Heart Crafted Poems - 2022
Viewing comments for Chapter 74 "To Err or not to err ..."Musings of an old man - 2022
24 total reviews
Comment from karenina
First Please edit your first line in your authors' comments to read 2022, rather than 2020!
Second -Is it me, or is this fine Shakespearean Sonnet with the prim and proper words a bit of sardonic skewering of the entire process of reviewing one another's work?
A quite good-natured plea to walk softly in the garden of another's words???
Props for calling "oppugned" out of retirement! (I'm joshing!)
Great sonnet! You are positively afflicted with the iambic pentameter bug-- for which there is no cure!!
Great envoi, btw!
"tit for tat"
Indeed!
Karenina
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2022
  |
First Please edit your first line in your authors' comments to read 2022, rather than 2020!
Second -Is it me, or is this fine Shakespearean Sonnet with the prim and proper words a bit of sardonic skewering of the entire process of reviewing one another's work?
A quite good-natured plea to walk softly in the garden of another's words???
Props for calling "oppugned" out of retirement! (I'm joshing!)
Great sonnet! You are positively afflicted with the iambic pentameter bug-- for which there is no cure!!
Great envoi, btw!
"tit for tat"
Indeed!
Karenina
Comment Written 28-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2022
-
Karenina, abundant smiles, and the goof on the year is a great example of my state of mind ... We are moving, new home construction is delayed 2-3 weeks - So the sonnet is a personal reminder NOT to judge the project or tradesmen involved that has created this delay. All Smiles, rainbows, and lollipops- or I am faking it til I can make it.
Comment from nomi338
Being imperfect we cannot avoid sinning. Any man who thinks he has not sinned, is only lying or deluding himself. We all need forgiving and as such need to be forgiving. If you are unwilling to forgive the error of another, your error will not be forgiven by the one who has the power and the right to forgive.
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2022
|
Being imperfect we cannot avoid sinning. Any man who thinks he has not sinned, is only lying or deluding himself. We all need forgiving and as such need to be forgiving. If you are unwilling to forgive the error of another, your error will not be forgiven by the one who has the power and the right to forgive.
Comment Written 27-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2022
-
Thank you! Nomi, we sold our home and are moving. New home construction is delayed 2-3 weeks, so the sonnet is a personal reminder NOT to judge the project or tradesmen involved that have created this delay. All Smiles, rainbows, and lollipops- or I am faking it til I can make it.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A clever and unusual sonnet and I love the words choice, the metre and the sentiment here. You are becoming quite the sonneteer Jim and you have mastered the metre and there is no stopping you now, a joy to read, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2022
 |
A clever and unusual sonnet and I love the words choice, the metre and the sentiment here. You are becoming quite the sonneteer Jim and you have mastered the metre and there is no stopping you now, a joy to read, love Dolly x
Comment Written 27-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2022
-
This breakthrough is nothing short of miraculous, and a direct example of the supportive and patient efforts of those like you, Panygnt, and many others have provided me. I am profoundly grateful to have this personal milestone reached.
Comment from Janet Foor
I love sonnets but I haven't written one in a while. This being your third is very impressive as is the language. Excellent rhyme and meter. Very nicely done.
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2022
|
I love sonnets but I haven't written one in a while. This being your third is very impressive as is the language. Excellent rhyme and meter. Very nicely done.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 27-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2022
-
Janet, thank you for your fantastic validation, This breakthrough is nothing short of miraculous and a direct example of the supportive and patient efforts of those like you, Panygnt, and many others have provided me.
Comment from rspoet
Hello JLR,
This is an excellent sonnet, especially as it is only your third attempt.
The alternate rhyming is very good, as is the couplet.
The Iambic pentameter is solid with only a few breaks
(such as the last line where "judge", a stressed word, is in an unstressed position), but, of course, to err is human.
The Volta turn in stanza three works well, and the couplet reflects back on the theme nicely.
Overall, very well done. I enjoyed reading it.
Best wishes.
Robert
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2022
|
Hello JLR,
This is an excellent sonnet, especially as it is only your third attempt.
The alternate rhyming is very good, as is the couplet.
The Iambic pentameter is solid with only a few breaks
(such as the last line where "judge", a stressed word, is in an unstressed position), but, of course, to err is human.
