Comment from barkingdog

Excellent

The swallows are so playful in the first four lines and then the hunter hawks surf the skies and the silly games end.
Wonderful movement/ descriptive alliteration: Wending wheeling twirl and tag; Tumbling turning flutt'rings flight; cluttering clowns pluck their plight

Best of luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Aug-2015

Thanks, for this wonderful review and comments,

Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin

Excellent

Hi...

_ This is a great alliteration poem.
_ Nice and easy flowing to read.
_ Excellent entry for the contest.
_ Good luck.

Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*:*)

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Aug-2015

Thanks Jackie, for this wonderful review and comments,

Comment from Jeanie Mercer

Excellent

The form, syllable count, alliteration and rhymes are done exactly according to contest rules in this "rhyming alliterisen." The presentation is very nice. Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Aug-2015

Thanks Jeannie, for this wonderful review and comments,

Comment from Annette Gulliver

Excellent

This verse fills the criteria for the contest.
Good use of rhyming.
Descriptive verse which compliments the artwork
Good luck in the contest.
Annette

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Aug-2015

Thanks Annette, for this wonderful review and comments,

Comment from Eric1

Excellent

Hi Mystery author, this is an excellent entry for this particular competition, Brilliant alliteration that makes the reader go along at a fair old pace, one of the best I have reviewed! I truly wish you the best of luck in the contest my friend.

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Aug-2015

Thanks Eric, for this wonderful review and comments,

reply by Eric1 on 14-Aug-2015

You are very welcome my friend.

Comment from Pam (respa)

Excellent

-Excellent photo for your poem.
-You follow all the requirements very well.
-The imagery is vivid and the reader can picture what is going on.
-I like line two with 'twirl and tag'.

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Aug-2015

Thanks, for this wonderful review and comments,

reply by Pam (respa) on 14-Aug-2015

You are very welcome.

Comment from seaglass

Excellent

This is a fun, playful poem describing swallows. They are interesting birds to watch. I have watched them chase large birds from their areas and dive bomb humans they perceived to be threat. I'm sure this will do well in the contest.

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Aug-2015

Thanks, for this wonderful review and comments,

Comment from EricBrady

Excellent

Wonderful piece. It is kind of comical envisioning all of the swallows of the first four lines and then the dramatic effect comes in with the hawk on the hunt. You create an amazing mental picture though your words. Well done!

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Aug-2015

Thanks Eric for the wonderful review.

Comment from LIJ Red

Excellent

This by it's very nature cannot be a natural read, but you did an excellent job in trying, and hit the prompt squarely. The jays and threshers sometimes gang up and give a hawk a bad time. I wonder if swallows do...

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Aug-2015

Thanks Red, for this wonderful review and comments,

Comment from XGoneX

Excellent

Wow.
Great job done here.
You managed to follow the rules when it comes to the lines, syllable count and a great alliteration scheme.
This is a very challenging contest and I think you did very well.
Good luck.

 Comment Written 13-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Aug-2015

Thanks Jade, for this wonderful review and comments,