Reviews from

Just Like Me From Aa to Zz

Viewing comments for Chapter 23 "Won-il and Willow Woo (Korea)"
Poetry for Children

14 total reviews 
Comment from Pearl Edwards
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Cute story of these Korean twins Won-il and Willow a twosome who are a bit too together for Won. Another fun read for page 23, well done Wendy,
cheers,
valda

 Comment Written 20-Jun-2017


reply by the author on 20-Jun-2017
    Yes, I think for some twins it is waaaay too much. I'm glad you had fun with them. - Wendy
Comment from strandregs
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oh the things you can see
when two come to tea
very nice ly done
I would have probably done
Wagon lost it's wheel
it was a sorry sight and deal
Wonky wagon wonders nowhere
cause it lost a crucial sphere.

the last part is really good.:-))Z.

 Comment Written 18-Jun-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2017
    Woo-woo. I'm glad you liked it but think between us we have used up all the available W's. Hope the other folks on the site didn't need any today. - Wendy
reply by strandregs on 25-Jun-2017
    Wriggling his nose
    wrinkling his forehead
    He wrealy wondered why
    Wheat subdued his wit.
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
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I love the way you did the finishing sentences piece. I knew conjoined twins that did this very thing. Amazing. Excellent rhyme and perfect flow

 Comment Written 18-Jun-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2017
    Thanks, Barb. I had a set of twins as friends, Denise and Diane who fought like cats and dogs, but also finished sentences for each other. They were definitely part of the inspiration for this piece. One to go ! - Wendy
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
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Yes my friend this is well written and an enjoyable read I love the rhyming and creativity of the poem well done again my friend regards Jill

 Comment Written 18-Jun-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2017
    Thank you Jill. Only one left to put together. She is over in the corner pouting and not at all cooperative. I will have words with her when she comes out of her snit. - Wendy
Comment from Dawn Munro
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LOL - This is a lovely, fun poem that kiddies will enjoy, I'm sure. I might have added a few commas - after "bright" (S2, L2) and here - (S2, L3 - after "something"). I'd also place a comma after "deep" (S3, L3), and here - after "everywhere" (S4, L3).

I would omit the comma here - after "hopes" (S6, L1) and use a semi-colon after "matchy-match" (S5, L1). (But then punctuation is up to the poet I guess...??)

Anyway, those are my only suggestions. I hope they're helpful. :) It's a wonderful poem.

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2017
    You are always helpful Dawn. It is nice to know that there are folks actually reading these with an eye to helping with spag. I will go back and take another look to see if I can spruce the twins up. - Wendy
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
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Terrific! Bravo, Wendy. You've done it again. Just one thing to fix. The picture shows the word TO on the second balloon. In your text, you used AND. Since this will confuse kids learning to read, you might want to change your text to use TO, as in the picture.

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2017
    Thanks so much for pointing that out. I think there was such a rush to get this out that neither Lynn or I were looking at anything but the whole, not specifics. I have gone in and fixed it and feel so relieved that someone has my back. - Wendy
Comment from frierajac
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I like your poem a lot. It reminds me of a famous poem about Siamese twins,
an actual case in the past century. A famous poet, R.S. Gwyn wrote it as a
first in a long career. It is a shape poem, with the outline of the twins in the shape
of the persons who were connected their entire lives I fond it in a book, or I would copy it for you. I believe they were Asian descent.

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2017
    I'm so glad you enjoyed the poem and I appreciate your taking the time to read and review it. I will see if I can find that poem somewhere. You have piqued my interest. - Wendy
Comment from nancy_e_davis
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I don't blame Won for feeling put upon. He needs a little space and who can blame him. Everyone needs to be alone occasionally. This is a well written poem Wendy. Good imagery.
"and then this two-too-much will end" VERY clever.
Nice addition to the book. NAncy

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2017
    I think perhaps poor Won-il is feeling better now that someone has vented for him. I am glad you found my W kids entertaining.- Wendy
Comment from Kerry Foley
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Awe...This is such a cute poem, Wendy. You do a great job on your alphabet poetry always. You chose a perfect picture. ~Kerry

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2017
    Thanks Kerry. I am grateful to Lynn Hunt for coming up with the accompanying art is such splendid fashion. Just one more to write now that Vevina Vallelly has been posted. - Wendy
reply by Kerry Foley on 19-Jun-2017
    I look forward to it.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
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A very well-written poem about the Korean twins. Willow is excited about het brother Won who us her brother and friend. She is happy to do everything with him, but Won want more freedom to do his own things.

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2017


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2017
    I am so glad you were Wooed by my little twins. I appreciate your continued reading and reviewing of my work. - Wendy