Your Last Night
Free Verse51 total reviews
Comment from Dawn Munro
Oh God, Luna. I don't have words. Life can be such a f*cking horror show - I am so sorry. Please, please, please be okay. I honest-to-God believe things happen for a reason, even though we don't know what the reason is...
I have a story to share too, but I can't do it here.
I have to go out for groceries today. I'll pick up a calling card so I can call you.
XX Love,
Dawn
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Oh God, Luna. I don't have words. Life can be such a f*cking horror show - I am so sorry. Please, please, please be okay. I honest-to-God believe things happen for a reason, even though we don't know what the reason is...
I have a story to share too, but I can't do it here.
I have to go out for groceries today. I'll pick up a calling card so I can call you.
XX Love,
Dawn
Comment Written 05-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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I'm okay, Dawn. I'm a firm believer in things happen for a reason as well, but just have a hard time applying that to Mickey. I know it's true, though.
I look forward to hearing your story and I'll talk to you later.
Love you, sister,
jeni
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I'm glad you are okay. I forgot the calling card - by the time I got the shuttle back I was too sore to go out again. I'll try tomorrow - or you can call me anytime, right?
Comment from Dean Kuch
I can't express in mere words how deeply sorry I am that this happened to not only your son, but you and your entire family as well, Jeni.
As parents we were never meant to outlive our children.
At least I don't believe that's true.
It seems so unnatural, surreal; something no parent ever wants to nor should have to go through.
But many do, every...single...day.
You just happen to be one of them.
It is plainly evident this poem comes straight from your heart.
I say grieve 'til your hearts content if you want to. You've earned the right.
Just keep in mind that Mickey would like for you to be happy.
I'm quite sure of that.
~Dean
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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I can't express in mere words how deeply sorry I am that this happened to not only your son, but you and your entire family as well, Jeni.
As parents we were never meant to outlive our children.
At least I don't believe that's true.
It seems so unnatural, surreal; something no parent ever wants to nor should have to go through.
But many do, every...single...day.
You just happen to be one of them.
It is plainly evident this poem comes straight from your heart.
I say grieve 'til your hearts content if you want to. You've earned the right.
Just keep in mind that Mickey would like for you to be happy.
I'm quite sure of that.
~Dean
Comment Written 05-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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I don't believe it's true either, my friend Dean. But I know, every single day many parents lose their children. It's like being in a club that one was entered into involuntarily, and can't revoke the membership.
Thank you for your kind words of review, I do know that Mick wants me to be happy. He has THE GREAT ANSWER now.
All my best,
jeni
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You bet...
Comment from Pantygynt
This is a totally heart-wrenching piece of free verse that no one really has the right to criticize in any way.
You say in your notes that writing this has been a cathartic experience for you. I sincerely hope it has and that now you find yourself able to move on. I don't mean forget, that you will never do and indeed, that you should never do but you must move on, especially as there is anorther who needs your help, your strength behind her.
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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This is a totally heart-wrenching piece of free verse that no one really has the right to criticize in any way.
You say in your notes that writing this has been a cathartic experience for you. I sincerely hope it has and that now you find yourself able to move on. I don't mean forget, that you will never do and indeed, that you should never do but you must move on, especially as there is anorther who needs your help, your strength behind her.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Dear Jim,
Thank you for the lovely six-stars. I appreciate and am honored. Yes, I believe it has been cathartic. I'll never forget. And you very astutely point out that there is another who needs my help, support and strength. I must be strong and give it to her.
Comment from Poetic Friend
Oh Luna, my dear friend, this poem pulls strongly at my heartstrings. I have never loss a child so I can't say I truly relate to your pain.
You may never know what his last call meant, but he may wanted to tell you that he loves you, and thank you for being his mother.
I know it may be difficult, but try to focus on his good memories and love that you two mutually shared.
Thank God you have your beautiful writing as therapy. There is a book that I want to suggest you read. My friend gave to me after my brother died. I gave it to my mother. I have to get the title from my mother.
