Comment from ZBaron

Excellent

This was a great read and I really really enjoyed it. They rhyming and your wording makes this flow very smoothly. And the imagery is right there with it. If I had a Six left it would be yours.

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013

Thanks for the great review and the virtual six.

Steve

Comment from Robin Gilmor

Excellent

Truly a lovely cacophone poem. This is another form for which I have absolutely no knowledge. Very interesting from start to finish and yes I can hear the sounds. A very clever piece of writing. I'd give you a six but I have none left. Robin :)

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013

Thanks for the great review and the virtual six.

Steve

Comment from MumEsGirl

Excellent

From the ratings you have received, it is obvious that the quality of the story has outstripped the need for strict word count.

This work has brought me right back to my childhood when young lads used to make 'steerinas,' the Cork slang for steering cars.

Your work adheres to the contest rules in all but the word count
hugs
kate

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013

Thanks, Kate - hope I didn't upset my co-first placer by breaking the rules and still sharing the prize....

Steve

reply by MumEsGirl on 31-Jan-2013

Whose word count is it going to be anyway. When I was learning 4 letters was a word. The office spell check and the fanstory one could be different too
love ya
kate

Comment from K.W.

Excellent

I really enjoyed this fun and light-hearted read:) great descriptions, wonderful language- I can just see a posse of dirty-faced boys climbing on board! Best, k

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013

Thank you!

Steve

reply by K.W. on 31-Jan-2013

My pleasure:)

Comment from fictionwriter

Excellent

I love this. It reminds me of when we used to build those cars and race them down the hills, crash them, then fix them up and do it all again. Well done.

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013

Thank you so much.

Steve

Comment from Dawn Munro

Excellent

Oh this is just simply WONDERFUL! The best cacophony poem I've read on this site, and maybe the best (my favorite) ever! I LOVED it. What skill, what craftsmanship, what a bard! (And me with no darn sixes!!!) OUTSTANDING good fun! Exceptional metering, perfectly suited to this marvel! Wonderful rhyme and word choices! I have a great, big, huge grin on my face.

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2013

Dawn - careful, you'll be giving me a big head!
Have had a few people say they're out of sixes - must be the time of the week.

Steve

Comment from Spitfire

Excellent

So much fun to read aloud. Close to rap music. Love your notes. Great flow and natural rhyme. Love:ding-dong dang,
bonk-bunk bink and big, bad blam.Hope you have children you can gather around to hear this. Love it.

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2013

Thank you - yep, I pulled out the stops on the sound effects for this - alas, no little ones at home to read this to, I just have to hear it in my head.

Steve

Comment from bhogg

Excellent

I know so little about poetry that I always enjoy seeing not only the work, but am allowed to understand the structure. This was a fun, easy read that brought back some memories. I'm glad you won your contest. Bill

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2013

Thanks, Bill

Steve

Comment from Chanphy

Excellent

I love this poem. It is sooooo funny. It has a beautiful melodious tune to it as I read it aloud. The words are simply precious. I really like the structure of it.
Excellent.

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2013

Thank you - yep, this one needs to be read aloud.

Steve

Comment from Starlit Ink

Excellent

You exceeded the lines, but they were just delightful to read, so I can see why you won. I can tell that you had fun writing this, and you used abab rhyming which shows difficulty and skill. I think that you just changed the rules to this prompt, since to be noisy, you need more than 12 lines. Congratulations!

 Comment Written 25-Jan-2013

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2013

Thank you - I feel a bit guilty for sneaking a win (actually it was a tie) despite breaking the rules, but you're right, I did have fun.

Steve