Tornado descends
haiku inspired awesome power of nature43 total reviews
Comment from malachi1206
I'm finally learning enough about the Haiku as a style of poem I feel I can review these better the challenge will come with writing one this was written well and followed classic lines excellent malachi1206
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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I'm finally learning enough about the Haiku as a style of poem I feel I can review these better the challenge will come with writing one this was written well and followed classic lines excellent malachi1206
Comment Written 14-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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thank you
Comment from shannonsad
very powerful short poem--
I really love the photo
it is a sad fact of life that no one can change
we can only look to fact we can rebuild
thanks for sharing
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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very powerful short poem--
I really love the photo
it is a sad fact of life that no one can change
we can only look to fact we can rebuild
thanks for sharing
Comment Written 14-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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thanks so much
Comment from dragonqueen1983
your poem is short but to the point and says alot with only a few words. together with the picture its a firm reminder of the power of natue. well done
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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your poem is short but to the point and says alot with only a few words. together with the picture its a firm reminder of the power of natue. well done
Comment Written 14-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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thank you
Comment from Adam Smith
Really interesting topic for a haiku. I prefer when all the lines are independent, but that's just a personal opinion. This works and captures the image very well.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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Really interesting topic for a haiku. I prefer when all the lines are independent, but that's just a personal opinion. This works and captures the image very well.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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thank you
Comment from Just a Girl...
Love it! Worded perfectly together! So sad but unbelieviale how true it is! I enjoy reading this type of poem. Short but in 3 lines strong an entire story!
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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Love it! Worded perfectly together! So sad but unbelieviale how true it is! I enjoy reading this type of poem. Short but in 3 lines strong an entire story!
Comment Written 14-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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thanks so much
Comment from ExperiencingLiphe
Yes, tornados are horrible. They destroy everything and kill a lot of innocent people. There are a lot of deadly different weather storms though. Tornados are one out of many.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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Yes, tornados are horrible. They destroy everything and kill a lot of innocent people. There are a lot of deadly different weather storms though. Tornados are one out of many.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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thank you
Comment from auswag
Hi, Often, I feel, the simplest communications are the most effective, or, have the least impact, and despite their simpleness, need a lot of good things going for them to succeed. They are in my view, the most difficult to get right.
The rating suggests a better image is needed and from my own work in photography, I've worked out that if an image is to have the desired impact, it must be outstanding enough to stop the viewer in their tracks, before a more lengthy appraisal will follow. On my screen the image is faint and because of that doesn't have the qualities of shadow, contrast, and the interest they bring. The lines are like grid lines, at first glance, so the eye easily dismisses a grid because it doesn't stand out as might the same shot with the lines of the roadways entering from one corner. In short, while the picture is so prominent a player here, it comes under the spotlight first and foremost, in a reader/viewers eye and the loss of impact it delivers, lets the balance of the message down.
For me, the pic and the words must work together to present a strong impression with so few words.
Photoshop or another tool may bring the pic to life? Changing my screen brightness doesn't help?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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Hi, Often, I feel, the simplest communications are the most effective, or, have the least impact, and despite their simpleness, need a lot of good things going for them to succeed. They are in my view, the most difficult to get right.
The rating suggests a better image is needed and from my own work in photography, I've worked out that if an image is to have the desired impact, it must be outstanding enough to stop the viewer in their tracks, before a more lengthy appraisal will follow. On my screen the image is faint and because of that doesn't have the qualities of shadow, contrast, and the interest they bring. The lines are like grid lines, at first glance, so the eye easily dismisses a grid because it doesn't stand out as might the same shot with the lines of the roadways entering from one corner. In short, while the picture is so prominent a player here, it comes under the spotlight first and foremost, in a reader/viewers eye and the loss of impact it delivers, lets the balance of the message down.
For me, the pic and the words must work together to present a strong impression with so few words.
Photoshop or another tool may bring the pic to life? Changing my screen brightness doesn't help?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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i thought this was a writing site not one based on photography this is a picture of a destroyed mobile park thats why it looks loke a grid and although you are entitled to your own opinion i felt it was better than your average haiku
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Point taken! Though I have to stick to my guns on this one. If a pic is included, it will be seen, and does have a part to play in the delivery, else why include it? I would dearly love to say, "please don't look at my punctuation" but of course I can't ask that of anyone reading my work. I've included punctuation marks and readers are helping me to do better by highlighting my shortcomings in that area. It's a tough road we've taken.
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i would agree with you except for the fact that most people who write on this site do not take the pictures they have posted this one represents the destruction portrayed by the poem. I might suggest someone should use a better picture and if there poem is poor i would give a two star rating but as the number six reveiwer on this site i would tell you once again this is a writing site photos are enhancements writing should stand on its own. Your comparison on punctuation does not have bearing, because that is part of the writing a photo is not. I respect your views but i also stick by my guns mate have a great tomorrow
Earthwriter out.
Comment from ledford
So true. What horrible destruction it leaves. It is so sad to hear about all the lives lost and homes destroyed after one has made it's way through.
Good job:-) No suggestions. It looks great:-)
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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So true. What horrible destruction it leaves. It is so sad to hear about all the lives lost and homes destroyed after one has made it's way through.
Good job:-) No suggestions. It looks great:-)
Comment Written 14-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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thank you
Comment from kassey
Your poem is short and sweet and sadly straight to the point. the picture goes with it so well to describe the devastation.
You wrote it simply and clearly, very good work Kay
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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Your poem is short and sweet and sadly straight to the point. the picture goes with it so well to describe the devastation.
You wrote it simply and clearly, very good work Kay
Comment Written 14-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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thank you
Comment from FrankieT
earthwriter, only three lines but they do say it all. :) These short ones are difficult to write a review for so space, space, space. ;oO)
FrankieT
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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earthwriter, only three lines but they do say it all. :) These short ones are difficult to write a review for so space, space, space. ;oO)
FrankieT
Comment Written 14-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2008
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thanks so much