Meanwhile, I am here if you need me.
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Oh Luna, my dear friend, this poem pulls strongly at my heartstrings. I have never loss a child so I can't say I truly relate to your pain.
You may never know what his last call meant, but he may wanted to tell you that he loves you, and thank you for being his mother.
I know it may be difficult, but try to focus on his good memories and love that you two mutually shared.
Thank God you have your beautiful writing as therapy. There is a book that I want to suggest you read. My friend gave to me after my brother died. I gave it to my mother. I have to get the title from my mother.
Meanwhile, I am here if you need me.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Dear Poetic Friend,
I truly thank you for the lovely six-star review and it is appreciated. I am honored by it. I appreciate your supportive words of review, and look forward to hearing of the book.
love,
jeni
Comment from Sis Cat
Powerful, cathartic writing written from the heart of a grieving mother who channels her loss of her son into writing. There are so many things that stand out about your poem. One, the intimacy and the wondering about your son's last day: being turned away at Grandma's house, calling but not speaking to you. You wonder if he was aware he was dying. You wonder many things"
"Will my questions be answered?
Ever?"
Perhaps not. The best you can do is move forward with his memory:
"Today I'm able to write again,
sweet Mickey. I see you in
the butterflies, the beautiful
landscape, the clouds
and in the rainbows."
But you add to this rainbow picture a firm reality:
"Make no mistake: there will
always be a gaping, ragged
hole in my heart that won't
ever close."
You show a mother's pain of being unable to protect her child:
"That's the part of
this horror story that I
just can't accept."
Thank you for channeling your grief into this fine, free verse poem and ode about Mickey. I am sorry for your loss.
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Powerful, cathartic writing written from the heart of a grieving mother who channels her loss of her son into writing. There are so many things that stand out about your poem. One, the intimacy and the wondering about your son's last day: being turned away at Grandma's house, calling but not speaking to you. You wonder if he was aware he was dying. You wonder many things"
"Will my questions be answered?
Ever?"
Perhaps not. The best you can do is move forward with his memory:
"Today I'm able to write again,
sweet Mickey. I see you in
the butterflies, the beautiful
landscape, the clouds
and in the rainbows."
But you add to this rainbow picture a firm reality:
"Make no mistake: there will
always be a gaping, ragged
hole in my heart that won't
ever close."
You show a mother's pain of being unable to protect her child:
"That's the part of
this horror story that I
just can't accept."
Thank you for channeling your grief into this fine, free verse poem and ode about Mickey. I am sorry for your loss.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Dear Sis Cat,
Thank you for your very kind six-star review. I'm honored. For awhile I blamed my mother for his death, but it was not her fault, she did what she thought was the right thing to do. It was a mistake, plain and simple, that took his life. The hole in my heart physically hurts some days, and I do struggle with not having been able to protect him. But it is what it is. This life without him is my new normal. Thank you for your supportive review.
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
My dearest angel, vent and live, tell us your pain then move on knowing we care and he has heard. Know he is with you and is happier that you are now remembering him and sharing with others that they might not make the same mistake. Turned away, found a listening ear that said he understood (his dealer), and he preyed on his addiction and sadness.
On a personal note, it was a mistake, never should have happened, never planned, never meant to hurt. He loved you.
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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My dearest angel, vent and live, tell us your pain then move on knowing we care and he has heard. Know he is with you and is happier that you are now remembering him and sharing with others that they might not make the same mistake. Turned away, found a listening ear that said he understood (his dealer), and he preyed on his addiction and sadness.
On a personal note, it was a mistake, never should have happened, never planned, never meant to hurt. He loved you.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Barb, I thank you so very much for your kind six-star review. I love you for that. Yes, I will vent and cry and lean on you; but then I must move on. I think that's what I'm doing now.
Yes, I truly believe it was a mistake. The last thing in the world he would have wanted to do would have been to hurt me. We were so close, he was my protector, my knight in shining armour.
