Hues of Life
Viewing comments for Prologue "Senryu(venom took his life)"Senryu Collection
75 total reviews
Comment from bhogg
Well written Senryu, a bit dark. It is interesting how these small pieces necessitate a bit of thought. I like these written without art-work. Bill
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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Well written Senryu, a bit dark. It is interesting how these small pieces necessitate a bit of thought. I like these written without art-work. Bill
Comment Written 09-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:)
Comment from Isabella Thorne
This is an appropriate senyru and follows the pattern set for this type of poetry. Nice Job. I know you left the imagery off intentional, can I ask you why?
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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This is an appropriate senyru and follows the pattern set for this type of poetry. Nice Job. I know you left the imagery off intentional, can I ask you why?
Comment Written 09-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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Senryu have multiple layers,depending on how one interprets the words.Using a pic would limit that.I wanted readers to have their own images in mind.Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:)
Comment from mauial
There is clear irony in the contrast between the first and last line. Though gruesome to think this could be so, it is a good senryu.
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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There is clear irony in the contrast between the first and last line. Though gruesome to think this could be so, it is a good senryu.
Comment Written 09-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:)
Comment from amahra
I never heard of 5-7-4 senryu before. I must try one sometimes. Loved the poem, though. Wish you could have found a nice art work to go with it.
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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I never heard of 5-7-4 senryu before. I must try one sometimes. Loved the poem, though. Wish you could have found a nice art work to go with it.
Comment Written 09-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:)
Comment from barleygirl
Each line of this poem expresses an intensely-expressed thought/feeling, but each line seems like a separate thought/feeling -- not flowing as one complete concept from beginning to end of the poem. The reader is left to decide how these somewhat disconnected ideas fit together. There are several possibilities. This may be the intention, however. So I'll read this as a well-written poem! *smile*
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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Each line of this poem expresses an intensely-expressed thought/feeling, but each line seems like a separate thought/feeling -- not flowing as one complete concept from beginning to end of the poem. The reader is left to decide how these somewhat disconnected ideas fit together. There are several possibilities. This may be the intention, however. So I'll read this as a well-written poem! *smile*
Comment Written 09-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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Hi:)
Yes,you are right.Senryu have multiple layers,depending on how one interprets the words.Using a pic would limit that.I wanted readers to have their own images in mind.I appreciate your support.Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:)
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Actually soon after the male fertilizes the eggs and dies. So he lets the female eat him to give her the energy to lay an egg sack before she dies herself. Great Senryu
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2013
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Actually soon after the male fertilizes the eggs and dies. So he lets the female eat him to give her the energy to lay an egg sack before she dies herself. Great Senryu
Comment Written 09-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2013
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A very different interpretation.In senryu,he and she refer to a human couple and that is what I intend here.It is a bit dark senryu.Thanks for your comments and review.
Comment from Alan K Pease
The venom of life is what we may think and say about each other. A black widow may be a source of this venom but its' transmission leads to loneliness and despair over what and who we are. Good senryu>
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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The venom of life is what we may think and say about each other. A black widow may be a source of this venom but its' transmission leads to loneliness and despair over what and who we are. Good senryu>
Comment Written 09-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:)
Comment from Cedar
This is a very interesting piece. However, isn't "senryu" supposed to be about human nature/emotions? I'm certainly not an expert, but wouldn't this be classified more as a
"haiku".
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2013
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This is a very interesting piece. However, isn't "senryu" supposed to be about human nature/emotions? I'm certainly not an expert, but wouldn't this be classified more as a
"haiku".
Comment Written 09-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2013
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I stated it in the notes.It is about human act and social comment too.'she' refers to wife.Moreover,haiku doesn't allow personification.Thank you
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Thanks my friend for the explanation. Have a nice day. Bill
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You too have a nice day!
Comment from Norbanus
A powered search
for Senryu perfection
jealous poets weep
I've often bled for things I've said
and this is no exception
A blatant ham, that's what I am
engaging in deception
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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A powered search
for Senryu perfection
jealous poets weep
I've often bled for things I've said
and this is no exception
A blatant ham, that's what I am
engaging in deception
Comment Written 09-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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Haha,very witty review!I am pleased you liked it.Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:)
Comment from Righteous Riter
This piece is not more than 17 syllables so it qualifies for the Senryu Poem. The writer does a good job of painting a picture in the mind of the reader so therefore a photo is not needed. Good work.
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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This piece is not more than 17 syllables so it qualifies for the Senryu Poem. The writer does a good job of painting a picture in the mind of the reader so therefore a photo is not needed. Good work.
Comment Written 09-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2013
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Thanks for your kind words and excellent review:)