Another Pretty Face
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Chapter 4 part two"Can love survive small town gossip?
78 total reviews
Comment from jadapenn
Hello, glad to see you up and writing. More than what I'm doing. I've lost interest.
This was a lovely chapter. I just love how Joe is charming her. Sara's internal dialogue keeps us right up to date with everything she's feeling.
Well done. luv jada
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Hello, glad to see you up and writing. More than what I'm doing. I've lost interest.
This was a lovely chapter. I just love how Joe is charming her. Sara's internal dialogue keeps us right up to date with everything she's feeling.
Well done. luv jada
Comment Written 04-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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My heart is willing, but my body is not. Thank you for dropping by, girlfriend. I appreciate hearing from you.
Comment from BPL76
I have read other chapters and
i think the detail is still good
Your dialog is believable
The flow is good
I liked this chapter and
look forward to reading more
BPL
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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I have read other chapters and
i think the detail is still good
Your dialog is believable
The flow is good
I liked this chapter and
look forward to reading more
BPL
Comment Written 04-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi barbara,
Joe is certainly a gentleman, a sharp contrast to the scumbag that ruined Sara's reputation. This is a good chapter and evidently leading into some 'setback' for Sara once Joe leaves.
Interesting blend of the dialogue and the thoughts running through her mind at the same time.
Patrick
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Hi barbara,
Joe is certainly a gentleman, a sharp contrast to the scumbag that ruined Sara's reputation. This is a good chapter and evidently leading into some 'setback' for Sara once Joe leaves.
Interesting blend of the dialogue and the thoughts running through her mind at the same time.
Patrick
Comment Written 04-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your kind review and continued support.
Comment from dmjones
I like that Joe shouted what he was doing to the entire town or anyone who would listen. I should have mentioned that in the last chapter. I really like both the characters. Good job and Sara's emotions here. They do come through. I look forward to the next chapter.
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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I like that Joe shouted what he was doing to the entire town or anyone who would listen. I should have mentioned that in the last chapter. I really like both the characters. Good job and Sara's emotions here. They do come through. I look forward to the next chapter.
Comment Written 04-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your kind review and continued support.
Comment from bhogg
Barbara - you are such a romantic! Joe took Sara parking! He's also a forward thinker. I've never made out in a Porsche, but I've got to believe a blanket's better. You've done your usual outstanding job of balancing dialog and narrative and your editing appears flawless. I was sure glad to see your post - hope that means you're regaining your strength. LOL Bill
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Barbara - you are such a romantic! Joe took Sara parking! He's also a forward thinker. I've never made out in a Porsche, but I've got to believe a blanket's better. You've done your usual outstanding job of balancing dialog and narrative and your editing appears flawless. I was sure glad to see your post - hope that means you're regaining your strength. LOL Bill
Comment Written 04-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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I am doing better. Thank you for asking, Bill. I am failing at not doing to much. I have landing myself back in bed a few times already. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Monte Carbolic
Another solid chapter, but I am not surprised. Your writing has been consistent in its style for as long as I've been reading it. Very impressive book.
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Another solid chapter, but I am not surprised. Your writing has been consistent in its style for as long as I've been reading it. Very impressive book.
Comment Written 04-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from hyway94
A wonderful chapter. The flow makes it feel as if we're sitting along side of them. As always I could not find any errors. I'm sure glad that you're feeling better. Watch those limitations, we don't want you getting worse. My prayers are with you as so many have already told you/
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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A wonderful chapter. The flow makes it feel as if we're sitting along side of them. As always I could not find any errors. I'm sure glad that you're feeling better. Watch those limitations, we don't want you getting worse. My prayers are with you as so many have already told you/
Comment Written 04-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your prayers. I am still struggling with doing too much. I have to learn to pass my self, but school for the teachers start in 9 days and I have so much to do. I plan on starting the school year, we will see if the radiation treatment has different ideas. Thank you for the kind review.
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Just be careful.
Comment from zoocq
I love this story so much! Maybe I should't read more...wait for the book to come out...lol! I can't stay away and constantly scan the front page of Fanstory looking for you! Please take it slow and heal...
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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I love this story so much! Maybe I should't read more...wait for the book to come out...lol! I can't stay away and constantly scan the front page of Fanstory looking for you! Please take it slow and heal...
Comment Written 04-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from missy98writer
Barbara,
I just signed on to cringe at 20PM's and when I saw your name I had to read. Your latest chapter of 'Another Pretty Face' is very well written and a complete to read. The romance is heating up between Joe and Sara. Here are some paragraphs that stood out:
When the kiss ended, Sara's eyes remained closed and she placed her right hand across her stomach. I hope Joe never discovers how that kiss affected me.
