Top of the Mountain
Hug them, squeeze them, love them . . . every day.180 total reviews
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
How can that be? You, you who have had such a lousy childhood to have your dear only son taken from you! Life is so unfair, Bob, I cry for you, I can feel every ounce of yours and your wife's despair. How terribly cruel. I am so very sorry, my dear friend. The vicar was right, nothing, no pain, no sadness could come close compare to losing a child. There is nothing else I can say, except I am so sorry for your terrible loss. xxxx Sandra xxxx
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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How can that be? You, you who have had such a lousy childhood to have your dear only son taken from you! Life is so unfair, Bob, I cry for you, I can feel every ounce of yours and your wife's despair. How terribly cruel. I am so very sorry, my dear friend. The vicar was right, nothing, no pain, no sadness could come close compare to losing a child. There is nothing else I can say, except I am so sorry for your terrible loss. xxxx Sandra xxxx
Comment Written 25-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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My wonderful and dear friend, Sandra. Thanks so much for your understanding. Even though it happened in 1981, I still feel it the worst on Holidays and his birthday month February. Blessings. XX Bob
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I can understand that, certain anniversary's can be the most painful of occasions. Take care, my friend. xx
Comment from jmdg1954
Dam you, Bob. I think this is the third or fourth time I read this story and I've stayed strong until the priest tells you of "the top of the mountain", then the tears started flowing.
We lost our first born, 3/14/1981, forty-five minutes after birth. We've visited her grave every year since then.
Heartbreaking... take care my friend. John
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Dam you, Bob. I think this is the third or fourth time I read this story and I've stayed strong until the priest tells you of "the top of the mountain", then the tears started flowing.
We lost our first born, 3/14/1981, forty-five minutes after birth. We've visited her grave every year since then.
Heartbreaking... take care my friend. John
Comment Written 25-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Where have you been, John? Thanks so much for the look and comments. Bless you and yours. Bob
Comment from Mark Valentine
No words. The writing is superb but it seems too trivial to comment on it because the story itself is unimaginably sad and moving. This story is a lesson in perspective - in being able to see what is really important in life.
God Bless, my friend. I'm going to go hug my son right now.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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No words. The writing is superb but it seems too trivial to comment on it because the story itself is unimaginably sad and moving. This story is a lesson in perspective - in being able to see what is really important in life.
God Bless, my friend. I'm going to go hug my son right now.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Thank you, Mark. Yes, you have the right idea. God Bless you and yours forever. Bob
Comment from Ulla
My God, Bob, I am so sorry. I cried when I read this and had to wait a little while before I was able to come back and comment. What a tragedy. Something that will never leave you. You may learn to live with it, but I'm sure it will stay with you forever. My daughter was born that same year, the only one I ever had. But of course how irrelevant is that, other than to say as a mother I can identify. Your piece is so beautifully written. It comes from the heart. Thanks for sharing something that must be so very painful. Best regards. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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My God, Bob, I am so sorry. I cried when I read this and had to wait a little while before I was able to come back and comment. What a tragedy. Something that will never leave you. You may learn to live with it, but I'm sure it will stay with you forever. My daughter was born that same year, the only one I ever had. But of course how irrelevant is that, other than to say as a mother I can identify. Your piece is so beautifully written. It comes from the heart. Thanks for sharing something that must be so very painful. Best regards. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 25-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Thank you, Ulla. I appreciate your review and most of all your understanding commentary. Bless you, my dear friend. Bob
Comment from Benny Beeharry
Hi friend, this is the saddest writing I have read so far, and it is really heart breaking. Whatever the neighbours say, or the priest there is nothing like the pain and suffering you and your wife were going through. How can someone forget . Christmas will come andChristmas will go the tree will stay there.
God bless you two ?
Dany Jock
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Hi friend, this is the saddest writing I have read so far, and it is really heart breaking. Whatever the neighbours say, or the priest there is nothing like the pain and suffering you and your wife were going through. How can someone forget . Christmas will come andChristmas will go the tree will stay there.
God bless you two ?
