Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 36 "With Your Mouth Closed"Assorted poetry
24 total reviews
Comment from Willowsong
Wow! A very creepy read this was. Had a suspenseful lead up to the climax and excellent imagery used. Had a touch of Hannibal Lecter in it. Nice job keeping it within 100 words. Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Wow! A very creepy read this was. Had a suspenseful lead up to the climax and excellent imagery used. Had a touch of Hannibal Lecter in it. Nice job keeping it within 100 words. Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you, Willowsong, for the excellent review.
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You're welcome :-)
Comment from Andrewajgblue
I liked this very much, it was quite spooky and the story was strong, great wording that built up the the last stanza, good work,
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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I liked this very much, it was quite spooky and the story was strong, great wording that built up the the last stanza, good work,
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you, Andrew, for the excellent review.
Comment from TAB_that's me
It reminds a bit of the Dixie Chics song "Goodbye Earl" whick I love - lol! Great entry for the horror contest and good luck!
Teresa
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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It reminds a bit of the Dixie Chics song "Goodbye Earl" whick I love - lol! Great entry for the horror contest and good luck!
Teresa
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you, Teresa, for the excellent review.
Comment from Leineco
Ooooh! I must admit to quivering a bit as I read this - the pure terror of paralysis, delivered by a "trusted" companion who is actually quite 'mad' is surely one of the things that sends shivers down my spine. Knowing what is inevitable - yet unable to move a single muscle - what absolute horror! To be locked inside your mind. . .unable to even plead. Psychological terror!!!
Very very scary!
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Ooooh! I must admit to quivering a bit as I read this - the pure terror of paralysis, delivered by a "trusted" companion who is actually quite 'mad' is surely one of the things that sends shivers down my spine. Knowing what is inevitable - yet unable to move a single muscle - what absolute horror! To be locked inside your mind. . .unable to even plead. Psychological terror!!!
Very very scary!
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you, Leinco, for the excellent review.
Comment from c_lucas
This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is good imagery and descriptive scheme. Good luck in your contest.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is good imagery and descriptive scheme. Good luck in your contest.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you, Charlie, for the excellent review and good wishes.
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You're welcome.
Comment from Green Lake Girl
Super job with this horror writing prompt. Remind me to never eat dinner with you! This poem is very clever. Great rhyming. I hope you do well in the contest.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Super job with this horror writing prompt. Remind me to never eat dinner with you! This poem is very clever. Great rhyming. I hope you do well in the contest.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you, GLG, for the excellent review.
Comment from adewpearl
This is definitely horror as you get inside the dark and homicidal thoughts of this poisonous killer who takes pleasure in his victim's suffering. This made my skin crawl, which is the whole point :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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This is definitely horror as you get inside the dark and homicidal thoughts of this poisonous killer who takes pleasure in his victim's suffering. This made my skin crawl, which is the whole point :-) Brooke
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you, Brooke, for giving this a look.
Comment from Michaelk
Good poem, and a little disturbing. It reminds me of something the joker or Hannibal lector would do. To give someone a fine meal laced with poison and sit calmly discussing it with them as their life ebbs away.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Good poem, and a little disturbing. It reminds me of something the joker or Hannibal lector would do. To give someone a fine meal laced with poison and sit calmly discussing it with them as their life ebbs away.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you, Michael, for the excellent review.
Comment from Righteous Riter
The photo complimentary photo as the words bring the photo to life. Good description and alliteration. Good end rhyming. I see nothing that I would add, take out or adjust. Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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The photo complimentary photo as the words bring the photo to life. Good description and alliteration. Good end rhyming. I see nothing that I would add, take out or adjust. Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you, RR, for the excellent review.
Comment from weebert3
Wow!!! Creepy: I'm not much of a horror fan, but your piece sure gave me the willies. I sure wish it wasn't bed time, and I wasn't alone in this old, creaky house!
weebert3
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Wow!!! Creepy: I'm not much of a horror fan, but your piece sure gave me the willies. I sure wish it wasn't bed time, and I wasn't alone in this old, creaky house!
weebert3
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you, weebert, for the interesting review.