Reviews from

Miss Snider's Amazing Gift

The view From the Window of My Tiny Stone Cottage

38 total reviews 
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Love the new picture. Now I feel like I know what you look like. This is a wonderful story, very much a coming-of-age story. Some people, no matter how short the acquaintance, teach us valuable life lessons. As we progress through acquaintances with others, they also teach us lessons. Only foolish people never let themselves feel for others and learn nothing.

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    Oh, and I'm working on the sequel to this. I think you'll like it, Carol. Meanwhile, thank you so much for the six stars and your always encouraging words.
Comment from GWHARGIS
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

No snack needed, I had a big lunch. This was beautiful and honestly, quite mysterious. I loved the description of the unlocking of the door. That was awesome. This was surreal and yet it was no grand action just people connecting to other people. Bravo. Gretchen

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    Oh, Gretchen, I'm so glad you caught the "no grand action" design. That was precisely the reaction I was hoping would be elicited from it. And a six, my dear!!! Thank you.
Comment from Annmuma
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I have missed you and your fabulous stories. I always feel as if I am in the story, feeling what the characters feel, knowing the scene set, etc. Another great job done in your unique and creative way. Thanks for posting. A tiny, tiny suggestion, the font is just a little difficult for me to read. I did figure out how to magnify it so as not to miss one word.

Good luck in the contest. Great story, well presented. ann

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    You know, Terry mentioned the small font as well. The only problem with that is that it cuts the scroll-bar about in half ... and in case you haven't noticed, many people pass on a piece because of the size of the scroll bar. LOL. Thanks, dear for the six stars. But more than that, your enthusiasm for my writing keeps me wired for more!

    Jay
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Thank you for sharing this contest entry with us. It's a very emotional story. Your writing made me feel as if I was there watching as it happened. Good luck with the contest.

Anna responded. "You play beautifully, Gladys, (comma after 'responded'0

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    Thank you, Barbara. Yes, I questioned that myself. The character tag felt like it was needed before the dialogue, and I thought I would handle it like, "Anna laughed." or "Anna shrugged." But, you're right. It is a verbal tag. So I will change it. And thanks for suggesting it. Six stars ain't bad, either, LOL.
Comment from Cathy M
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Yes you are an author. What a poignant story. I fell in love with Miss Snider and the early you Jay Squires. You gave me poetry in prose and I loved it. The struggles and the friendship you gained with your landlady. What hit me the most is the piano playing the song and how it is associated with the ocean. Very well done there.

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    Cathy, your kind and enthusiastic words really move me. Thank you so very much for reading this. I'm humbled that it moved you.
    Jay
Comment from pome lover
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

well, Jay, this is a rather strange story, at least to me.
I wasn't aware that in a Share your Story contest, you could present it in increments. At any rate, you do have a way with words, not unlike a story teller who has all the time in the world and a willing audience soaking up every word, so I await your next installment. I may read it at night and bring along a glass of chardonnay and a couple of homemade cookies.
Did reading those books promote including your own inner thoughts throughout storytelling? Of course, this story does include you, so that is natural, but thinking back to your play that I wish you had somehow been able to pull off - the one with songs , and your main character who was so ... different, I remember your including your thoughts. I guess what I'm asking is in those books she gave you, was "personalising" your writing suggested, to add another perspective to the story?
Have been rather longwinded, here, for which I apologize, but am curious if that was something you learned from the books.
Katharine

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    If you mean Miss Snider's books, no ... they were all by Rudolf Steiner, and they were purely for psychic development. And Miss Snider was the personification of his philosophy.

