Another Pretty Face
Viewing comments for Chapter 23 "Chapter 10; part one"Can love survive small town gossip?
64 total reviews
Comment from LadyWave
Glad to see another post from you! I hope Cassie never makes it onto the internet. I feel like the men are getting close to busting this open. Keep the action coming!
Noticed one thing:
"People from around the world buy [these videos on the internet]."
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2010
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Glad to see another post from you! I hope Cassie never makes it onto the internet. I feel like the men are getting close to busting this open. Keep the action coming!
Noticed one thing:
"People from around the world buy [these videos on the internet]."
Comment Written 07-Nov-2010
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2010
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I fixed that sentence, probably while you were reviewing. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Rama Rao
Another excellent chapter which had me riveted to it right until the last word. I like the way you present every scene to make it come alive. The story is progressing well.
However, I have a point about the use of the word 'kept woman'. Do you have kept woman in the USA? Do you use this word in your country? I have never come across such a word in any book.
Secondly, this sentence,"You're the first woman I've ever met that didn't think she could accept money from a man." I think it needs to be simplified. Kindly consider.
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2010
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Another excellent chapter which had me riveted to it right until the last word. I like the way you present every scene to make it come alive. The story is progressing well.
However, I have a point about the use of the word 'kept woman'. Do you have kept woman in the USA? Do you use this word in your country? I have never come across such a word in any book.
Secondly, this sentence,"You're the first woman I've ever met that didn't think she could accept money from a man." I think it needs to be simplified. Kindly consider.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2010
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2010
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Yes, we actually do have kept women. They are fee to come and go at will, but men will pay they rent and upkeep in return for sexual favors. I will look a the other sentence. I rushed to post or it wouldn't get posted until next weeken.
Comment from missy98writer
Barbara,
evil Eddy got you in this line: "It's not the computer's fault. She was na?ve and never suspected anything liked this could happen." Dani took Sara's hand. "This man's an expert at fooling unsuspecting teenage girls, but we'll find him." Chapter twenty-three is extremely well written. Your dialogue is excellent with great narrative. Dani brings Cassie's computer back. Great tension. I look forward to reading more. Your art work was lovely. Keep up the terrific writing, my friend. I pray you get to felling better. Love and kisses. . .Melissa!
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reply by the author on 07-Nov-2010
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Barbara,
evil Eddy got you in this line: "It's not the computer's fault. She was na?ve and never suspected anything liked this could happen." Dani took Sara's hand. "This man's an expert at fooling unsuspecting teenage girls, but we'll find him." Chapter twenty-three is extremely well written. Your dialogue is excellent with great narrative. Dani brings Cassie's computer back. Great tension. I look forward to reading more. Your art work was lovely. Keep up the terrific writing, my friend. I pray you get to felling better. Love and kisses. . .Melissa!
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Comment Written 07-Nov-2010
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2010
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Thank you I will kick evil eddies butt. Thank you for your kind review.
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Evil Eddy always gets me.
Melissa.
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
This is very well written and quite enjoyable. It holds the readers attention to the end. You might reread. I think there are a couple of typos. Glad your chemo went well. Good luck with the future treatment.
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reply by the author on 07-Nov-2010
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This is very well written and quite enjoyable. It holds the readers attention to the end. You might reread. I think there are a couple of typos. Glad your chemo went well. Good luck with the future treatment.
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Comment Written 07-Nov-2010
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2010
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I just evil eddie thought he needed to pay me a visit.