The Volta turn in stanza three works well, and the couplet reflects back on the theme nicely.
Overall, very well done. I enjoyed reading it.
Best wishes.
Robert
Comment Written 27-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2022
-
Thank you Robert for your thoughtful review.
Comment from GWHARGIS
I'll admit I had to read this twice, was still focusing on the language then read your author notes and read it a third time. Much clearer. And yes, I failed literature while we were reading Shelley and Keats. Lol. This was an old fashioned poem that covers today's poems very well. I got the feeling that thos was about a bad review. If not, maybe I was relating to something that recently happened to me. Anyhow, it was beautifully written and if this was getting told off in the old days I prefer this.
Gretchen
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2022
|
I'll admit I had to read this twice, was still focusing on the language then read your author notes and read it a third time. Much clearer. And yes, I failed literature while we were reading Shelley and Keats. Lol. This was an old fashioned poem that covers today's poems very well. I got the feeling that thos was about a bad review. If not, maybe I was relating to something that recently happened to me. Anyhow, it was beautifully written and if this was getting told off in the old days I prefer this.
Gretchen
Comment Written 27-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2022
-
Gretchen, smiling back! Yes, I would prefer the old considerations of times gone by. We seem to be caught up in a world of knee jerk judgement about just about everything these days.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
I liked the sound of your sonnet when read aloud, JLR. The
opening lines clearly define the theme. The unusual words
were suited for your topic. You expressed your thoughts and
feelings well. The flow was smooth with good rhymes and great
imagery. The artwork was perfect. You gave readers much to
think about in their own lives about judging or being judged.
Thanks for sharing, Jan
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2022
|
I liked the sound of your sonnet when read aloud, JLR. The
opening lines clearly define the theme. The unusual words
were suited for your topic. You expressed your thoughts and
feelings well. The flow was smooth with good rhymes and great
imagery. The artwork was perfect. You gave readers much to
think about in their own lives about judging or being judged.
Thanks for sharing, Jan
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2022
-
Jan thank you very much for your consistently supportive comments.
Comment from Eternal Muse
I like the archaic feeling of this and your font.
A very fine humor makes it amusing. Excellent imagery, visuals and presentation.
Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2022
|
I like the archaic feeling of this and your font.
A very fine humor makes it amusing. Excellent imagery, visuals and presentation.
Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2022
-
Thank you!
Comment from Frank Malley
"To Err or not to err..." is a poem, a sonnet, that wishes to ask profound questions. The transformed line from Hamlet is a clever introduction to the question the poem asks, but is the question itself ever clearly asked? Even given the author's notes, "the question" remains slippery. Perhaps such a question must remain so, but the terms on the discussion could be made more clearly. I think the poet's fascination with diction that makes the riddles of words more important than riddles of meaning. There is a point in one's learning of a language at which his or her understanding of the language becomes encaged by subjective understandings of word meanings. Hamlet asks the ultimate existential question via images and examples; I think this poet would be wise to consider the same tactic.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2022
 |
"To Err or not to err..." is a poem, a sonnet, that wishes to ask profound questions. The transformed line from Hamlet is a clever introduction to the question the poem asks, but is the question itself ever clearly asked? Even given the author's notes, "the question" remains slippery. Perhaps such a question must remain so, but the terms on the discussion could be made more clearly. I think the poet's fascination with diction that makes the riddles of words more important than riddles of meaning. There is a point in one's learning of a language at which his or her understanding of the language becomes encaged by subjective understandings of word meanings. Hamlet asks the ultimate existential question via images and examples; I think this poet would be wise to consider the same tactic.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2022
-
Thank you sir!
-
All the best, JLR. Frank
Comment from Wendy G
The language is a bit archaic for me - but the theme is an important one, and that comes across well. Ultimately because of man's subjectivity and human frailty we are best to leave judgement in God's hands. He will never err, and if we leave such matters with Him we will err less often.
Wendy
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2022
|
The language is a bit archaic for me - but the theme is an important one, and that comes across well. Ultimately because of man's subjectivity and human frailty we are best to leave judgement in God's hands. He will never err, and if we leave such matters with Him we will err less often.
Wendy
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2022
-
Thanks for affirming my effort in this. Your validation is most appreciated.