    Now, as to the contest ... I only included this in the "true story" contest because I hate to see all the work I do in preparation (and I don't think anyone here knows how hard it is for me to write), not be used for a contest. BTW, thank you, truly, for hanging onto the memory of my musical. I have so many sadnesses related to it. Bless you, Katharine.
reply by pome lover on 01-Oct-2023
    Oh, I guess I didn't know there were sadnesses related to your musical, just that you had to have music and lyrics, etc. Your characters were great! as was the story.
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    No the sadness came because I got so many people involved, like you, my dear Katharine, and then smashed into a brick wall of poor planning on my part. I felt like I let everyone down.
reply by pome lover on 02-Oct-2023
    well I saved all (my) lyrics, just in case. :) I really loved that play.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2023
    Bless you for that!
reply by pome lover on 02-Oct-2023
    thanks, Jay!
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

It's good to see you back, I missed you. This was a delight of a read, and a wonderful peep into your young life. Landladies can have such an influence on their tenants, and you drew well on that concept. It din't feel long to me, on the contrary it flowed well. kay

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    Kay, I missed you, too. I've been away to another site, recently. It pays writers based on an algorithm of reads and claps given for a piece. Some serious money has been made there, some by a writer here whose name you probably know. I haven't been able to niche myself into the cash-flow yet. But if I do, it will sure help me financially. Anyway, I hope your health is good and you are happy. (pssst., I don't like that bio pic of you. It scares me, and it bothers me that I don't know why it scares me. Methinks I'm regressing.
    Jay
reply by Katherine M. (k-11) on 17-Oct-2023
    I have not been well. I fainted onto a tiled floor over concrete and broke my nose. In ER they identified I had a pulmonary embolism, so I was treated to two weeks in hospital as I had complications and side effects of the anti-coagulants. I just came home this afternoon, with a strict diet and medication route to follow. kay
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2023
    Oh, Kay-Kay, I'm so sorry you suffered this complication to your life. Was the pulmonary embolism the cause of the fainting? Either way, you're on your way to recovery. Keep us all in the loop, Kay-Kay. We love you here.

    I will be leaving soon, but you have my email address, so we can keep in touch.

    Loving you, Kay-Kay

    Jay
reply by Katherine M. (k-11) on 19-Oct-2023
    What do you mean you are leaving? where are you going? This news stresses me out. kay
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2023
    My membership is up for renewal. I'm not paying it at this time. I won't let anyone gift me the membership, though I appreciate their efforts and their love. I need to get my head on straight before I return. I expect it to be in about 6 months. Thank you, Kay, for caring.

    Jay
Comment from Terry Broxson
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Jay, here is what I liked about your story: the writing. If one thinks of a gentle breeze that creeps over the hill country of Texas in the evening, bringing with it a coolness that is missed in the day, then that is Jay Squires' writing at its best. And this is best!

What I don't like is the small font. Too dang small for these old eyes! How did you get to Texas anyway? That must be another story. Terry.

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    I thought I'd told you. Marty's girlfriend lived in San Antonio. They met while we were in basic training in Lackland. After our Air Force tours of duty were over, Marty and I reunited back in Santa Maria (our home town). We attended a creative writing class together in the local community college. Buffered with our belief that our genius only needed a "roughing it" life to blossom, we decided to travel to San Antonio in my MG Midget, and write, write, write! Of course Marty's love of Betty was reignited. She moved to Austin to go to U of T. Marty followed. I stayed and the story begins ... The background is covered, for the most part, in the first chapter of my "Down and Out in San Antonio", in my portfolio.

    Thank you my dear friend, for reading and your always pertinent words of encouragement. I'll check out the font.
Comment from Jim Wile
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This was beautiful, Jay. Such a touching story written in your inimitable, literary style with such vivid descriptions of the environment, the music, the emotions you felt, and the characters that people the story.

It's obvious that Miss Snider was very selective about who she wanted to rent the cottage to, and that you filled the bill for her. I loved the innocence and awkwardness of your first tea with her as well as the love and respect that developed between you two. It was a very sweet story so lovingly written about a very special relationship.

I'm eager for part 2 now. - Jim

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    Jim, you are one special fan! You caught every nuance of the story I was hoping the reader would catch! Much obliged, friend!
Comment from Ric Myworld
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Well, since I hadn't seen any posts or reviews lately, I'd come to think you might have been whisked away to stardom and forgotten some of us. But thankfully, you've magically appeared with another masterpiece. It's always a privilege to be blessed with your fine writing. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
    Thank you, Ric. Yes, I've been away. No stardom, though. Just a slow build-up of an audience there, but at least making a little money at it. It's so good to see you reviewing this.