Lips
Invitation to a Retirement Party42 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
Jay,
This is an interesting story. Both have some major psychological problems here. She put herself in mortal danger to interview this killer of young girls. He couldn't help himself. Now both will be in the hospital and maybe die. Hopefully Jeffery will live and be put in jail so the families of the 103 girls see him punished. I still think this will be a popular vodcast.
Congrats of the honorable mention in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2021
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Jay,
This is an interesting story. Both have some major psychological problems here. She put herself in mortal danger to interview this killer of young girls. He couldn't help himself. Now both will be in the hospital and maybe die. Hopefully Jeffery will live and be put in jail so the families of the 103 girls see him punished. I still think this will be a popular vodcast.
Congrats of the honorable mention in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
Comment Written 30-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2021
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Hi, Joan. Wow, you had to dig deep to get your 2 cents. And it wasn't even a short one. I'm so very appreciative, though, Joan. Really! Each one of these is my baby. And I still go all weak when someone says he has his daddy's eyes, good looks, or even his persistence.
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You are most kindly welcome, Jay.
Joan
Comment from tfawcus
It seems that this has ended in a draw! The tension builds beautifully throughout the piece, leading us to an inevitably bloody ending, but not quite the one I was led to suspect. The most macabre aspect is the technical ability to reach hundreds of thousands of people through social media in this way. No wonder society is a bit mixed up these days. Perhaps it's always been mixed up but never this publically.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2021
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It seems that this has ended in a draw! The tension builds beautifully throughout the piece, leading us to an inevitably bloody ending, but not quite the one I was led to suspect. The most macabre aspect is the technical ability to reach hundreds of thousands of people through social media in this way. No wonder society is a bit mixed up these days. Perhaps it's always been mixed up but never this publically.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2021
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Thank you, Tony for your thoughtful review and for the six. You were able to keep one past the weekend. My gain. Thanks. Yours was the only one to mention the social media aspect of this story. It is a story of grappling egos, but on a ginormous stage. Neither got what he/she wanted. The audience was the only winner ... if self-gratification can be considered winning.
Again, thank you for your astuteness.
Comment from pome lover
Well, Jay, that was some story.
From your warning about the video, I decided to skip it. (too much horror on the news - don't need any more tonight.)
So you decided to leave us hanging. Well, I have to say, she was such a long-winded big mouth, I honestly don't care if he gets her or not, though he should, of course be stopped. She was either very brave or very stupid. bet she didn't have a gun, either. But, regarding your writing, it is good, as usual - teasing the reader, who expects him to attack her while she is involved with her camera. Then, the unexpected scene where she butts him in the nose. So the reader is imagining revenge, but he chuckles as they hear help arriving. He reminds me of Hannibal (Lector?) I wouldn't count him out.
Your imagination is always intriguing - very far ranging - many different kinds of people and plots. This one surprised me.
Now I fear it is I who am being long winded. sorry.
congrats on All time Best.
Katharine
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Well, Jay, that was some story.
From your warning about the video, I decided to skip it. (too much horror on the news - don't need any more tonight.)
So you decided to leave us hanging. Well, I have to say, she was such a long-winded big mouth, I honestly don't care if he gets her or not, though he should, of course be stopped. She was either very brave or very stupid. bet she didn't have a gun, either. But, regarding your writing, it is good, as usual - teasing the reader, who expects him to attack her while she is involved with her camera. Then, the unexpected scene where she butts him in the nose. So the reader is imagining revenge, but he chuckles as they hear help arriving. He reminds me of Hannibal (Lector?) I wouldn't count him out.
Your imagination is always intriguing - very far ranging - many different kinds of people and plots. This one surprised me.
Now I fear it is I who am being long winded. sorry.
congrats on All time Best.
Katharine
Comment Written 26-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Haha. We are all heir to longwindedness. Sometimes, when I'm afraid I can't eke out the required 2/12 to 3 lines in a review, I end up going 40 lines. What I really wanted to show was the clash of two warring egos ... and at the end, of course, neither one got his/her prize, or in his case ... trophy.
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I am being? who is being? heavens!