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All is good
Comment from Zue65
Drug abuse is killing healthy young Americans in your country. It is time the citizens have to take arms to stop the flood of drugs in your country and help young adults to take control of their lies away from the evil tentacles of drugs. God bless.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Drug abuse is killing healthy young Americans in your country. It is time the citizens have to take arms to stop the flood of drugs in your country and help young adults to take control of their lies away from the evil tentacles of drugs. God bless.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Dear nassus1957
Thank you for the insightful review. I appreciate it. God bless you as well,
yours,
luna
Comment from robyn corum
Jeni.
...
Wow.
I wish I had the words to say what I'm feeling. I feel honored to be here when you release that burden. I have tears in my eyes and I hurt for you. I can't imagine what you've been holding inside for so long. I hope this eases the pain, and even some of the guilt you may have held - for no reason except that you are a mom. I'm sending hugs to you and saying a prayer. And saying a prayer for your daughter, too. Hoping that this helps to get it out.
Many hugs -
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Jeni.
...
Wow.
I wish I had the words to say what I'm feeling. I feel honored to be here when you release that burden. I have tears in my eyes and I hurt for you. I can't imagine what you've been holding inside for so long. I hope this eases the pain, and even some of the guilt you may have held - for no reason except that you are a mom. I'm sending hugs to you and saying a prayer. And saying a prayer for your daughter, too. Hoping that this helps to get it out.
Many hugs -
Comment Written 05-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Dear Robyn,
Now you've got me in tears! I appreciate so much this six-star review, and I'm glad that this write shows how I felt and what I go through on a daily basis. I've received your hugs and the prayer for both me and Mick, and Colleen, and am just in awe to see this side of you. Thank you for caring.
Again, thank you for the six-star review - I'm truly honored!
love,
jeni
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
This moved me to tears. A heard-rending and incredibly emotional and tragic write, but it is wonderful written, your loss portrayed so effectively, well done and Mickey and you are together once more. We miss you Jen xxxx
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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This moved me to tears. A heard-rending and incredibly emotional and tragic write, but it is wonderful written, your loss portrayed so effectively, well done and Mickey and you are together once more. We miss you Jen xxxx
Comment Written 05-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Oh, Meia, you're making me cry right now. I just wrote this poem so the feelings are still kind of raw. I'm so grateful for the six-stars, my dear friend, and I'm glad that you think I hit the mark with the writing and portraying my loss.
Thank you once again, dear friend.
love,
jeni
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I could see how raw the poem is and the courage it took for you to write it. Such a brave and wonderful tribute to Mickey, the questions all Mothers ask themselves is what could you have done differently, the answer is nothing, drugs rob us of the ones we love, but Mickey loved you and will be watching over you until you are reunited again. I know that will happen for you Jeni. All my love Meia xx
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Wow....
I know how painful this must have been to write. I knew you son had died from an overdose, but didn't know how close he was to being home, nor about the phone calls. I'm sorry it happened to you both.
I have a 29 year old son who has similar problems, and I fear what all parents fear. What can I say? You know.
And I'm not the only one who goes through the worry. Your sharing your pain helps you, but it helps others as well.
Thank you for sharing your heart.
Rhonda
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Wow....
I know how painful this must have been to write. I knew you son had died from an overdose, but didn't know how close he was to being home, nor about the phone calls. I'm sorry it happened to you both.
I have a 29 year old son who has similar problems, and I fear what all parents fear. What can I say? You know.
And I'm not the only one who goes through the worry. Your sharing your pain helps you, but it helps others as well.
Thank you for sharing your heart.
Rhonda
Comment Written 05-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
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Dear Rhonda, thank you so much for this six-star review. I'm sorry to hear about your son, but not surprised. It is happening everywhere. I'll pray for you and him. I'm happy that you think my sharing my pain helps others; I want to try to make sense of Mickey's death.
Thank you again for your lovely review. I'm grateful and honored.
love,
jeni
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I don't know if there is a way to make sense of a tragedy such as this. The point is, you loved him unconditionally, and that he called you in his hour of need.
Thank you for your prayers!