Nightqueen
She is so beautiful it hurts.She is the Night Queen, Lilith.45 total reviews
Comment from Wabigoon
Meia--
Don't you always find her? I saw no man here, I saw you being tempted. Trouble is, in my estimation, the Xtians have the lock of the definition of that temptation so it is snake-like, demonic, "evil." In fact, in my estimation, the "temptation" is "be like us," which means, in my parlance, a being capable of true creation, a being with all of the powers of "God," but understanding those powers were -- are our original being. The deceit is on the part of those wishing us to believe we have fallen into an essentially powerless state. Not true. An inception was performed and all our original powers were stolen to become God. "Lilith," as you represent her here and she is mightily seductive, is the fall from those powers, not the recovery of them. She's kin to Pandora, or, perhaps, the version we are given of her, the one you present here, is God's, hey, Adam, look at this babe! In fact, she is a very normal woman who says, Hey, Adam, I can see into my womb to prevent God from cursing my children. In my world we control the "Garden," God is not a third party to the womb where he can weave his story. Hey, Adam, with me we possess the power of true creation, all the power the Father supposedly possesses. If you come with with we can recover the Garden for human being. If we allow "God" to drive us from the Garden we are doomed. Lilith and Eve are the same person. Lilith, Eve before her fall into the "modern woman," modern human being, cursed, outside the Garden, unable to control matter in her own womb or the womb of True Creation.
I think you demonstrate extraordinary powers of color and taste here, imagery, etc. This is really well done:
Greengage, and Gimlet coloured.
You are straight from an Aubrey Beardsley painting.
All snakelike curls and sinuous curves.
Your pussycat smile,
Betraying only a mere hint of a darting forked tongue.
Lips bee-stung, and the colour of shattered garnet,
And coils of midnight tinged with violet,
Are set off by the grey twilight behind you,
Lighting up like a crown upon your beautiful head.
As if you knew this is where I would find you.
Somehow I always find you.
Yes, we will always find her because she is what has been...stolen! Redeem her from the myth of the aliens, the Independence Day creeps sitting in the Mothership Churches writing these versions of our past so we believe them, can never reach the surface.
I have no sixes. This deserves one for color, imagery, not, however, for meaning, bravery.
Best
Wabigoon/Jeff
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2017
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Meia--
Don't you always find her? I saw no man here, I saw you being tempted. Trouble is, in my estimation, the Xtians have the lock of the definition of that temptation so it is snake-like, demonic, "evil." In fact, in my estimation, the "temptation" is "be like us," which means, in my parlance, a being capable of true creation, a being with all of the powers of "God," but understanding those powers were -- are our original being. The deceit is on the part of those wishing us to believe we have fallen into an essentially powerless state. Not true. An inception was performed and all our original powers were stolen to become God. "Lilith," as you represent her here and she is mightily seductive, is the fall from those powers, not the recovery of them. She's kin to Pandora, or, perhaps, the version we are given of her, the one you present here, is God's, hey, Adam, look at this babe! In fact, she is a very normal woman who says, Hey, Adam, I can see into my womb to prevent God from cursing my children. In my world we control the "Garden," God is not a third party to the womb where he can weave his story. Hey, Adam, with me we possess the power of true creation, all the power the Father supposedly possesses. If you come with with we can recover the Garden for human being. If we allow "God" to drive us from the Garden we are doomed. Lilith and Eve are the same person. Lilith, Eve before her fall into the "modern woman," modern human being, cursed, outside the Garden, unable to control matter in her own womb or the womb of True Creation.
I think you demonstrate extraordinary powers of color and taste here, imagery, etc. This is really well done:
Greengage, and Gimlet coloured.
You are straight from an Aubrey Beardsley painting.
All snakelike curls and sinuous curves.
Your pussycat smile,
Betraying only a mere hint of a darting forked tongue.
