Puppy Love
Is it possible to be in love for a lifetime?16 total reviews
Comment from Gloria ....
Author, excellent into and your story just kept getting better and better. I got a great laugh from the line the sight of his naked skull horrified me. Yip, I get that feeling. Good one.
I am so laughing about the "bitch down the street" oh dear, tears in my eyes now. LOL, Ex-lax, mmm hmmm know that one.
Ooooo would forgo the pleasure of shopping in Wal-Mart that's a powerful hatred going on.
Aw and what a great twist with Danny's new girlfriend. Gretchen sounds wonderful.
What a wonderful segue from the shaved head to baldness for real many years later. Very adeptly written.
Terrific story telling. I was intrigued from start to finish. The story is authentic and exceptionally well written. This is the kind of romance story I love reading.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
Gloria
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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Author, excellent into and your story just kept getting better and better. I got a great laugh from the line the sight of his naked skull horrified me. Yip, I get that feeling. Good one.
I am so laughing about the "bitch down the street" oh dear, tears in my eyes now. LOL, Ex-lax, mmm hmmm know that one.
Ooooo would forgo the pleasure of shopping in Wal-Mart that's a powerful hatred going on.
Aw and what a great twist with Danny's new girlfriend. Gretchen sounds wonderful.
What a wonderful segue from the shaved head to baldness for real many years later. Very adeptly written.
Terrific story telling. I was intrigued from start to finish. The story is authentic and exceptionally well written. This is the kind of romance story I love reading.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
Gloria
Comment Written 05-May-2015
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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Beautiful response that I appreciate very much. Thanks.
Comment from bizzygirl
Truth is stranger than fiction. We see these types of stories all the time. This is a lovely lifelong tale. The thoughts of a young girl, growing up and love unrequited are so real. The story isso fraught with angst and longing. Lovely characterization. WELL DONE
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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Truth is stranger than fiction. We see these types of stories all the time. This is a lovely lifelong tale. The thoughts of a young girl, growing up and love unrequited are so real. The story isso fraught with angst and longing. Lovely characterization. WELL DONE
Comment Written 05-May-2015
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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Thanks so much. I think we all have someone in our lives we wonder about.
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I agree
Comment from janalma
Very good story. The suspense of wondering if she would ever get Danny carries all the way thru. The story is logically laid out and transitions are smooth. I enjoyed reading it and saw no errors in grammar or sentence structure.
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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Very good story. The suspense of wondering if she would ever get Danny carries all the way thru. The story is logically laid out and transitions are smooth. I enjoyed reading it and saw no errors in grammar or sentence structure.
Comment Written 05-May-2015
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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Thanks. I guess we all wonder about someone.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
That was a very good story and very believable.
Yes I believe love can last a lifetime because
mine did. It seems in the end the author got her guy. Happy endings are always a plus. Well done.xsx Nancy
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reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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That was a very good story and very believable.
Yes I believe love can last a lifetime because
mine did. It seems in the end the author got her guy. Happy endings are always a plus. Well done.xsx Nancy
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-May-2015
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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You are a very lucky woman. Thanks.
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
This is the first entry into the contest I have read. This was great. The writing was smooth and very believable. The a parallel lives hinted at and commented upon was very well handled. Great word choices and construction of the piece. A very good job.
Had it really taken Danny forty years to have feelings for me? 36 years to be accurate - VERY pedantic, I know but if she is recalling everything with such detail and clarity she would probably know exactly how long it had been. I would use the exact number or say 'almost forty years'. Just a thought.
Great entry and good luck.
GMG
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reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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Hi there,
This is the first entry into the contest I have read. This was great. The writing was smooth and very believable. The a parallel lives hinted at and commented upon was very well handled. Great word choices and construction of the piece. A very good job.
Had it really taken Danny forty years to have feelings for me? 36 years to be accurate - VERY pedantic, I know but if she is recalling everything with such detail and clarity she would probably know exactly how long it had been. I would use the exact number or say 'almost forty years'. Just a thought.
Great entry and good luck.
GMG
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-May-2015
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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Well, I always welcome comments on detail as it can trip a writer up. I will change it MORE than 40 years, only because she was 4 when she fell for Danny and is now just a few weeks away from her 50th. No woman counts from the last time she saw someone as a measurement, but rather from the beginning of her emotional investment, so it makes sense on both counts. Thanks.
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Actually, you are right, as this statement occurred on her 40th birthday. Thanks again.
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All the best with it. Great piece.
Comment from Lesley Collier
Wonderful story of an everlasting love surviving the ups and downs of growing up and going separate ways and many years later coming full circle to what could have been a different path of love and commitment that may have lasted a lifetime. I went through a similar experience in my twenties when I fell madly in love and although I am in my fifties now and have had many relationships I still wonder about him and his life and what would have been if circumstances had been different. Ironically his name was Dan and he treated me like a princess in a way that I will treasure forever. A beautifully romantic story, well written and in many cases can happen to each and every one of us.
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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Wonderful story of an everlasting love surviving the ups and downs of growing up and going separate ways and many years later coming full circle to what could have been a different path of love and commitment that may have lasted a lifetime. I went through a similar experience in my twenties when I fell madly in love and although I am in my fifties now and have had many relationships I still wonder about him and his life and what would have been if circumstances had been different. Ironically his name was Dan and he treated me like a princess in a way that I will treasure forever. A beautifully romantic story, well written and in many cases can happen to each and every one of us.
Comment Written 05-May-2015
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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I think there's a longing in all of us for the what could have been. I too have my teenage heart throb that I think about from time to time. I do love the fantasy, though, I too am old enough to know that it is a fairy tale. Life has many twists that change to successful probability. Thanks so much for your generous stars.