Comment from Acquired Taste

Excellent

Intense and definitely tinged with horror - okay, covered in horror!

I like how it flows very easily from stanza to stanza each time opening a new idea and never giving you a breath. I particularly like the line: I am the peacefulness that lied.

That is a stab in your heart to know your choice was so wrong. I enjoyed this. AT=/

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2014

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2014

Thanks so much for your kind review, Jean. I appreciate it.

Comment from TOMORAL

Excellent

What a terrific, horrific, horror poem. One worthy of a win no doubt. This is a chiller thriller to the bone. Good luck with this well defined horror story.

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2014

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2014

Thanks you very much for your kind review, TOMORAL. I truly appreciate it.

Comment from kiwijenny

Excellent

Oooooooooo well done...scary ....especially last lines....I am the peacefulness that lied....ooooooo I like that
Yet most known me as suicide.......should that be know?
Well done
God bless

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2014

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2014

Thanks for the excellent review, kiwijenny. I really appreciate it.

Comment from Erik McGinley

Excellent

The last line seems wrong. Did you mean know?

I do, generally, like the poem, but I think you made a mistake labeling the previous stanzas as suicide.

They really go all over the board, quite effectively. I'd say a better ending would be one that left the reader to react their own interpretation rather than boxing them in to yours.

For starters, people who are truly suicidal do not fear it, they desire it.

Beyond that, it's just easier to get the reader to agree with you if you let them define their own fear.

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2014

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2014

Thanks, Erik, and I appreciate your opinions on the poem.

Comment from Andrewajgblue

Exceptional

Terrifying , but so creative I loved the fact it was rhyming couplets it worked really well for this piece, and the story was so creative, with a killer last line ( great pun there I thought, quite proud) good luck in the competition, this is the winner for me worth every star :)
Andrew

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2014

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2014

Thanks for such an engaging and enthusiastic review, Andrew. I truly appreciate it, and the six star rating as well.

Comment from acerisestory

Exceptional

Yikes! Yikes! Yikes! You've woven a gory, scary tale! The surprise at the end is, I suppose, really no surprise.

This is well written. The imagery is wonderfully done. Your aabb rhyme is perfect.

Good luck in the contest. You are a contender! Alana

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2014

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2014

Thanks, acerisestory. I appreciate your very kind comment, enthusiasm, and six star rating very much!

reply by acerisestory on 27-Jul-2014

You are welcome! Alana

Comment from Dorothy Farrell

Excellent

OMG - They don't come more horrific than this - real life horror. It takes a certain type of poet whose forté is horror to write like this. Very well done with a shock ending. Good luck in the contest. Regards Dorothy

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2014

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2014

Hah, well, apparently my competitors are far more horrific than my entry is. I am getting killed in the contest, so there is that. However, I appreciate your kind review all the same.

Comment from Janet Foor

Excellent

My Ceremony is indeed graphic and horrific poem fitting the contest qualifications. The artwork you chose enhances your well written piece. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2014

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2014

Thanks for the very kind review, Jmf4119.

Comment from lancellot

Excellent

Very creative, my friend. You truly know how to dip into darkness. This has a slight philosophical tint with the subject being suicide. it reminds that taking your own life is also a sin and leads to hell as well. Well done.

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2014

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2014

Thanks, Lance, but I apparently didn't dip as deeply as my competitors in this particular contest. But I really appreciate you kind comments and review all the same.

Comment from lindalcreel

Excellent

This was an exceptional tale of horror. Pity you couldn't play the song "In the Arms of the Angels" by Sarah McLaughlin. That would have really set the tone. Of course, I'm not sure how that works in a contest entry, but best of luck to you.

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2014

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2014

I could play the song with the poem, Linda, but I'm afraid people would complain. Thanks for the very nice review.

reply by lindalcreel on 27-Jul-2014

You're welcome:)