Lips bee-stung, and the colour of shattered garnet,
And coils of midnight tinged with violet,
Are set off by the grey twilight behind you,
Lighting up like a crown upon your beautiful head.
As if you knew this is where I would find you.
Somehow I always find you.
Yes, we will always find her because she is what has been...stolen! Redeem her from the myth of the aliens, the Independence Day creeps sitting in the Mothership Churches writing these versions of our past so we believe them, can never reach the surface.
I have no sixes. This deserves one for color, imagery, not, however, for meaning, bravery.
Best
Wabigoon/Jeff
Comment Written 06-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2017
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Ahhh I was tempted also by a Lilith once.....even women can be victims. In the Renaissance, Michelangelo portrayed Lilith as a half-woman, half-serpent, coiled around the Tree of Knowledge. I almost called this poem 'Serpentina' for that reason. Later, her beauty would captivate the English poet Dante Gabriel Rossetti. ?Her enchanted hair,? he wrote, ?was the first gold.?(I see her as Beardsley painted her, an enchanting raven haired emerald eyed enchantress. Irish novelist James Joyce cast her as the ?patron of abortions.? Modern feminists celebrate her bold struggle for independence from Adam. Thankyou so much for your very thorough review I really appreciate you taking the time to tell me what you enjoyed and sharing your thoughts :)meia
Comment from Javed05
I like this poem . I found it is engaging for the reader and it flows smoothly. language used is great and creates good imagery.thanks for sharing with us
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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I like this poem . I found it is engaging for the reader and it flows smoothly. language used is great and creates good imagery.thanks for sharing with us
Comment Written 06-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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Thankyou so much for your very kind review many thanks :)
Comment from Irish Rain
Well, she certainly doesn't seem very nice, ha ha. But, not her place or goal to be, right? Sort of like a mermaid with her siren song, never mind that the gullible sailors drown, she's gotten what she wants. Very good poem Miss Meia, blessings...
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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Well, she certainly doesn't seem very nice, ha ha. But, not her place or goal to be, right? Sort of like a mermaid with her siren song, never mind that the gullible sailors drown, she's gotten what she wants. Very good poem Miss Meia, blessings...
Comment Written 06-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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Thankyou so much for your very kind review, kind regards Meia :)
Comment from nancyrabbrose
A very dramatic poem, well written, full of imagery and eroticism. I like the flow and the way some lines were long, some short, some medium sized. That seems to give a pulse to the scene and descriptions. Well done.
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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A very dramatic poem, well written, full of imagery and eroticism. I like the flow and the way some lines were long, some short, some medium sized. That seems to give a pulse to the scene and descriptions. Well done.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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thankyou so much for your kind and helpful review warmest regards, Meia :)
Comment from Nika2016
I loved your descriptive words..coils of midnight tinged with violet....scents of ambergris and your notes about it.....I need to read more about Lilith....I am unfamiliar with her biography except for snippets...
Very nice writing describing obsession...
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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I loved your descriptive words..coils of midnight tinged with violet....scents of ambergris and your notes about it.....I need to read more about Lilith....I am unfamiliar with her biography except for snippets...
Very nice writing describing obsession...
Comment Written 06-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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Thank-you so much fro your very generous and kind review. Here is more information about Lilith although her roots are vast and there is so much to know about her: http://www.shoutingfromtherooftop.com/lilith-introduction.html
kindest regards, Meia :)
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Thank you...love your poetry..unique voice
Comment from estory
I think this is wonderful poetry. I really enjoyed the rythems here, the boldly done, vibrant images. The image of the empty conch shell at the end was especially relevant and descriptive. you really get a sense of an empty experience that is still somehow beautiful. The green eyes, the ambergris, the forked tongue all give a sense of fatal attraction. I see you like Keats and Heaney; I did my college thesis on Heaney and Yeats. Love his work, especially Door into the Dark and Death of a Naturalist. estory
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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I think this is wonderful poetry. I really enjoyed the rythems here, the boldly done, vibrant images. The image of the empty conch shell at the end was especially relevant and descriptive. you really get a sense of an empty experience that is still somehow beautiful. The green eyes, the ambergris, the forked tongue all give a sense of fatal attraction. I see you like Keats and Heaney; I did my college thesis on Heaney and Yeats. Love his work, especially Door into the Dark and Death of a Naturalist. estory
Comment Written 06-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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Thankyou so much! I am glad you saw the connection between the themes, I am also a big fan of Yeats, who as I understand was strongly influenced by Keats.Thanks so much for your kind review, Meia :)
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Wow. Your author notes are longer than your poem. Your poem has great use of your extensive vocabulary. You use words that many people are conmfortable using. I enjoy a post that doesn't dumb down.
