power.
I enjoyed reading this .May your faith be with you always...
How are you keeping ,Debi?.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2023
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Faith is like a staff .It helps us to walk straight and without fumbling .It does not matter who or what we call God .The name is just an accident of our birth...
For me I know that there is a power above who is beyond
my understanding and I pray to that power.
I enjoyed reading this .May your faith be with you always...
How are you keeping ,Debi?.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2023
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When you go through treatment and AA you call it your higher power, and what a higher power it is. I have been saved many times by that power. And prayer has helped every time. I am proud to say that I am saved by Jesus.
But that is what keeps me going, because I believe Jesus died for me.
Thanks my sweet friend for always caring and for keeping the faith yourself
And I love your faith. It is so very clear how you express yourself. Thank you for everything ....... love ya my sweet friend. I am just waiting to see if the treatments are helping,