Comment from Mary Vigasin
Brilliant. I expected a much different (that is the way it always ends) story where she becomes a victim.
A chilling story, you keep peeling back the layers of each character to keep your reader engaged.
I enjoyed the read.
Regards,
Mary
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Brilliant. I expected a much different (that is the way it always ends) story where she becomes a victim.
A chilling story, you keep peeling back the layers of each character to keep your reader engaged.
I enjoyed the read.
Regards,
Mary
Comment Written 26-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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So kind, Mary. Thank you for reading it. I'm glad you found it enjoyable, albeit a tad dark. But 'tis the season! I appreciate your engagement.
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Chilling, with a female not afraid to fire off her mouth. Flows well. The serial killer dimension adds another layer. Risky for her to push as hard as she does to get the story. Interesting throughout.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Chilling, with a female not afraid to fire off her mouth. Flows well. The serial killer dimension adds another layer. Risky for her to push as hard as she does to get the story. Interesting throughout.
Comment Written 26-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Thank you, Brett. As it turned out, each one got his/her reward, only not as good as each one thought it could have been.
Comment from Spitfire
Hi again, Jay. I'm back on. What an interesting story. I sure didn't expect Miss Potty Mouth to bonk Jeffrey's in the head.
If you ask me, she has a big ego too!
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Hi again, Jay. I'm back on. What an interesting story. I sure didn't expect Miss Potty Mouth to bonk Jeffrey's in the head.
If you ask me, she has a big ego too!
Comment Written 26-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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So good to have you back, Shari. I was just thinking about you the other day, wondering how you're getting along without your husband as such a longtime companion. I was sorry to hear about your losing him.
Thanks for reading "Lips". It was rather macabre for all the kiddies on Halloween.
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I 'm just thankful Frank passed before the pandemic shut us it!
Comment from Sherry Asbury
This is chillingly wonderful. Some bit of a look into why they kill. But no matter how deep the interview goes, there is still more that we will never know, Great story that I really enjoyed.
t
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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This is chillingly wonderful. Some bit of a look into why they kill. But no matter how deep the interview goes, there is still more that we will never know, Great story that I really enjoyed.
t
Comment Written 26-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Thank you so much, Sherry. I like your "chillingly wonderful." I'm glad you found it enjoyable.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Wow, this is a creepy story. Don't know who is creepier, him as a serial killer or her as someone so determined to get a story she risks her life. This should have a good chance at winning.
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2021
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Wow, this is a creepy story. Don't know who is creepier, him as a serial killer or her as someone so determined to get a story she risks her life. This should have a good chance at winning.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2021
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Thank you, Carol. I'm happy you enjoyed reading this. He is creepier. I appreciate the well-wishes, but I don't think this is cute enough for a Halloween winner.
Comment from Theodore McDowell
You are one hell of a writer, Jay. This is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your writing flows so well and is perfectly crafted. YOu kept me engrossed throughout the story. Spellbound!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm in awe.
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2021
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You are one hell of a writer, Jay. This is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your writing flows so well and is perfectly crafted. YOu kept me engrossed throughout the story. Spellbound!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm in awe.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2021
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Thank you, Tim. I appreciate your confidence in me. I'm happy you enjoyed it. Your 6 stars was a bonus!
Comment from BethShelby
This is a very chilling story. I was afraid this man was going to take advantage of the reporter being attracted to him. What she did didn't seem like something that was planned. I can't imagine why she didn't realize she was taking a chance without having an escape plan for herself. I did watch the video you provided and see how that could be a catalyst for this story. Reporters take a big chance just to get a super story. It often backfires. It is a great story for the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2021
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This is a very chilling story. I was afraid this man was going to take advantage of the reporter being attracted to him. What she did didn't seem like something that was planned. I can't imagine why she didn't realize she was taking a chance without having an escape plan for herself. I did watch the video you provided and see how that could be a catalyst for this story. Reporters take a big chance just to get a super story. It often backfires. It is a great story for the contest.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2021
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Thank you, Beth. This was a study in egos, each of which was devouring. I'm so happy you enjoyed it.