Beneath a Crescent Moon
a minute poem41 total reviews
Comment from womanwriter
Dear ALVINTETHINGTON;
I got the feeling you should have been howling or braying beneath that crescent moon! LOL
A little dark for my taste, but well done none the less!
Sincerely,
womanwriter
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2008
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Dear ALVINTETHINGTON;
I got the feeling you should have been howling or braying beneath that crescent moon! LOL
A little dark for my taste, but well done none the less!
Sincerely,
womanwriter
Comment Written 26-Jun-2008
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2008
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Thank you for your, ahem, kind (SMILE) comments. You understood what I was doing with that poem.
Comment from Shiri Marie
I love this poem. It reminds me of a friend of mine who has a lot of mental problems and he is really religious, that was how he talked ever day. Every word that came out of his mouth was a poem i wish i wrote some of it down. Good work.
Love it ....
"I cry beneath a crescent moon;
It's coming soon--
Impending doom;
On me it looms. "
reply by the author on 24-May-2008
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I love this poem. It reminds me of a friend of mine who has a lot of mental problems and he is really religious, that was how he talked ever day. Every word that came out of his mouth was a poem i wish i wrote some of it down. Good work.
Love it ....
"I cry beneath a crescent moon;
It's coming soon--
Impending doom;
On me it looms. "
Comment Written 24-May-2008
reply by the author on 24-May-2008
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Yes, this is how I feel when one of my episodes of mental illness is coming on. Luckily now I recognize the danger signals. I hope your friend reaches that place soon. Thanks for a good review.
Comment from samandlancelot
I like your picture of a crescent moon over the big city lights. Impending doom makes me think of the end of the world that I believe is close at hand. The demons are trying to break you before you reach the end of your race. The end of the world is weighing on you to the brink of insanity.
Correct me if I'm wrong.
There is always so much to glean from your poems.
Patricia
reply by the author on 20-May-2008
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I like your picture of a crescent moon over the big city lights. Impending doom makes me think of the end of the world that I believe is close at hand. The demons are trying to break you before you reach the end of your race. The end of the world is weighing on you to the brink of insanity.
Correct me if I'm wrong.
There is always so much to glean from your poems.
Patricia
Comment Written 20-May-2008
reply by the author on 20-May-2008
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I didn't see this as an apocalyptic poem, but thank you for showing me another interpretation and making me think. I truly appreciate it and the excellent review.
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
Absolutely awesome write! Love its depth and despair that cries out in this piece....Great job on this poem....good luck in the contest. Love, Susanne
reply by the author on 20-May-2008
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Absolutely awesome write! Love its depth and despair that cries out in this piece....Great job on this poem....good luck in the contest. Love, Susanne
Comment Written 20-May-2008
reply by the author on 20-May-2008
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Yes, you "caught" exactly the emotion I wanted to convey. Thank you for a superb review.
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You are a complicated, yet easy to understand writer!!!!!
Comment from Judian James
Tempted by the city lights and nights, are we? This is good Alvin. I would have preferred to see the bb rhyme less close to the aa, than the words you chose, however I especially liked your third quatrain.
reply by the author on 20-May-2008
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Tempted by the city lights and nights, are we? This is good Alvin. I would have preferred to see the bb rhyme less close to the aa, than the words you chose, however I especially liked your third quatrain.
Comment Written 20-May-2008
reply by the author on 20-May-2008
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Yes, I thought about making this a monotetra or another form that had an aaaa rhyme scheme, but I felt that would add a lilting tone that would lessen the seriousness of the poem. I am glad you liked the third quatrain; it was the hardest to write. Thanks also for a good review.
Comment from Scarlettdreams
I can only imagine feeling like this. You capture it well here in this tight little form so that we can all have a peek into a little bit of hell. Bravo
reply by the author on 19-May-2008
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I can only imagine feeling like this. You capture it well here in this tight little form so that we can all have a peek into a little bit of hell. Bravo
Comment Written 19-May-2008
reply by the author on 19-May-2008
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Yes, that's exactly what I wanted to convey. Thank you for understanding so well.
Comment from babylonia
you are teaching me so much about poetry. i really appreciate it. every time you give a description of how the poem is read i write it down. then i too, LOL can attempt to make one. thank you
now for the poem. i really enjoyed this one. easy to read and follow. no spaggies do i see. all syllable counts are accounted for. imagery is excellent. i always like seeing a picture of the night in the big city.
definitely keep up the good work~
good luck~
reply by the author on 19-May-2008
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you are teaching me so much about poetry. i really appreciate it. every time you give a description of how the poem is read i write it down. then i too, LOL can attempt to make one. thank you
now for the poem. i really enjoyed this one. easy to read and follow. no spaggies do i see. all syllable counts are accounted for. imagery is excellent. i always like seeing a picture of the night in the big city.
definitely keep up the good work~
good luck~
Comment Written 19-May-2008
reply by the author on 19-May-2008
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Thank you for such a kind and understanding review. I truly appreciate it.
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you are welcome~
barbara
Comment from Jonez08
Alvin this is the first time I'm reviewing your work and you are certainly blessed with a gift. This is not only written professionally, but the imagery and words you've chose, brings it to life. The opening line catches the reader right away. Thanks for sharing and I wish you well in the contest.
Cassandra
reply by the author on 19-May-2008
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Alvin this is the first time I'm reviewing your work and you are certainly blessed with a gift. This is not only written professionally, but the imagery and words you've chose, brings it to life. The opening line catches the reader right away. Thanks for sharing and I wish you well in the contest.
Cassandra
Comment Written 19-May-2008
reply by the author on 19-May-2008
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You are very kind. I believe I have reviewed some of your work, have I not? I hope we continue to review each other. I greatly appreciate this review.
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Yes you have. You recently reviewed Mirror of Deception. Twin brothers, Matthew is on his way to town. You may not remember, but I'm sure we'll cross paths again. Take care
Cassandra
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Ah yes, I remember now. You stress the importance of African American culture in your characters. I enjoyed your writing.
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lol, I guess that's one way to be remembered. I'm glad you enjoyed. I look forward to reviewing more of your work in the near future.
Cassandra
Comment from PoesyPoet
You know, Alvin, you should teach writing styles and formats! I'd come all the way to Cali to attend your class!
Good work! I bet, most here, don't realize the work that went into this one. Meter and rhyme are flawless! If you don't win, I won't vote in another contest!
Celeste
reply by the author on 19-May-2008
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You know, Alvin, you should teach writing styles and formats! I'd come all the way to Cali to attend your class!
Good work! I bet, most here, don't realize the work that went into this one. Meter and rhyme are flawless! If you don't win, I won't vote in another contest!
Celeste
Comment Written 19-May-2008
reply by the author on 19-May-2008
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You are far too kind, I fear. Thank you for the excellent review; I truly appreciate it.
Comment from Swtdreamz
Doom?
That encroaching fear of eternal night.
But, with each fall, we can climb back up, because there is nothing lower.
Stuck to the ground by which mortal coils.
Wreak havoc on your mind.
And rip your soul to shreds.
reply by the author on 19-May-2008
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Doom?
That encroaching fear of eternal night.
But, with each fall, we can climb back up, because there is nothing lower.
Stuck to the ground by which mortal coils.
Wreak havoc on your mind.
And rip your soul to shreds.
Comment Written 19-May-2008
reply by the author on 19-May-2008
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Your review is almost as frightening as the poem! Thanks for a good review.