"At least it's the middle of the night. Most townspeople are asleep." Sara released a deep breath. I can't believe he did that.
Sara watched the rows of streetlights, until Joe turned left away from the town lights. I wonder what he has planned. He's been a perfect gentlemen. Will that change?
She glanced toward the boat. "It's late for river activity. I guess they're running behind." After smoothing out a wrinkle in the blanket, Sara added, "This is a major make-out place. You said you were well behaved in high school.
"I know, but I thought it might help you understand my motives." He took his billfold from his back pocket and opened it to a photograph. "I'm sure you recognize my parents." After passing those photos, he stopped. "This is Matt." He pointed to each picture as he spoke. "His wife, Dani. Drew, their three year old and Emily, their infant daughter.
"The stars are beautiful." She stared up at the night sky. "They look so close I could almost reach up and touch them." A loud sigh, escaped her lips. "I'm not sure being a victim is any better than being a slut." She glanced at him. "I guess it doesn't make any difference. The outcome's the same." I screwed up my entire life.
She leaned her head on his shoulder. "True, and you're a very wonderful man." I feel so comfortable with you, but I'd better be careful. I've already proven I don't make good decisions where men are concerned. I can't afford another mistake.
"Come here." He pulled her closer to him and kissed her. "I'm not goinog to break you heart. I told you I'm planning on seeing you until you give me walking papers.
You have an error in the last line goinog is going. Your story is fabulous. I hope your doing fine, my friend. I'm baffled by Joe because he seems too good to be true. . .Melissa!
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Barbara,
I just signed on to cringe at 20PM's and when I saw your name I had to read. Your latest chapter of 'Another Pretty Face' is very well written and a complete to read. The romance is heating up between Joe and Sara. Here are some paragraphs that stood out:
When the kiss ended, Sara's eyes remained closed and she placed her right hand across her stomach. I hope Joe never discovers how that kiss affected me.
"At least it's the middle of the night. Most townspeople are asleep." Sara released a deep breath. I can't believe he did that.
Sara watched the rows of streetlights, until Joe turned left away from the town lights. I wonder what he has planned. He's been a perfect gentlemen. Will that change?
She glanced toward the boat. "It's late for river activity. I guess they're running behind." After smoothing out a wrinkle in the blanket, Sara added, "This is a major make-out place. You said you were well behaved in high school.
"I know, but I thought it might help you understand my motives." He took his billfold from his back pocket and opened it to a photograph. "I'm sure you recognize my parents." After passing those photos, he stopped. "This is Matt." He pointed to each picture as he spoke. "His wife, Dani. Drew, their three year old and Emily, their infant daughter.
"The stars are beautiful." She stared up at the night sky. "They look so close I could almost reach up and touch them." A loud sigh, escaped her lips. "I'm not sure being a victim is any better than being a slut." She glanced at him. "I guess it doesn't make any difference. The outcome's the same." I screwed up my entire life.
She leaned her head on his shoulder. "True, and you're a very wonderful man." I feel so comfortable with you, but I'd better be careful. I've already proven I don't make good decisions where men are concerned. I can't afford another mistake.
"Come here." He pulled her closer to him and kissed her. "I'm not goinog to break you heart. I told you I'm planning on seeing you until you give me walking papers.
You have an error in the last line goinog is going. Your story is fabulous. I hope your doing fine, my friend. I'm baffled by Joe because he seems too good to be true. . .Melissa!
Comment Written 04-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Thank you Missy, for catching that error. I changed it at the last minute, then missed the extra 'o'. It's always a pleasure hearing from you.
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I'm loving your book. Please post more.
Melissa.
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I will be editing the next post this afternoon.
Comment from patwannabe
Wonderful chapter, Barbara. I checked your reviews and nearly all of them have commented on your two typos. It's time to fix them :-) So I won't point them out again. I'm so glad Joe is a real gentleman. I get so tired of the pre marital bed hopping. I didn't even need to hold my breath, ready to click out of your story. I'm glad. pat
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Wonderful chapter, Barbara. I checked your reviews and nearly all of them have commented on your two typos. It's time to fix them :-) So I won't point them out again. I'm so glad Joe is a real gentleman. I get so tired of the pre marital bed hopping. I didn't even need to hold my breath, ready to click out of your story. I'm glad. pat
Comment Written 04-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2010
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Thank you. The typos came in after I went to bed, but are taken care of now. No one caught them before I went to bed. Thank you for your kind review.