The Clock
5-7-5 Poem19 total reviews
Comment from Soulester
I love it....the ticking footsteps of time. Your 5-7-5 really caught my fancy. Good form and the rhyme is a clever addition to the classic form. Nice job!
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
  |
I love it....the ticking footsteps of time. Your 5-7-5 really caught my fancy. Good form and the rhyme is a clever addition to the classic form. Nice job!
Comment Written 09-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
-
Thanks very much.
Comment from Schalk Jacobs
Very well written. I especially enjoyed your second line. That was a very powerful part of your poem and worked brilliantly in cementing the whole poem. All the best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
|
Very well written. I especially enjoyed your second line. That was a very powerful part of your poem and worked brilliantly in cementing the whole poem. All the best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 09-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much for your lovely review.
Comment from nelliesellie
I love the picture. I love grandfather clocks. They mark the time off with a lovely sound. It reminds me of my ancestors time. The grandfather clock helps make time a friend. Good work. Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
|
I love the picture. I love grandfather clocks. They mark the time off with a lovely sound. It reminds me of my ancestors time. The grandfather clock helps make time a friend. Good work. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
-
T.hank you very much for reading and reviewing
Comment from tfawcus
'The footsteps of time' is such a compelling image. I can just imagine the slow tick of an old grandfather clock in an otherwise silent rom! You have created the scene beautifully!
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
|
'The footsteps of time' is such a compelling image. I can just imagine the slow tick of an old grandfather clock in an otherwise silent rom! You have created the scene beautifully!
Comment Written 08-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much for this beautiful review.
Comment from Smoothiecool
great picture for your poem
good luck in the contest
your 5-7-5 has the required components
the three line count
the required 17 syllable count
your few words allow the reader to see and feel time pass bye with every tick of the clock
good alliteration in
"the" 'tick'
"closer" " click"
cheers Smoothiecool
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
|
great picture for your poem
good luck in the contest
your 5-7-5 has the required components
the three line count
the required 17 syllable count
your few words allow the reader to see and feel time pass bye with every tick of the clock
good alliteration in
"the" 'tick'
"closer" " click"
cheers Smoothiecool
Comment Written 08-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much for reading and giving me these wonderful words.
-
most welcome
cheers Smoothiecool
Comment from adewpearl
Your poem is in excellent 5/7/5 syllable count
good consonance of hard C sounds in clock tick closer click
I like the personification of Time and the effect it has on the message you are delivering
about the finite nature of our lives
Brooke
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
|
Your poem is in excellent 5/7/5 syllable count
good consonance of hard C sounds in clock tick closer click
I like the personification of Time and the effect it has on the message you are delivering
about the finite nature of our lives
Brooke
Comment Written 08-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much ,brooke.
Comment from GWHARGIS
This was pretty deep. It was only three lines but the sentiments and emotional weight of this was fantastic. I liked the personification of the time. Nicely done.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
|
This was pretty deep. It was only three lines but the sentiments and emotional weight of this was fantastic. I liked the personification of the time. Nicely done.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much for reading and appreciating my poem.
Comment from skye
Look at the clock tick
Hear the footsteps of Time come
Closer with each click
Wonderful art choice and a poem filled with terrific words that bring the images to life -- tick click clock.
Well done.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
|
Look at the clock tick
Hear the footsteps of Time come
Closer with each click
Wonderful art choice and a poem filled with terrific words that bring the images to life -- tick click clock.
Well done.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much for this lovely review.
Comment from mfowler
This works well poetically and structurally for the prompt requirements. I think that rhyme in line 1 and 3 have a real purpose in giving the sense of clock time. It's almost onomatopoeic. Your middle line is the winner for me, where I think that concept of human movement and the progress of time is beautifully summed up in your metaphor.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
|
This works well poetically and structurally for the prompt requirements. I think that rhyme in line 1 and 3 have a real purpose in giving the sense of clock time. It's almost onomatopoeic. Your middle line is the winner for me, where I think that concept of human movement and the progress of time is beautifully summed up in your metaphor.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much for reading and giving this very good analytical review.
Comment from rouskin
Very well written with a smooth flow of words which fit the contest rules. Best of luck in your contest I enjoyed reading it very much
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
|
Very well written with a smooth flow of words which fit the contest rules. Best of luck in your contest I enjoyed reading it very much
Comment Written 08-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2014
-
Thank you very much for enjoying my poem.