Heart Crafted Poems - 2022
Viewing comments for Chapter 64 "Homeward Bound"Musings of an old man - 2022
28 total reviews
Comment from royowen
You could classify this as a Kyrielle, because of the repeating last line, and you've got other repeats, and if you had a plan for it, could have turned it into a new form, but beautifully written Jim, good scribing, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
  |
You could classify this as a Kyrielle, because of the repeating last line, and you've got other repeats, and if you had a plan for it, could have turned it into a new form, but beautifully written Jim, good scribing, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 21-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
-
Thank you, Roy, I never thought to consider a new format ... humm. I was so caught up with the graphic.
-
Well done
-
Well done
Comment from Tina Crute
Your poem has a calm presentation with wonderings that wander down the page. I feel like I took a walk through your thoughts. This was very effective and well written. I love the mix of the modern word, newbie, with the older language ofhithet heavenward hope I.
Lovely:)
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
|
Your poem has a calm presentation with wonderings that wander down the page. I feel like I took a walk through your thoughts. This was very effective and well written. I love the mix of the modern word, newbie, with the older language ofhithet heavenward hope I.
Lovely:)
Comment Written 20-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
-
Tina, thank you so much!
-
You are welcome. It was an experience!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
We'd never stop learning do we and even when we think we have experience we find out that we know very little. As you say, we find the world puzzling and we marvel at it too, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
|
We'd never stop learning do we and even when we think we have experience we find out that we know very little. As you say, we find the world puzzling and we marvel at it too, love Dolly x
Comment Written 20-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
-
Thank you Dolly, your new look is so roaring 20's, makes me smile.
-
Ha ha ha, glad. you like it x x x
Comment from K.L. Rockquemore
This is well-written and presented. I love the format as it creates
a metre that flows smoothly like water moving across tinted glass.
As an actual newbie, (have been writing poetry for 5 months now),
I am unfamiliar with this style of poetry but I have a positive reaction
to it. I will have to give it a try.
This is a thought provoking and intriguing piece that leaves the reader
to decipher the meaning on their own. I think it is a creative club entry.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
|
This is well-written and presented. I love the format as it creates
a metre that flows smoothly like water moving across tinted glass.
As an actual newbie, (have been writing poetry for 5 months now),
I am unfamiliar with this style of poetry but I have a positive reaction
to it. I will have to give it a try.
This is a thought provoking and intriguing piece that leaves the reader
to decipher the meaning on their own. I think it is a creative club entry.
Comment Written 20-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2022
-
K.L. Thank you and I did not realize you are new to FS, so belated welcome! This is a modified Kyrielle, because of the repeating last line (with a slight twist) I was going for a more sing-song flow. Where the last two lines in each stanza would be harmonized.
Comment from lyenochka
Those are some good repeating refrains. And as we age, we do think more about Heaven and realizing that we are not "newbies" any longer. But it's a good thing to be full of wonder and be thankful for life.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
|
Those are some good repeating refrains. And as we age, we do think more about Heaven and realizing that we are not "newbies" any longer. But it's a good thing to be full of wonder and be thankful for life.
Comment Written 20-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
-
Thanks much!
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a great job summing up what one was thinking, JLR.
Your repeated line ties everything together and makes readers
thinks. Your words were well chosen and believable. I believe
this is one idea many think of often. I liked the color scheme, too.
Thanks for participating, Jan
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
|
You did a great job summing up what one was thinking, JLR.
Your repeated line ties everything together and makes readers
thinks. Your words were well chosen and believable. I believe
this is one idea many think of often. I liked the color scheme, too.
Thanks for participating, Jan
Comment Written 20-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
-
Thank you Jan!
Comment from karenina
Your repeating lines are very effective--creating a lyrical tone that calls me to reflect on my own choices, both as a writer and a human on this planet.
It does seem that our quest to write, to explore, to give and take in kind, is always just out of reach of our fingertips! I found this poem to be motivational. None of us can fall back on being newbies. With each day lived we should be stretching to be our best selves!
Karenina
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
|
Your repeating lines are very effective--creating a lyrical tone that calls me to reflect on my own choices, both as a writer and a human on this planet.
It does seem that our quest to write, to explore, to give and take in kind, is always just out of reach of our fingertips! I found this poem to be motivational. None of us can fall back on being newbies. With each day lived we should be stretching to be our best selves!
Karenina
Comment Written 20-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
-
Karenina, I smiled back in total agreement, thank you! 🙏🙏
-
No, thank YOU!
Comment from Janet Foor
Excellent poem for this artwork. I loved the repeating refrain that kept the momentum of the poem going and looking forward - heavenward, hope I too.
Well done.
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
|
Excellent poem for this artwork. I loved the repeating refrain that kept the momentum of the poem going and looking forward - heavenward, hope I too.
Well done.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 20-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
-
Janet, my sincere thank you! Jim
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
A beautiful poem about thoughts of heaven and death. We all do it.
The repetition gives the poem a lyrical feeling.
I enjoyed reading it. I also enjoyed your unique style and well chosen words.
Good presentation Your writing flows naturally and it's easy to understand.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
|
A beautiful poem about thoughts of heaven and death. We all do it.
The repetition gives the poem a lyrical feeling.
I enjoyed reading it. I also enjoyed your unique style and well chosen words.
Good presentation Your writing flows naturally and it's easy to understand.
Comment Written 20-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
-
Gypsy Blue Rose, my sincere thank you! Jim
Comment from Teri7
This is a very interesting and well written poem you have penned for the Picture This club entry. You used very good descriptive words and words with hope for a very good ending to life in Heaven. Best wishes in the contest. Teri
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
|
This is a very interesting and well written poem you have penned for the Picture This club entry. You used very good descriptive words and words with hope for a very good ending to life in Heaven. Best wishes in the contest. Teri
Comment Written 20-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2022
-
Thanks for your comments, Teri!
-
You are so welcome!