Contest Entry and Winners
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "Innocent At Heart"Short Stories
72 total reviews
Comment from Perp Ihebom
This is a sweet story . The poetic justice here is very well portrayed, and i love the way right triumphed over the bad bad guys. I really enjoyed it. kudos
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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This is a sweet story . The poetic justice here is very well portrayed, and i love the way right triumphed over the bad bad guys. I really enjoyed it. kudos
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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Perp,
Yes, I wanted good to beat out the bad for sure! Thanks for the generous review. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Kathryn Varuzza
This is good.
I liked it.
Good descriptions.
I liked the dialogue.
And the developements.
Suspenseful.
I liked how you ended it too.
Good luck in the contest.
kathryn
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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This is good.
I liked it.
Good descriptions.
I liked the dialogue.
And the developements.
Suspenseful.
I liked how you ended it too.
Good luck in the contest.
kathryn
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2010
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Kathryn,
Thank you so much for the generous and kind review. Always appreciate hearing from you. Smiles, CArol
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You're welcome Carol,
Kathryn
Comment from blsdauthor
Fantastic. Perhaps I should continue reading your material for the sheer enjoyment of it. LOL No ratings. I have once again run out of 6 stars! I look forward to your writing all the time
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Fantastic. Perhaps I should continue reading your material for the sheer enjoyment of it. LOL No ratings. I have once again run out of 6 stars! I look forward to your writing all the time
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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blsdauthor,
I am honored that you enjoy my work and feel blessed by your continual support and praise. Virtual sixes lift my spirit too!
Thank you for always enjoying and graciously commenting. Smiles, Carol
Comment from sugardog
Nice job on this fast paced and entertaining read! You amaze me with all your different stories. I liked that Megan had a good friend, Tammy, to stand by her and bring out the truth to what really happened. Tammy believed in her friend and I loved the happy ending!
"The interior of the house was a shambles." Should it say "in" shambles-not sure, but just seemed like it should.
You are a great story teller-good luck in the contest. Dana
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Nice job on this fast paced and entertaining read! You amaze me with all your different stories. I liked that Megan had a good friend, Tammy, to stand by her and bring out the truth to what really happened. Tammy believed in her friend and I loved the happy ending!
"The interior of the house was a shambles." Should it say "in" shambles-not sure, but just seemed like it should.
You are a great story teller-good luck in the contest. Dana
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Dana,
Nice catch! Missed that and I appreciate the catch! Thank you for enjoying my stories. I always appreciate it when others find merit in them as well. smiles, Carol
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You are so welcome!! Dana
Comment from dragonqueen1983
you have a great story here. its well weitten and i love the pic that you used. there are alot of good entries in the contest and yours is one of them
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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you have a great story here. its well weitten and i love the pic that you used. there are alot of good entries in the contest and yours is one of them
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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dragonqueen,
thank you for the wonderful and encouraging review. I appreciate your comments. Smiles, Carol
Comment from patwannabe
Carol, this is marvelous, as usual. I hope your brain never empties as you are a first class story teller.
Only one word struck me as being out of place: I wondered where Louis, the owner was AT. Mercy me, do you need that AT? It kinda hit me in the pit of my stomach and ruined an otherwise perfect write. "I wondered where Louis, the owner was." (This is not really correct, either.) How about: "Where was Louis, the owner? He's always here." (Your choice, of course, your story.)
Keep writing, I'll read. pat
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Carol, this is marvelous, as usual. I hope your brain never empties as you are a first class story teller.
Only one word struck me as being out of place: I wondered where Louis, the owner was AT. Mercy me, do you need that AT? It kinda hit me in the pit of my stomach and ruined an otherwise perfect write. "I wondered where Louis, the owner was." (This is not really correct, either.) How about: "Where was Louis, the owner? He's always here." (Your choice, of course, your story.)
Keep writing, I'll read. pat
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Pat,
Oops..one of my vocal flaws...but I have quickly corrected it. Too bad I can't change my everyday speaking as easily. LOL Thanks for the wonderful review and the gracious comments. Smiles, Carol
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I talk that way, too. I like the way you changed the sentence and glad you used your own words, not mine. Mark of a real writer. Thanks, pat
Comment from shelley kaye
not that scary but still a good story anmd kept me reading to find out what will happen
good use of the prompt
didn't notice and spaggies or typos
thanx for sharing and good luck!
shelley :)
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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not that scary but still a good story anmd kept me reading to find out what will happen
good use of the prompt
didn't notice and spaggies or typos
thanx for sharing and good luck!
shelley :)
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Shelley
I'm not too into the horror blood and guts stuff...about as scary as I get...Thanks for the kind review. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Sharesy
Just this one little spag:
Like a bolt of lightning, [he] fingers snared my arm and yanked me to my feet - his
This was excellent, Carol. I loved the surprise ending.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Just this one little spag:
Like a bolt of lightning, [he] fingers snared my arm and yanked me to my feet - his
This was excellent, Carol. I loved the surprise ending.
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Sharesy,
I thought I corrected that, but maybe I forgot to save it. Will check again, thank you...I am thrilled you enjoyed the story. Smiles and thanks, Carol
Comment from FredCollingwood
I like this word prompt--makes for a great opening. Wel written as usual. One thing:
Like a bolt of lightning, (he) fingers snared my arm and yanked me to my feet. > typo.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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I like this word prompt--makes for a great opening. Wel written as usual. One thing:
Like a bolt of lightning, (he) fingers snared my arm and yanked me to my feet. > typo.
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Fred,
Thanks for catching the ttpo and for enjoying my story. I appreciate your time and comments. Smiles, Carol
Comment from LadyNyx
Wow, this was simply fantastic! I couldn't stop reading, didn't even want to stop to watch something my son wanted to show me (I did though). Very believable and touching. I'm glad Megan managed to get through it all. Great job!
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Wow, this was simply fantastic! I couldn't stop reading, didn't even want to stop to watch something my son wanted to show me (I did though). Very believable and touching. I'm glad Megan managed to get through it all. Great job!
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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LadyNyx,
I'm thrilled when someone gets really involved with my characters and the plot. Thank you for your generous comments. Smiles to you, Carol