I Knew Better.
Living & dying with the haunting ghosts of addiction...102 total reviews
Comment from mfowler
Nice one. You thrive on these prompts. The verse flows smoothly, the voice is ghostlike (if there is such a thing), and the reasons behind the death frightening. I thought your title was ominous and an important element in telling the tale of a heroin induced death. Well told narrative in good verse, with all the usual flair in presntation. Good Luck.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
Nice one. You thrive on these prompts. The verse flows smoothly, the voice is ghostlike (if there is such a thing), and the reasons behind the death frightening. I thought your title was ominous and an important element in telling the tale of a heroin induced death. Well told narrative in good verse, with all the usual flair in presntation. Good Luck.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
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Not thriving all that much in this contest, Mark. Floundering would be a more appropriate word based on the way it is performing. I was inspired to write it after I'd heard about Robin Williams suicide, and it caused me to think about the pain and heartache of addiction. I really appreciate the review.
Comment from ProjectBluebook
A nice blend of words. A deadly concoction. A cocktail of death, administered via a needle. Very spooky image. Looks like Fairuza, the water witch I dreamed about... Looks like a good contender for this contest Namasta created. Good job on her part. Count your doubloon, Spook-a-Doo, Boo...
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
A nice blend of words. A deadly concoction. A cocktail of death, administered via a needle. Very spooky image. Looks like Fairuza, the water witch I dreamed about... Looks like a good contender for this contest Namasta created. Good job on her part. Count your doubloon, Spook-a-Doo, Boo...
Comment Written 13-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
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Thanks, Do Loco, but I can't count them just yet. I am getting my booty spanked in the booth! I am really glad that you liked it, however, and I appreciate your kind comments and review.
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Been editing. Almost through with another chapter. good luck...
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Thanks! :}
Comment from artisart4u
Your poem fits the description of supernatural.
It is nicely written and I like the font.
Good luck with your poem.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
Your poem fits the description of supernatural.
It is nicely written and I like the font.
Good luck with your poem.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
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Thanks so much for your encouraging review, artisart4u. I only wish more voters felt as you do, LOL.
Much appreciated, my friend. :D
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hey-O,
Well, you had me. I did not expect heroin to cause her demise. Wasn't sure what it might be, but not that. As always, excellent formatting and presentation.
Very well done! Good luck in the contest.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'.... Jax ('^')
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
Hey-O,
Well, you had me. I did not expect heroin to cause her demise. Wasn't sure what it might be, but not that. As always, excellent formatting and presentation.
Very well done! Good luck in the contest.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'.... Jax ('^')
Comment Written 13-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
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Thanks, Jax. I am really glad you enjoyed the poem. I only wish More voters did, it is doing horribly in the contest voting. Your review was encouraging, however, and I sincerely appreciate it!
Comment from Joan E.
Sounds a bit like an ode to Robin Williams. We may never know the full story, but I hope discussions about his illness bring light to those in darkness. Your alliteration of "g's" and "p's" added to the intensity of your message. -Joan
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
Sounds a bit like an ode to Robin Williams. We may never know the full story, but I hope discussions about his illness bring light to those in darkness. Your alliteration of "g's" and "p's" added to the intensity of your message. -Joan
Comment Written 13-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
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Well, you are right, Joan E., I was thinking of Robin Williams as I wrote this. Perhaps I should have been more specific, like my competitor who is trouncing me in this contest right now. However, I wanted it to cover a broader spectrum than just one man's plight, for there are many who struggle with addictions each and every day of their lives. This is dedicated to everyone has has to battle such demons haunting them.
I truly appreciate your encouraging review. I really needed it!
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I think your broader approach was a wise choice and wish you well in the competition. Cheers- Joan
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Thanks, Joan, but I just came in second about an hour ago. You win some, you lose some...:}
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Second is something to be proud of too! -Joan
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Yeah, but it doesn't help your member dollar account too much, LOL...
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I've been there often--my only recourse has been to post fewer poems! ;( -J
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I'll try that.:}
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I'm not sure I'm a good role model--I just had to moderate my behavior, since there isn't enough time to do everything! Good luck and happy weekend- Joan
Comment from kiwisteveh
Eight lines must have cramped your style a bit - talking of authors who virtually sign their work with a distinctive touch!
This has a nice spooky feel to it and an unexpected yet suitably horrifying ending. Unless you had something even weirder in mind you probably injected heroin rather than heroine...
Good luck in the contest
K
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
Eight lines must have cramped your style a bit - talking of authors who virtually sign their work with a distinctive touch!
This has a nice spooky feel to it and an unexpected yet suitably horrifying ending. Unless you had something even weirder in mind you probably injected heroin rather than heroine...
Good luck in the contest
K
Comment Written 13-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2014
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Ha ha, I fixed that typo, Steve. Yeah, it would be kind of hard to inject a feminine hero. She'd most likely kick your arse if you tried, heh-heh What the hell was I thinkin'?
Comment from acerisestory
You definitely got my attention with this short but impactful poem! It's scary with a strong and cautionary message.
Your poem has a great flow with perfect rhyming. Good use of alliteration with graveyard gates and peer pressure. This line got me:
purgatory, my soul awaits
Good luck in the contest -- a strong entry. Alana
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2014
You definitely got my attention with this short but impactful poem! It's scary with a strong and cautionary message.
Your poem has a great flow with perfect rhyming. Good use of alliteration with graveyard gates and peer pressure. This line got me:
purgatory, my soul awaits
Good luck in the contest -- a strong entry. Alana
Comment Written 13-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2014
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Thanks so much for your encouraging review, Alana. I truly appreciate that!
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You are welcome! Alana
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
This is a great horror story - well displayed 'as usual!' - creepy, the subject of this poem 'should have known better - clever topical subject enough to frighten off potential partakers of the 'stuff'. Anon, but in this case the writer is stamped all over this. LOL. Kind regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2014
This is a great horror story - well displayed 'as usual!' - creepy, the subject of this poem 'should have known better - clever topical subject enough to frighten off potential partakers of the 'stuff'. Anon, but in this case the writer is stamped all over this. LOL. Kind regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 13-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2014
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Dang, Dorothy. Even when I don't include the intricate animations and photos, people figure out who I am. So I figured, what the heck, if they're going to recognize me anyway, I might as well present my poetry the way I feel it gives the most bang-for-the-buck.
Thanks so much for your kind comments and very thoughtful review, my friend.
Comment from granny goes viral
Oh my goodness. From the horrific visual to the sad sad message, no answers, only questions. That is addiction, no answers, only questions. You did a good job.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2014
Oh my goodness. From the horrific visual to the sad sad message, no answers, only questions. That is addiction, no answers, only questions. You did a good job.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2014
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Thanks so much, granny goes viral. I really appreciate the encouraging review, my friend!:}
Comment from RYME4U
This is a real eye opener. Well done and well expressed. The eerie illustrations add to the meaning of the well chosen descriptions you have used. Good job!
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2014
This is a real eye opener. Well done and well expressed. The eerie illustrations add to the meaning of the well chosen descriptions you have used. Good job!
Comment Written 13-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2014
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Thanks very much for your encouraging review, RHYME4U. I sincerely appreciate it!