Reviews from

Steve's Poems for Kids

Viewing comments for Chapter 22 "Crazy Critters"
A collection of my children's poems

69 total reviews 
Comment from barkingdog
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a pretty funny story and then a twist to scare at the last stanza.
The rhyme and rhythm are good. It reads smoothly.
The reader enjoys following all of the strange critters pointed out. This keeps one reading. The teller of the story is collecting 'critters' and the last to be caged are the children, the 'Sweet Kiddie- Boppers.'
Children like to be told scary stories. With a tickle this might work at bed time.

 Comment Written 11-May-2011


reply by the author on 11-May-2011
    Thank you - yes I believe most youngsters are resilient enough to take this, although one or two reviewers have baulked at the ending.
    Thanks for stopping by.
reply by barkingdog on 11-May-2011
    Sissies. LOL You're welcome for the review.:) barking dog.
    It is a good way to warn children about those people who appear fine, showing all of the fun thing about, and than turn out to be the bad guy that lead you into a trap. A little healthy paranoia is not a bad thing.
Comment from miss joyce
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I need a maid. Do these macroscopic critters really exist? You have brought them very successfully to light here.
Children read some eerie literature these days. This is really a great contest entry and I wish you well with it!

 Comment Written 10-May-2011


reply by the author on 10-May-2011
    Thank you - yes, it ended up with a slightly spooky ending - not my fault - the critters made me do it...
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is highly original and creative. How in the world did you come up with all those interesting new names for animals? The Kiddie-Boppers I recognize, though maybe not by that name, as some of my own I felt at times belonged in a Critter Zoo. Good luck to you in the contest. Jeanie Mercer

 Comment Written 10-May-2011


reply by the author on 10-May-2011
    Thanks, Jeanie - just a warped and twisted mind I guess
Comment from c_lucas
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Shades of Dr. Seuss! This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. There is very good imagery. Good luck in your contest.
Suggestion,
I like the originality of some of your names, but Jitterbug is too common. Just my thought.

 Comment Written 10-May-2011


reply by the author on 10-May-2011
    Thanks for the review and the sixer. Yes, I know about 'jitterbug' but it's such a delightful word anyway.
reply by c_lucas on 11-May-2011
    You;re welcome, Take a note from Dr. Seuss. Invent you own word, "Kitterbug." Charlie
Comment from LKM2009
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Nice. I may have misinterpreted this poem but I felt, I can't recall what story I am thinking of, it is like an older tale of someone luring the kids in be eaten, something like that. I did enjoy it.

 Comment Written 10-May-2011


reply by the author on 10-May-2011
    I didn't have anything in mind when I wrote it....
    Thanks for the kind review.
Comment from writerwish
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I can see how children can relate to this because they have such vivid imaginations. The rhyming and word choice is very good. However I would not tell this to my granddaughters or they would be frightened.

 Comment Written 10-May-2011


reply by the author on 10-May-2011
    thanks for the review - sorry you felt it was a little too scary.
Comment from angel123
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

What are you trying to do the kids? Ha! Ha! I enjoyed reading your poem. It is well written and interesting. It flowed well and I have no suggestions for any changes.

Angel123

 Comment Written 10-May-2011


reply by the author on 10-May-2011
    I'm trying to get them to grow up warped and twisted like me... Ha, ha, ha...
Comment from WilliamDeen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dr. Suess lives! Good work and a very fun and enjoyable read. Great rhymes, good flow, fun critter names. Thanks for sharing this piece.

 Comment Written 10-May-2011


reply by the author on 10-May-2011
    Thank you - I've had the Dr Seuss comment a few times although it wasn't really in my mind as I wrote.
Comment from Magic Wand
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Reminds me of the inventive words in a Seuss book. Great imagination, with the kinds of words kids love to speak. Nonsensical images come to mind and it is just so darn fun to read.

 Comment Written 10-May-2011


reply by the author on 10-May-2011
    Thank you - I've had the Dr Seuss comment a few times although it wasn't really in my mind as I wrote.
Comment from DALLAS01
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I chuckled all the way through this whimsical treat. The rhyming was great the names of the critters brilliantly enticing. Your imagination and creativity combined to spin a delightful yarn. The satori a complete surprise.

 Comment Written 10-May-2011


reply by the author on 10-May-2011
    Thank you - the ending was a bit of a risk, and does change the tone, but I couldn't come up with anything else and I always like a 'strong' finish.
reply by DALLAS01 on 11-May-2011
    You're welcome