I Hereby Crown Thee ...
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "A Dream of Droll Dichotomy's Design"A collection of crowns of sonnets
74 total reviews
Comment from june bug
Wow! Good things can harm and bad can be beautiful. I believe you have captured it here quite well. This was so many thoughts and images coming at me all at once. The final line gave me the biggest chill. Great job on this. All the best to you.
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2012
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Wow! Good things can harm and bad can be beautiful. I believe you have captured it here quite well. This was so many thoughts and images coming at me all at once. The final line gave me the biggest chill. Great job on this. All the best to you.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2012
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Thank you, June :-). I'm glad the theme worked for you, and you enjoyed the read.
Mike
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You are welcome. Best regards.
Comment from Sasha
Yes, this is long, but worth the read. This is beautiful and I enjoyed it very much. As you know I flunked poetic rules and can only comment on what it made me feel. This is an excellent entry for this contest and I sincerely wish you all the best.
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2012
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Yes, this is long, but worth the read. This is beautiful and I enjoyed it very much. As you know I flunked poetic rules and can only comment on what it made me feel. This is an excellent entry for this contest and I sincerely wish you all the best.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2012
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Thank you so much, my friend :-). I wasn;t sure I'd get this done when the deadline was looming, but then it all came pouring out over the course of a train ride.
Mike
Comment from cvcopac
I love the sonnet and no one does it more justice than you. Great original imagery (thank someone for 'Webster') I got a chuckle reading through the 4th sonnet, 4th quatrain. Good argument. You have some heavy competition in this contest: good luck
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2012
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I love the sonnet and no one does it more justice than you. Great original imagery (thank someone for 'Webster') I got a chuckle reading through the 4th sonnet, 4th quatrain. Good argument. You have some heavy competition in this contest: good luck
Comment Written 13-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2012
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Thanks so much for this great review and special rating :-). Sorry it took me a while to get back to you.
Mike
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That's ok; after writing one of those babies you probably need a vacation.
Comment from WLHall
Now you have really amazed me, Mike. I will be honest and say I didn't quite understand all the words and what they meant, but I honestly tried my best. And you explained it well in your author's notes about it being a culmination of prior themes. It's just your talent for putting together something in this magnitude that awes me. Such flow and eloquence. I'm sure yours will be a great contender.
Wanda
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2012
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Now you have really amazed me, Mike. I will be honest and say I didn't quite understand all the words and what they meant, but I honestly tried my best. And you explained it well in your author's notes about it being a culmination of prior themes. It's just your talent for putting together something in this magnitude that awes me. Such flow and eloquence. I'm sure yours will be a great contender.
Wanda
Comment Written 13-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2012
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Thank you, Wanda - I'm so happy you enjoyed this one :-). Apologies for the slow reply. Too many reviews to answer!
Mike
Comment from jshep
Hello, Mike. A herculean task, I know, and you have truly done it justice, especially with your rich use of language. I totally expected an aspect of darkness from your pen and you have not disappointed. I will just go forward with my observations and comments:
beyond an ooze that yearns to seize the day (day and tourniquets do not rhyme in yankee land) :)
There's only bafflement, agony-bought - meter is off IMHO- or what Ray would say the dadums.
I- There is no peace for (from ??) angels formed in thought- a favorite line. well done.
Also: only death exists to quell the storm- so true for too many.
II- They tease us from the skies- loved it
You (your) article of words
contrasts hide connections unresolved
Reality is perfectly uncouth- fabulous lines.
dreams and danger in the seams being suffocated - so profound and creative.
IV - such depth of reality in this particular sonnet - hope heading for the future, sacrifices for good while our faces are shadowed in a hood- great imagery.
V- a firewall, built against all questions gaze 11 syllables
in financial domiinion 'cross the earth- meter off IMHO.
in finNAN- WRONG EMPHASIS
VII- what a perfect ending line within the darkness and light of this poem, MIke. that sometimes evil dwells behind the light. Wow.
Bravo on your achievement and a solid contender from your creative hand. Best of luck. Joyce
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2012
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Hello, Mike. A herculean task, I know, and you have truly done it justice, especially with your rich use of language. I totally expected an aspect of darkness from your pen and you have not disappointed. I will just go forward with my observations and comments:
beyond an ooze that yearns to seize the day (day and tourniquets do not rhyme in yankee land) :)
There's only bafflement, agony-bought - meter is off IMHO- or what Ray would say the dadums.
I- There is no peace for (from ??) angels formed in thought- a favorite line. well done.
Also: only death exists to quell the storm- so true for too many.
II- They tease us from the skies- loved it
You (your) article of words
contrasts hide connections unresolved
Reality is perfectly uncouth- fabulous lines.
dreams and danger in the seams being suffocated - so profound and creative.
