Reviews from

Another Pretty Face

Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "Chapter 5, part one"
Can love survive small town gossip?

81 total reviews 
Comment from lola29
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Barbara, this chapter was a wonderful read. I really garnered a sense of Sara's breakthroud into finding happiness with the incredible Joe Barnes. He is quite possible every woman's dream man. And I'm impressed with his caring about Cassie. Bravo!

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2010


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from gerry26
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You can really set up a scene. The baseball scene was just perfect. I was ready to stand up and cheer. You get your reader right into the center of the story. I am beginning to love these characters.

gerry

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2010


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from dmjones
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Barbara, I really enjoyed reading this chapter. It makes me so angry to see Sara feeling so insecure because of the past. Small towns can do that and gossip whether true or not can destroy a person's confidence. In lots of ways Sara reminds me of me. Excellent writing and spag free.

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2010


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2010
    Thank you for your kind review. And you are right, small towns can be extremely cruel. I grew up in on myself.
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Barbara,

Good scene setting chapter. Cassie obviously likes Joe and so does Sara, but he seems to have made a few enemies and I'd guess they'll hit back through Cassie and Sara.

One suggestion for you. There is a sudden anomaly in the tenses and this sentence is the key -

Realizing what she did, she ran toward the bedroom. - I'd suggest a change to -

Realizing what she'd just done, she blushed and ran toward the bedroom.
or

Realizing what she was doing, she flushed as she released him and ran toward the bedroom.

Patrick

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2010


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2010
    Thank you for catching that for me. I will fix that. I appreciate your review and continued support.
reply by Patrick G Cox on 15-Aug-2010
    My pleasure Barbara, I hope everything is moving forward in the right direction for you.

    Patrick
Comment from zoocq
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another great chapter...like I have stated before...I cannot wait for what comes next. I really admire your stamina to even write a chapter much less two and a short story. You are amazing!

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2010


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from dportwood
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

barbara.wilkey,

I enjoyed reading this story. The love story unfolds and gets mushier all the time. Your writing is so well done and not encumbered by errors. Well done.

Duane

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2010


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2010
    Thank you for your kind review and continued support.
Comment from marcii
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another delightful chapter, I haven't as yet read all your chapters though I feel from what I have read I at least know these three main characters pretty well thanks to your great descriptions and scenes.
Hope your life improves health wise.
Marcii

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2010


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2010
    Thank you for your well wishes. I appreciate your kind review and support.
Comment from toni guerrero
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I enjoyed reading your story. Good concised stetaments through out you story. Good topic and good vision of relationships. Thank you for sharing and keep up the good work.

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2010


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from irsajay
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Joe, Sara and Cassie are heading for an interesting 'Middle level conflict' and 'Rising Action'. I don't know what would happen, but something in the air, let reader to know-- What would happen to Joe. How Sara will come around and what Cassie will pose next.
Turning out a good work from an accomplished churner.

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2010


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2010
    Thank you for your kind review. I like your free thinking.
reply by irsajay on 15-Aug-2010
    You are welcome
Comment from Tellis
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This guy Joe is almost too good to be true. I hope the other shoe isn't about to fall. Lol I enjoyed reading this excellent story.

Tellis

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2010


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2010
    The other shoe will fall very soon. Thank you for your kind review.