Steve's Poems for Kids
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "Annabel"A collection of my children's poems
93 total reviews
Comment from mauial
Your poem has a good rhythmic flow to it. The overall thought comes through that giving in to the materialistic wants is a factor in spoilt brats.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
Your poem has a good rhythmic flow to it. The overall thought comes through that giving in to the materialistic wants is a factor in spoilt brats.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
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Thank you.
Steve
Comment from Heaven Bound
I really enjoyed this. It is clever and entertaining, and would do well for children. Excellent total presentation (picture and color combination).
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
I really enjoyed this. It is clever and entertaining, and would do well for children. Excellent total presentation (picture and color combination).
Comment Written 24-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
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Thank you - glad you enjoyed.
Steve
Comment from adewpearl
love her name
excellent abcb rhyme that adds to the humor with pairings like wazoo/too
good action verbs and alliteration in flew and flurried, scampered and scurried
I also like your internal rhymes in each C line
I love that her dolls had their own loo LOL
A fun poem, Steve :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
love her name
excellent abcb rhyme that adds to the humor with pairings like wazoo/too
good action verbs and alliteration in flew and flurried, scampered and scurried
I also like your internal rhymes in each C line
I love that her dolls had their own loo LOL
A fun poem, Steve :-) Brooke
Comment Written 24-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
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Thanks, Brooke. I thought I might make my spoilt kid a little different and not a brat, but no, the exploding Brianna had her covered.
Steve
Comment from Mara del Mar
I like this poem. This picture and color scheme of the poem give it greater impact. Adorable.
Reads and flows well and makes sense.
Good pacing and rhyming , very funny.
Good luck.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
I like this poem. This picture and color scheme of the poem give it greater impact. Adorable.
Reads and flows well and makes sense.
Good pacing and rhyming , very funny.
Good luck.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
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Thank you - contest is done and dusted with no glory for Annabel, unfortunately - but then she did get all the cake!
Steve
Comment from terry drake
I guess she had no stress when she undressed and slept like a babe in the nude. But her attitude proved to be rude as she gathered her things she thought best. Your poem was well written with a bounce to enjoy. Fun read.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
I guess she had no stress when she undressed and slept like a babe in the nude. But her attitude proved to be rude as she gathered her things she thought best. Your poem was well written with a bounce to enjoy. Fun read.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
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Thanks, Terry. Don't even want to think about the alarmingly overweight babe in the nude!
Steve
Comment from cvcopac
You do'm the best and manage, somehow, to make it look effortless. I know better. So I'll keep reviewing these exceptional works until you're one day banned for over-qualification. Very creative and imaginative, down to earth and whimsical. Best of luck in the contest. cvc
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
You do'm the best and manage, somehow, to make it look effortless. I know better. So I'll keep reviewing these exceptional works until you're one day banned for over-qualification. Very creative and imaginative, down to earth and whimsical. Best of luck in the contest. cvc
Comment Written 24-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
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Thank you - contest is done and dusted with no glory for Annabel, unfortunately - but then she did get all the cake!
Steve
Comment from justatuna
I thought this was a great poem. An excellent lesson for children. I don't give advice on structure as I'm no expert. But this seemed perfect. Very well done.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
I thought this was a great poem. An excellent lesson for children. I don't give advice on structure as I'm no expert. But this seemed perfect. Very well done.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
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Thank you!
Steve
Comment from c_lucas
This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is very good imagery. Good luck in your contest.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is very good imagery. Good luck in your contest.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
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Thank you - contest is done and dusted with no glory for Annabel, unfortunately - but then she did get all the cake!
Steve
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You're welcome, Steve. Charlie
Comment from rashi kumar
Some wonderful rhyming here!
Umpteenth wazoo! Nice sounds- a lounge and a loo!
Very well-written, funny yet irritates that how spoilt this Annabel was!
Pleasure to read:)
Namaste
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
Some wonderful rhyming here!
Umpteenth wazoo! Nice sounds- a lounge and a loo!
Very well-written, funny yet irritates that how spoilt this Annabel was!
Pleasure to read:)
Namaste
Comment Written 24-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
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Than you for your kind words.
Steve
Comment from bossladyone
I like this poem. It was fun and funny. It is well written and flows very well. You have fulfilled the challenge. This picture and color scheme of the poem give it greater impact. Thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
I like this poem. It was fun and funny. It is well written and flows very well. You have fulfilled the challenge. This picture and color scheme of the poem give it greater impact. Thank you for sharing
Comment Written 24-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2012
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Thank you.
Steve