Contest Entry and Winners
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "You're Caught!"Short Stories
40 total reviews
Comment from Amfunny
Yikes. I didn't see that coming. Some friend. This is written extremely well and it held my interest during the entire time. Looks like a winner to me.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
  |
Yikes. I didn't see that coming. Some friend. This is written extremely well and it held my interest during the entire time. Looks like a winner to me.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
-
Amfunny
Appreciate the thoughts. I think blood won out over the friendship especially when she turned out to be a hugh drug supplier. Thanks for the review. Smiles to you...
Comment from fictionwriter
Wow. What a twist at the end. I never would have guessed that Heidi was in on it. I thought that her friend was doing her a favor. Great job.
eastern seaboard over the weekend(,) causing hundreds of
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
|
Wow. What a twist at the end. I never would have guessed that Heidi was in on it. I thought that her friend was doing her a favor. Great job.
eastern seaboard over the weekend(,) causing hundreds of
Comment Written 20-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
-
Joy
Hey, Can't believe I actually fooled you. Thanks for the great review. Appreciate it. Smiles, Carol
Comment from patmedium
What a convoluted tale with more twists than a corkscrew! You have a strong imagination. You managed all those twists without losing me off the back seat of the Harley, and what's more, you illustrated it all SO clearly. Congratulations and thankyou... I enjoyed the ride. Pat.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
|
What a convoluted tale with more twists than a corkscrew! You have a strong imagination. You managed all those twists without losing me off the back seat of the Harley, and what's more, you illustrated it all SO clearly. Congratulations and thankyou... I enjoyed the ride. Pat.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
-
Pat
You just never know where my brain my take you, my friend. Glad you enjoyed the ride and I appreciate the review. Smiles to you....
-
I will be pleased to find out WHO you are, masked stranger, because that was a stunning ride. Pat.
-
I don't understand the "lingo" all the time in other countries, but appreciate the stories. I'm smiling because you had a wonderful time.Smiles to you.....
Comment from LadyNyx
I'm shivering in surprise over this story. What a surprising twist, I never would have thought that her best friend was having her step-brothers baby, but also the end of product of a case. Talk about a really bad day. Good job at bringing us to that realization!
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
|
I'm shivering in surprise over this story. What a surprising twist, I never would have thought that her best friend was having her step-brothers baby, but also the end of product of a case. Talk about a really bad day. Good job at bringing us to that realization!
Comment Written 20-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
-
LadyNyx
It is my pleasure to have made your acquaintance and to have you enjoy my writing. I truly appreciate your comments. Thank you for the review. Smiles to you,
Comment from missy98writer
Writer.
I enjoyed reading your fantastic story "You're Caught!" Candice arrives from a flight and is greeted by her pregnant friend Heidi. Candice learns the baby isn't the man Heidi married but a pilot she met during Katrina. I loved the twists from their on. Candice hates Heidi's husband Sam and we learn why. Your descriptive scheme and dialogue are well executed. I liked this paragraph:
Having worked in the department for six years, I'd called my ex-boss and explained the situation to him. Knowing Sam's habits of contacting one of the escort services whenever he visited L.A, it was easy to use one of their undercover operatives. As soon as he handed her the money, the team moved in and made the arrest. Score one for the home team.
I loved the betray, revenge, and drama in your excellent story. The pilot turned out to be Candice's half brother.
I have a feeling I know who wrote this. Great story with many twists and turns
Melissa.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
|
Writer.
I enjoyed reading your fantastic story "You're Caught!" Candice arrives from a flight and is greeted by her pregnant friend Heidi. Candice learns the baby isn't the man Heidi married but a pilot she met during Katrina. I loved the twists from their on. Candice hates Heidi's husband Sam and we learn why. Your descriptive scheme and dialogue are well executed. I liked this paragraph:
Having worked in the department for six years, I'd called my ex-boss and explained the situation to him. Knowing Sam's habits of contacting one of the escort services whenever he visited L.A, it was easy to use one of their undercover operatives. As soon as he handed her the money, the team moved in and made the arrest. Score one for the home team.
I loved the betray, revenge, and drama in your excellent story. The pilot turned out to be Candice's half brother.
I have a feeling I know who wrote this. Great story with many twists and turns
Melissa.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
-
Melissa
Hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you for the wonderful review and for taking the time to read my story. Smiles to you,
Comment from jayesnb
This story had some ins and outs for sure.. I liked the way you did it in the end..And how her step brother ended up being the babys father..good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
|
This story had some ins and outs for sure.. I liked the way you did it in the end..And how her step brother ended up being the babys father..good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
-
jayesnb
I appreciate your thoughts and the review. Smiles to you,
Comment from Frances Jean
Well done - a supurb piece of writing. Great story and unexpected turn of events. I enjoyed it immensely. All the best in the competition. Frances
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
|
Well done - a supurb piece of writing. Great story and unexpected turn of events. I enjoyed it immensely. All the best in the competition. Frances
Comment Written 20-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2010
-
Frances,
Thank you so much for taking the time to read my story and for enjoying it. I appreciate your comments. Smiles to you,
Comment from skye
Wow and wow and double wow.
You wrote a fantastic "friend" story, with all the ups and downs, tangles, and weaves one could hope for.
The ending is superb.
Very well done.
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2010
|
Wow and wow and double wow.
You wrote a fantastic "friend" story, with all the ups and downs, tangles, and weaves one could hope for.
The ending is superb.
Very well done.
Comment Written 19-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2010
-
Skye
Awesome...I'm thrilled that you enjoyed this story. It was fun to write and I too surprised myself with all the twists. Smiles to you...
Comment from wierdgrace
What a great story for this contest, the emotional feelings as you read makes you want to read on to the end, I did not see any errors and no revisions, and the ending is awesome, good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2010
|
What a great story for this contest, the emotional feelings as you read makes you want to read on to the end, I did not see any errors and no revisions, and the ending is awesome, good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2010
-
Wierdgrace
Thank you so much for the kind review. I am glad that you enjoyed the story. Carol
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
A riveting and very well-written story for the contest. Great detail and descriptives used made it interesting beginning to end. What a surprise ending! Great job. Good luck in the contest. Hugs and smiles, Susanne
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2010
|
A riveting and very well-written story for the contest. Great detail and descriptives used made it interesting beginning to end. What a surprise ending! Great job. Good luck in the contest. Hugs and smiles, Susanne
Comment Written 18-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2010
-
Susanne
Glad you enjoyed the story. It was fun to write. Smiles to you,