Dany Jock
Comment Written 25-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Thanks so much, Danny. I appreciate your time and understanding. Bob
Comment from Dean Kuch
Or, the eight years I spent on active duty as a U.S. Marine. That will change you a tad. ...Hah, no shit; that's an understatement if ever I've heard one.
It certainly changed me, Bob...
We try to remember the good things and purposely "shove the unpleasant ones out of our minds." Those that we attempt to dismiss, however, are the happenings we will never forget. ... I must be a bit unusual, Bob. I guess that goes without saying, really. But I don't try and shove the traumatic experiences out of my mind, nor do I want to forget them.
I embrace them, welcome them, and I do so because they are all a part of who I am today. A lot of our misery we bring upon ourselves. If we forget what placed us in a rather precarious situation where something bad occurred--ignoring the mistakes we made, for example-- then we'll only be doomed to repeat those mistakes again...
"You will never suffer like this again. You see, you folks have been to the top of the mountain. There is nothing -- absolutely nothing worse than losing a child--an only child at that. When I say you have been to the top of the mountain, I am saying that nothing in your life will ever hurt as much as burying Bobby. You will be able to handle anything that comes your way for the rest of your life. You may not understand this now, but someday you will . . . ...Father Drew Harding sounds as if he was a very wise man, Bob, almost as if he'd been right where you and your wife were at that very moment during one point and time in his life.
Jeezus pleezus, Bob. I had no idea you had lost a son, not to mention your only child!
I know it's been years ago, but I am truly sorry for your and your wife's loss.
That call, the one from Harper Grace Hospital's emergency room on the day of Bobby's accident, is the sort of telephone call all parents with children--especially teenage--children, fear and dread.
Bobby was a very handsome young man, and he looked extremely happy.
Thanks for sharing this very personal story again with all, of us.
It really makes you stop and think if you have kids just how lucky you really are...
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Or, the eight years I spent on active duty as a U.S. Marine. That will change you a tad. ...Hah, no shit; that's an understatement if ever I've heard one.
It certainly changed me, Bob...
We try to remember the good things and purposely "shove the unpleasant ones out of our minds." Those that we attempt to dismiss, however, are the happenings we will never forget. ... I must be a bit unusual, Bob. I guess that goes without saying, really. But I don't try and shove the traumatic experiences out of my mind, nor do I want to forget them.
I embrace them, welcome them, and I do so because they are all a part of who I am today. A lot of our misery we bring upon ourselves. If we forget what placed us in a rather precarious situation where something bad occurred--ignoring the mistakes we made, for example-- then we'll only be doomed to repeat those mistakes again...
"You will never suffer like this again. You see, you folks have been to the top of the mountain. There is nothing -- absolutely nothing worse than losing a child--an only child at that. When I say you have been to the top of the mountain, I am saying that nothing in your life will ever hurt as much as burying Bobby. You will be able to handle anything that comes your way for the rest of your life. You may not understand this now, but someday you will . . . ...Father Drew Harding sounds as if he was a very wise man, Bob, almost as if he'd been right where you and your wife were at that very moment during one point and time in his life.
Jeezus pleezus, Bob. I had no idea you had lost a son, not to mention your only child!
I know it's been years ago, but I am truly sorry for your and your wife's loss.
That call, the one from Harper Grace Hospital's emergency room on the day of Bobby's accident, is the sort of telephone call all parents with children--especially teenage--children, fear and dread.
Bobby was a very handsome young man, and he looked extremely happy.
Thanks for sharing this very personal story again with all, of us.
It really makes you stop and think if you have kids just how lucky you really are...
Comment Written 25-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Thanks so much my dear friend. I appreciate your thinking and feelings about life. Bless you, Always, Semper Fi Bob
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Semper Fi, Bob.
You're welcome.
~Deano
Comment from mbroyles2
Oh Wow!
I can't imagine the pain.
I have three children, all of which are my world.
I couldn't even think about being in that place where a child has died.
I admire your courage to share this story with us.
It is so beautifully written.
Though it has been over thirty-five years, nothing will ever ease the pain I'm sure.
Thank you for sharing this with us, Bob.
God Bless.
Michael
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Oh Wow!
I can't imagine the pain.