IV - such depth of reality in this particular sonnet - hope heading for the future, sacrifices for good while our faces are shadowed in a hood- great imagery.
V- a firewall, built against all questions gaze 11 syllables
in financial domiinion 'cross the earth- meter off IMHO.
in finNAN- WRONG EMPHASIS
VII- what a perfect ending line within the darkness and light of this poem, MIke. that sometimes evil dwells behind the light. Wow.
Bravo on your achievement and a solid contender from your creative hand. Best of luck. Joyce
Comment Written 13-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2012
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Thanks so much for the pointers and encouragement, Joyce :-). Sorry I've been slow to reply - every time I answered some reviews, more kept coming in, and the site obviously presents the newest first!
Mike
Comment from patsypats
It is quite lengthy, but you keep have captured the readers attention with your descriptive word choices and how they display such fine imagery. Your rhyming scheme is excellent and this always gives a writing good unique character. So no matter how long, what you style may be, if you captivate your readers then you've succeeded.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
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It is quite lengthy, but you keep have captured the readers attention with your descriptive word choices and how they display such fine imagery. Your rhyming scheme is excellent and this always gives a writing good unique character. So no matter how long, what you style may be, if you captivate your readers then you've succeeded.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
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Thank you so much, Patsy - if I can entertain, then I've succeeded. I'm so glad you liked it :-).
Mike
Comment from Anisa-
I really can't comment on whether or not the rules were followed, and for that reason I won't be voting either.
However, I did really enjoy this poem. I just don't if it's technically correct! Lol.
It would be so difficult to keep that kind of language up for so long! But you managed. Great job. Good story and, to me, it flowed well.
Best of luck in the contest!
Anisa
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
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I really can't comment on whether or not the rules were followed, and for that reason I won't be voting either.
However, I did really enjoy this poem. I just don't if it's technically correct! Lol.
It would be so difficult to keep that kind of language up for so long! But you managed. Great job. Good story and, to me, it flowed well.
Best of luck in the contest!
Anisa
Comment Written 13-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
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Thank you, Anisa. The rules are a little mind-boggling on this one, but I think I'm compliant (after a few pointers from Adewpearl and her eagle eye!).
Mike
Comment from Rattler
I'm no poet I can see that from reading your poem. I still have to give you a 5 because I'm all out of 6 stars.
Very well done.
Thanks for sharing and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
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I'm no poet I can see that from reading your poem. I still have to give you a 5 because I'm all out of 6 stars.
Very well done.
Thanks for sharing and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
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Thanks so much, Rattler - I'm really glad you enjoyed it, and appreciate the encouraging comments.
Mike
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I do so wish I had a 6 to give you for this absolute work of art. It might be long, as you said, but it needed to be to get the story in properly. I love the way you have used the ABAB rhyme scheme, the flow and the rhythm are great. I love the way of this poem, beginning the following sentence with the end of the stanza before, and as you say, rounding the last line off with the very first line. The poem itself, as I said at the start is excellent, though I have to admit that I had to get the dictionary out to find out what, 'sololquies' meant, once that was understood, the poem read really well and in all it was really written . I think you have chosen an absolutely stunning picture for your work. Well done!!xsx
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
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I do so wish I had a 6 to give you for this absolute work of art. It might be long, as you said, but it needed to be to get the story in properly. I love the way you have used the ABAB rhyme scheme, the flow and the rhythm are great. I love the way of this poem, beginning the following sentence with the end of the stanza before, and as you say, rounding the last line off with the very first line. The poem itself, as I said at the start is excellent, though I have to admit that I had to get the dictionary out to find out what, 'sololquies' meant, once that was understood, the poem read really well and in all it was really written . I think you have chosen an absolutely stunning picture for your work. Well done!!xsx
Comment Written 13-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
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Thanks so much, Sandra :-). I do have a habit of dropping big words in - I love fitting them into the meter, although I have been accused of being too obscure in the past! I'm so glad you enjoyed it :-).
Mike
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You are so welcome! xsx
Comment from TammyGail
Mike this was loveliness
I couldn't write something like this
The flow and beat throughout is stellar
But most its your creativity each word placed with care
This damn thing won't let me give you a six but you have my vote
I'll be checking the booths
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
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Mike this was loveliness
I couldn't write something like this
The flow and beat throughout is stellar
But most its your creativity each word placed with care
This damn thing won't let me give you a six but you have my vote
I'll be checking the booths
Comment Written 13-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
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Thank you so much, Tammy :-). This form is a real headache-inducer, but it feels like you've achieved something when it's finished!
Mike