Why? I Ask
A husband asks why his wife left.22 total reviews
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
I saw the station wagon gone,
but thought, "Claire's shopping, took her coat,
the kids and dog. They'll soon be back."
But by the sink I found your note.
(I saw the station wagon gone,
but thought, "Claire's shopping, took her coat,
the kids and dog. They'll soon be back,"
but by the sink I found your note.)
This is well written rhyming poem except the above stanza needs to be repunctuated. Best wishes in the contest, my friend. There have been so many good entries~Debbie
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
I saw the station wagon gone,
but thought, "Claire's shopping, took her coat,
the kids and dog. They'll soon be back."
But by the sink I found your note.
(I saw the station wagon gone,
but thought, "Claire's shopping, took her coat,
the kids and dog. They'll soon be back,"
but by the sink I found your note.)
This is well written rhyming poem except the above stanza needs to be repunctuated. Best wishes in the contest, my friend. There have been so many good entries~Debbie
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
-
Thank you very much for sharing my poem, Debbie, and for your punctuation suggestion. Rod
Comment from Sallyo
She probably did say what was wrong, over and over, in different ways, and he just didn't listen. This is a said poem because the poor clueless man lost the kids and dog too... it certainly works with the prompt, and giving the wife a name brings an immediacy to the tale.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
She probably did say what was wrong, over and over, in different ways, and he just didn't listen. This is a said poem because the poor clueless man lost the kids and dog too... it certainly works with the prompt, and giving the wife a name brings an immediacy to the tale.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
-
Thank you, Sallyo, for sharing WHY? Yes, she probably did try tell him something was wrong, but he was too busy to listen. This is a true story about what happened to a close friend of mine. I?ve heard his side many times, but never hers. Rod