Along the Jericho Road
Viewing comments for Chapter 32 "Iyaope Moon"Murder Mystery
52 total reviews
Comment from barkingdog
Hi Bev,
I hope the fight between the two brothers furthers you plot somehow, but at this point it seems more a distraction. For him to be there when he takes the call is fine but, I don't know, it seems a bit long unless your introducing new characters. I'll take it that you are. It's very descriptive and well written because I see them and Lynn.
The story seemed to continue from your intro at the point where they found another body. This one on tribal land. And keeping things secretive because of Buell, again mentioned in your intro. I don't understand though why he wants to keep Jana out of it because I don't see how Uncle Tony fits into all of this. (I will admit that I've forgotten who Tony is. My bad memory. I went to the author notes and didn't find his name.)
I'm really a bad reviewer for you today. Sorry.
All in all another fine post.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
  |
Hi Bev,
I hope the fight between the two brothers furthers you plot somehow, but at this point it seems more a distraction. For him to be there when he takes the call is fine but, I don't know, it seems a bit long unless your introducing new characters. I'll take it that you are. It's very descriptive and well written because I see them and Lynn.
The story seemed to continue from your intro at the point where they found another body. This one on tribal land. And keeping things secretive because of Buell, again mentioned in your intro. I don't understand though why he wants to keep Jana out of it because I don't see how Uncle Tony fits into all of this. (I will admit that I've forgotten who Tony is. My bad memory. I went to the author notes and didn't find his name.)
I'm really a bad reviewer for you today. Sorry.
All in all another fine post.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
-
Thanks for your insights and suggestions, Ellen. I appreciate the amount of time you took with this review. :0) Bev
Comment from lakeport
lyaope Moon indeed now there is a big reward to find the father,and solve the mystery. I enjoyed reading the story,
God bless you.lakeport
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
 |
lyaope Moon indeed now there is a big reward to find the father,and solve the mystery. I enjoyed reading the story,
God bless you.lakeport
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
-
Thank so much, lakeport. I appreciate the time you took to review and your generosity. Warmest regards, Bev
-
your welcome.
Could you please reciew my poem " Lady Liberty"
Thank you.Lakeport.
-
your welcome Bev, Hugs!Lakeport,
Comment from irishauthorme
This is a great story, and very tight writing. I will go back and read your previous chapters. Read some a while back but had computer blow-up and have been off-line for two months. Just enough Sioux language to give authority to your story, and good action and tension. Your dialogue is short and direct, just as it would have been spoken.
Good work, irish
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
|
This is a great story, and very tight writing. I will go back and read your previous chapters. Read some a while back but had computer blow-up and have been off-line for two months. Just enough Sioux language to give authority to your story, and good action and tension. Your dialogue is short and direct, just as it would have been spoken.
Good work, irish
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
-
Hi, Irish. Thank you for your uplifting review! I appreciate that you took time to read my chapter and your very generous rating. Kindest regards, Bev
Comment from barbara.wilkey
You did a good job with this post. I enjoyed reading it.
Ty picked up the shovel and put it into the shed. (I stumlbed a littl over this sentence, maybe 'shovel and set it inside the shed.' What do you think?)
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
|
You did a good job with this post. I enjoyed reading it.
Ty picked up the shovel and put it into the shed. (I stumlbed a littl over this sentence, maybe 'shovel and set it inside the shed.' What do you think?)
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
-
Yup, sounds good to me, barbara. Thanks for the help and gracous review. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Rondeno
Hi, Bev!
I love this. Where do you get the Sioux vocabulary? You're not of indian ethnicity, are you? How cool would that be? It's a great read, and I'm eager for more.
Mike xxx
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
|
Hi, Bev!
I love this. Where do you get the Sioux vocabulary? You're not of indian ethnicity, are you? How cool would that be? It's a great read, and I'm eager for more.
Mike xxx
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
-
I'm not Sioux, but I do have an Indian connection. Somehow, I've always loved the Sioux mythology and world view the most. Thanks so much, Michael. I appreciate the generous and encouraging review -- I'm guessing a past life. Hugs, Bev
Comment from robina1978
I think the police is very right, offering money for tips is not always good to do. The family then argue amongst themselves and the female appears the most sensible one.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
|
I think the police is very right, offering money for tips is not always good to do. The family then argue amongst themselves and the female appears the most sensible one.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
-
Thanks so much, Ine. I apprecia your review very much! Warm regards, Bev
-
so welcome Bev, Ine
Comment from misscookie
You capture my attention all the way.
Never a dull moment as usual.
Money can be used for the good yet the twins are fghting over something they didn't have to work for.
thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
|
You capture my attention all the way.
Never a dull moment as usual.
Money can be used for the good yet the twins are fghting over something they didn't have to work for.
thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
-
Thank you! I always appreciate hearing form you misscookie. You are kind and generous lady. Thanks for reading. Hugs, Bev
-
Your very welcome my friend . Until next time.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, writingfundimension, you did an excellent job writing this chapter where two brothers are fighting each other and when they're disrupted, remind the deputy of the old ways. another body is found and he asks to keep it secret from everybody
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
|
this is very well written, writingfundimension, you did an excellent job writing this chapter where two brothers are fighting each other and when they're disrupted, remind the deputy of the old ways. another body is found and he asks to keep it secret from everybody
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
-
Thank you very much, sweet. I really appreciate your time and encouragement. Your generosity means a lot to me. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Selina Stambi
How well this story is developing, Bev.
The excitement mounts. I liked the description of the tussle between the twins. I also enjoyed the underlying promise of romance ... I could see her hips sway as she walked away!!
Another great chapter - and you've ended at a fine cliff hanger.
But I am by nature a deal maker, and when necessary, a ball breaker. .. love the line!
Idukala (mouse) will soon feel the breath of Igmu (cat), he thought... also (niece) suggestion: why not put the meanings of the words in the author notes?
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
|
How well this story is developing, Bev.
The excitement mounts. I liked the description of the tussle between the twins. I also enjoyed the underlying promise of romance ... I could see her hips sway as she walked away!!
Another great chapter - and you've ended at a fine cliff hanger.
But I am by nature a deal maker, and when necessary, a ball breaker. .. love the line!
Idukala (mouse) will soon feel the breath of Igmu (cat), he thought... also (niece) suggestion: why not put the meanings of the words in the author notes?
Comment Written 24-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
-
Hi, R4TS. There's a sort of divide on the site about whether to include the interpretations with the text. Some reviewers have said they prefer it and others do not. I've actually done it both ways in this novel, especially for longer chapters with more of the dialect.
Thanks so much for the great review, my friend. I appreciate the support and generosity very much.
Hugs, Bev
Comment from Dawn Munro
You have done it again, my friend - this is another masterpiece of intrigue, suspense and action. You sure know how to entertain, Bev!
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
|
You have done it again, my friend - this is another masterpiece of intrigue, suspense and action. You sure know how to entertain, Bev!
Comment Written 23-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2013
-
Thank you so much, Dawn. I really appreciate your encouragement and support, my friend. Hugs, Bev