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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Wow. Your author notes are longer than your poem. Your poem has great use of your extensive vocabulary. You use words that many people are conmfortable using. I enjoy a post that doesn't dumb down.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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Thankyou so very much for your kind words, Thomas :) very much appreciated ! meia :)
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hi Meia - this is a very descriptive and well written piece of work. Good use of colour throughout. Good mention of Aubrey Beardsley whose work is appropriate for your poem. There is strong eroticism and you should have entered it in that contest. Very good author notes to help the reader. Well done. Warm regards Dorothy
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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Hi Meia - this is a very descriptive and well written piece of work. Good use of colour throughout. Good mention of Aubrey Beardsley whose work is appropriate for your poem. There is strong eroticism and you should have entered it in that contest. Very good author notes to help the reader. Well done. Warm regards Dorothy
Comment Written 06-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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Thankyou so much Dorothy. Your review is very helpful and kind. I did not actually see the poem as erotic but as wicked and bestial. But many have commented on that aspect. Thankyou so much for your kind suggestion, kindest regards, Meia :)
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem about the Nightqueen. That we rather wish to never meet this queen. She is very demanding and persistent.
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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A very well-written poem about the Nightqueen. That we rather wish to never meet this queen. She is very demanding and persistent.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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She is Lillith, the Queen of Harlots and abominations, former wife of Adam and she is beautiful, bewitching and bestial.Wish I could have included a Beardsley painting to emphasise the slanted eyes, the coiled hair, the opulent beauty...Serpentina is another title I played with but decided against.Many thanks for your comments you are very kind.meia:)
Comment from Pantygynt
This is heady stuff, like the ambergris it mentions. The words mirror the qualities of the female described and the final prayer to Lilith, Queen of Hell is quite sensually erotic without being in the least bit offensive. An extremely powerful piece of free verse that makes use of consonance and cross rhyme, alliteration and approximate rhyme from time to time.
In the final part, good use is made of repetition and a little full rhyme. An excellent piece.
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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This is heady stuff, like the ambergris it mentions. The words mirror the qualities of the female described and the final prayer to Lilith, Queen of Hell is quite sensually erotic without being in the least bit offensive. An extremely powerful piece of free verse that makes use of consonance and cross rhyme, alliteration and approximate rhyme from time to time.
In the final part, good use is made of repetition and a little full rhyme. An excellent piece.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2017
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wow, I am quite honoured with you excellent review! I really appreciate the specific of your review as most people are just general. A thorough review and I am absolutely delighted that you enjoyed the poem.regards, meia :)
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From the little I have seen of your writing I have formed the opinion that you know what you are about when it comes to poetry and there is a huge majority who unfortunately don't, so they can't be expected to write a decent review.
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Thank-you very much. I do take time to remember to comment on such things as alliteration,rhyming schemes and such-like, when at all possible, I try to give a decent review rather than just 'great work now I will just fill up as much of this review as I can with pointless text happy holidays and all the very best to you and your family regards steve'...lol....You know the type of review I mean! Your review was just as I would hope for from a professional such as yourself. It's a pity there are few who writes reviews who actually take time to try and understand the poems form and meaning.Thank-you again.Meia :)