Comment from jmdg1954

Excellent

I'm glad you chose to revive this poem as it brought a smile to my face. It was smooth and thought out and made for s great read.
Is the blue winners medal for 2014 posting or from the first time?

Nicely done... John

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Thanks, John. The competition win was for the first posting.

Glad you enjoyed this.

Steve

Comment from MissMerri

Exceptional

This is a delightful and enchanting children's poem, but what I like even better than the cute story told through the eyes so a Teddy bear, is the fact that you tell it in mature language. There are plenty of words in this story to tweak the little brains and make them ask "What does that mean?" Or perhaps in some cases, learn from the context the use of a word or words they do not hear every day in second grade. (Or third) As a teacher, I have long believed that one of the best ways to introduce new words and increase a child's vocabulary is through reading stories that are age-appropriate yet well-written and not too simple in word choices. You have written such a story and I couldn't be more pleased. This is great and when your book is published, I will be first in line for a few copies. ;")

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Thanks, MM

I haven't seen you around for a while.

I was talking about a FS book, but I still have to achieve one of my new year resolutions which was 'Get something published this year!' I have just realised to my dismay that we are halfway through the year already...

Steve

PS I agree entirely with your sentiments about vocabulary - no point expecting kids to learn from books where they are already familiar with all the words.

reply by MissMerri on 06-Aug-2014

I do hope you will at least try to publish a children's storybook. One point I didn't mention... When adults enjoy a story too, they will be more inclined to read it over and over and eventually it becomes a classic. "Jane saw Dick and Spot" just doesn't do it for most of us. ;")
I had a wedding reception in my back yard Friday, for about 250 people. It has been hectic to say the least. The last of the tables and chairs were carried off yesterday. I wrote "Though Breakers Crash" somewhere in the days before. It was a cathartic poem.

Comment from nancy_e_davis

Excellent

That will be a very nice selection for you children's book. I see you won a first in the contest and it is well deserved. Great rhythm and rhyme telling about a Teddy Bears busy day with is little girl. Well done Steve. Nancy

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Thanks, Nancy.

And did I see your name on the winner's list as well? Congratulations!

Comment from Selina Stambi

Exceptional

I am such a sucker for good children's literature - this is very R.L. Stevensen-esque!

A very worthy win, Steve.

Your rhyming//timing/metre are flawless.

Love the pairing of Jemima/china!

Altogether loved it!

Sonali

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Sonali, thanks for the great review and the six stars.

I have a bit of a soft spot for Teddy and Molly...

Steve

Comment from JeanneHP

Excellent

New or revived, it's a delightful poem, well written and rhymed. You created a great picture in the lives of Molly and her teddy bear. Loved it. Jeanne :-)

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Thanks, Jeanne!

Steve

Comment from fastdigits

Exceptional

What a beautifully sculptured children's
poem that rattles down the screen in
rhyming illustrative passages that
bring back the child in all of us,
fighting pirates, all sorts of
imaginative adventures fitted into
a day of hard work.
Well done as I see you were the contest winner

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Thanks for the wonderful review.

yes, it is a busy, bustling poem - possibly my own favourite of all of the children's ones I have written.

Steve

Comment from GWHARGIS

Excellent

I loved the adventurous feel to this one. Told through the eyes of the bear was clever and took the pretend feeling away. Nice imagery and fun to read.

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Thanks for the kind words.

Steve

Comment from Ben Colder

Excellent

No doubt this was a winner. Great use of strong wording. Nice rhythm that flows well. I can see a little toddler having fun with Teddy. Shalom.

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Thanks, ben - glad you enjoyed.

Steve

Comment from humpwhistle

Excellent

I really like, Steve, especially from Teddy's point of view.
So really neat rhymes. And you squirmed your way out of a few tight meter jams--with aplomb.
I think you have a special knack for writing things can enjoy without feeling pandered to. (Pandered being a black and white bear, not to be mistaken for Teddy.)
And pirates are always good for adventure.

Peace, Lee

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Thank you. You are right, children can't bear being pandered to - it bruins their enjoyment of the story, browns them off and makes them all grizzly!

Steve

reply by humpwhistle on 06-Aug-2014

Sheesh, you couldn't leave me one bear pun to respond with? Hog!

Comment from MisinformedPoet

Exceptional

This is such a charming children's poem with lines that flow really well, making it really easy to be read aloud (which is essential and makes it pleasurable to roll off the tongue). I love the gentle capers and finishing off with tea and a bath. Perfect!

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

And thank you again! This is one of my favourites from all the poems I have written for children.

Steve