I have three children, all of which are my world.
I couldn't even think about being in that place where a child has died.
I admire your courage to share this story with us.
It is so beautifully written.
Though it has been over thirty-five years, nothing will ever ease the pain I'm sure.
Thank you for sharing this with us, Bob.
God Bless.
Michael
Comment Written 25-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Hi, Mike. I wrote this about seven years ago, I think. It happened in 1981. His birthday is February 21. I always feel a tug this time of year. Christmas can be a bear too. Bless you and yours always, Mike. Bob
Comment from Bill Schott
Telling that story was hard, I'm certain. You intimated your guilt, or remorse, in not talking further to your son, after the bowling ball bag issue had come up. Small matters compared to life and death, that wear at us when we relive and re-evaluate our decisions. I can only imagine a gut-wrenching and inconsolable loss like that. I see that your son's birthday might well be the reason that this story has been brought back for us to read at this time. I am so very sorry that this tragedy came to you and your family. The telling of this personal part of your life was done with a lot of honesty, set down in a well-structured narrative that led to the event, and kept the tension rising and abating as we read through the phone call, hospital, funeral, and resolution.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Telling that story was hard, I'm certain. You intimated your guilt, or remorse, in not talking further to your son, after the bowling ball bag issue had come up. Small matters compared to life and death, that wear at us when we relive and re-evaluate our decisions. I can only imagine a gut-wrenching and inconsolable loss like that. I see that your son's birthday might well be the reason that this story has been brought back for us to read at this time. I am so very sorry that this tragedy came to you and your family. The telling of this personal part of your life was done with a lot of honesty, set down in a well-structured narrative that led to the event, and kept the tension rising and abating as we read through the phone call, hospital, funeral, and resolution.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2017
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Thanks so much, Bill. I appreciate your time and your wonderfully inspirational remarks. (the six stars too) Blessings,, Bob
Comment from Ric Myworld
Congratulations on the contest win! But most of all, thanks for sharing such a tragic personal story. A heartbreak that I'm sure replays every day of a parent's life, with a hurt that can never heal. I wish I had a six. God bless, my friend!
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2017
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Congratulations on the contest win! But most of all, thanks for sharing such a tragic personal story. A heartbreak that I'm sure replays every day of a parent's life, with a hurt that can never heal. I wish I had a six. God bless, my friend!
Comment Written 25-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2017
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Hi, Don. Stars matter not with this post. I guess it's just a way of venting. This time of year the realization comes flooding back. His birth month. I originally posted this about six years ago. Thank you foryour sentiments and bless you and yours always. Bob
Comment from judiverse
If my math is correct, he would have been 50 this month. Even the passage of times doesn't eliminate the pain. There must have been so many "what if's" going through your mind. If only he hadn't gotten a ride with the kid, if only he'd put the bowling ball in the trunk, and on and on. What a terrible tragedy to go through, and you have an excellent description of what your wife was feeling and your attempts to reassure her. It's marvelous how a community can come together in these times, as you witnessed. Wonderfully told, and what a tragic experience to have to go through. judi
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2017
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If my math is correct, he would have been 50 this month. Even the passage of times doesn't eliminate the pain. There must have been so many "what if's" going through your mind. If only he hadn't gotten a ride with the kid, if only he'd put the bowling ball in the trunk, and on and on. What a terrible tragedy to go through, and you have an excellent description of what your wife was feeling and your attempts to reassure her. It's marvelous how a community can come together in these times, as you witnessed. Wonderfully told, and what a tragic experience to have to go through. judi
Comment Written 25-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2017
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Thank you, Judi. I posted this about six years ago. Bobby's birthday is this month so I felt compelled to redo. Yes, as a matter of fact the guilt still haunts me from time to time. the what ifs are terrible. Your caring and understanding mean so much coming from a good friend like you even though we are miles apart. Bless you and yours. X Bob
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You're very welcome. The tragic event must come back very strongly when your son's birthday comes around. You and your wife found the strength to get through it, but you can't get rid of the memories. judi
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So true, Judi. Bob
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There's kind of a sense of togetherness in knowing that others go through these tragic loses. judi