A Piece of the Pie
A Rogue Piece (PLEASE read author notes)31 total reviews
Comment from padumachitta
HI you big bruiser you. My weekly laugh, well, my wekkly smutty laugh.
You do this a little too well, :-)
What would we do without such a beast to go the extra verse
padumachitta
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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HI you big bruiser you. My weekly laugh, well, my wekkly smutty laugh.
You do this a little too well, :-)
What would we do without such a beast to go the extra verse
padumachitta
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thank you so much, my friend. I think I've decided that I like doing these, so those who don't like it can skip me on Fridays. Thanks for YOUR support!
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Hey, I'm with you. You know what we say in Canada, us cowgirls? **** 'em if they can't take a joke. Okay, it is RIBAlD...but it is all without malice...and hey I figure if a sweet little Buddhist like me can have a laugh.....it can't be all that terrible....well, ok, it is a lttile ummmm, off colour....
oh geez...any more feet I can get in my mouth?...no don't answer that....I can just guess where that would end...
:-)
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Oh, I could take that and run, pad. :) Nice setup.
Comment from Gloria ....
There you go, dear, David for such a lovely slice of cherry-rhymed pie on a cool March morning. Excellent form and love the consistent internal rhyme which I know (from TRYING to do it myself), is actually quite difficult. At least for me it is. I like the Hip-Hop rhythm.
Anyway keep riposting because it's a terrific way to clear the cobwebs out of a sluggish attic with morning romps in the hay.
Cheers,
Gloria
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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There you go, dear, David for such a lovely slice of cherry-rhymed pie on a cool March morning. Excellent form and love the consistent internal rhyme which I know (from TRYING to do it myself), is actually quite difficult. At least for me it is. I like the Hip-Hop rhythm.
Anyway keep riposting because it's a terrific way to clear the cobwebs out of a sluggish attic with morning romps in the hay.
Cheers,
Gloria
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Awww, thanks so much, my friend! I really appreciate that.
You know, I'd thought about stopping these, but now I realize that the people here I love the most all enjoy them, and I enjoy the ripostes...and it IS good for the muse to have these exercises between the sexes. ;-)
I appreciate you, Gloria!
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Absolutely correct Mr. Smart One. I think of these ripostes as warm up exercises for a day of writing with a clearer, more creative focus. I definitely appreciate you taking the initiative (and sometimes heat) for leading the class.:)
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I love the heat. I AM from the south, after all, and we're "raised" to assist. :)
Comment from Robin Gilmor
Pumping along dear David. Never a disappointing Fry .day. I am interested by the form of this write. I do so love your command of the internal rhyme. Have a great weekend. Smiles, Robin :)
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Pumping along dear David. Never a disappointing Fry .day. I am interested by the form of this write. I do so love your command of the internal rhyme. Have a great weekend. Smiles, Robin :)
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thank you so much, Robin. You're a great sport, and I appreciate you! David
Comment from rama devi
As usual, this is masterfully crafted, my friend. Clever, unique and entertaining--with a certain bawdy flavor the rogue loves so well. It's an amusing write, especially:
LOL!-
The words-- and legs-- are spreading; he's endowed to plow your land
By messing up your bedding, and the wedding you had planned.
Good alliteration on V:
Your mixed emotions greet him (he's a blessing and a curse),
But nothing shall defeat him (no vagina, verve, or verse).
Great internal rhymes and witty content:
You lie and try to shame him with your feministic pact,
And blame, rename and game him, but he gives you what you've lacked--
Clever, witty:
A Hyde providing service with an emphasis on 'serve'--
He's never reckless, nervous, or neglectful of a curve.
Clever punning and fine alliteration:
By tongue or tool or fingers, it's a guarantee you'll come
To find the tingle lingers in your tummy (or your bum).
Oh yeah! Rub it in, why don't you (no pun intended):
But, please continue ranting, and incanting like a witch--
When you're attached and panting, he's the cat to scratch your itch.
Flawless flow and meter. Superb rhyme and internal rhyme as well as smatterings of alliteration and other poetic devices. NO sixes left on weekends, sometimes.
:-)
Warmly (not hot!), rd
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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As usual, this is masterfully crafted, my friend. Clever, unique and entertaining--with a certain bawdy flavor the rogue loves so well. It's an amusing write, especially:
LOL!-
The words-- and legs-- are spreading; he's endowed to plow your land
By messing up your bedding, and the wedding you had planned.
Good alliteration on V:
Your mixed emotions greet him (he's a blessing and a curse),
But nothing shall defeat him (no vagina, verve, or verse).
Great internal rhymes and witty content:
You lie and try to shame him with your feministic pact,
And blame, rename and game him, but he gives you what you've lacked--
Clever, witty:
A Hyde providing service with an emphasis on 'serve'--
He's never reckless, nervous, or neglectful of a curve.
Clever punning and fine alliteration:
By tongue or tool or fingers, it's a guarantee you'll come
To find the tingle lingers in your tummy (or your bum).
Oh yeah! Rub it in, why don't you (no pun intended):
But, please continue ranting, and incanting like a witch--
When you're attached and panting, he's the cat to scratch your itch.
Flawless flow and meter. Superb rhyme and internal rhyme as well as smatterings of alliteration and other poetic devices. NO sixes left on weekends, sometimes.
:-)
Warmly (not hot!), rd
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thanks so much, my friend! I know these aren't your usual cupa, but I appreciate that you can appreciate the craft, anyway. Have a great weekend! David
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:-))
Comment from Carrie Carson
Wicked but suits me somehow. I've known a rogue or two..
I like the pace of this and the internal rhyme, too. Damn, I always pun, even when I'm not trying to.
The last line is too funny... :) Carrie
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Wicked but suits me somehow. I've known a rogue or two..
I like the pace of this and the internal rhyme, too. Damn, I always pun, even when I'm not trying to.
The last line is too funny... :) Carrie
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thanks so much, Carrie, for seeing these for what they are, and for your sexy pun. :) David
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Sure, you're welcome. :) Carrie
Comment from Adri7enne
LOL! How great it is to invent an alter ego to take all the crap, while you detach from it! It's a fine idea.
Your rogue is in great form today. He seems to think he can take on all comers, literally. LOL! Quite the guy!
The pie in the picture looks positively delicious. I enjoyed the read, "he's the cat to scratch your itch." LOL!
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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LOL! How great it is to invent an alter ego to take all the crap, while you detach from it! It's a fine idea.
Your rogue is in great form today. He seems to think he can take on all comers, literally. LOL! Quite the guy!
The pie in the picture looks positively delicious. I enjoyed the read, "he's the cat to scratch your itch." LOL!
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thanks so much, Adrienne. It's been a lot of fun, and the ladies issuing the ripostes now are the ones who are truly in on the joke, rather than getting bent out of shape because it dredges up old memories of their own encounters with the real rogues. I appreciate you taking a look.
Comment from barleygirl
Not following this closely, but I have caught at least one other of yours, plus quite a few of the ladies' poems . . . sorry buddy, you're so utterly outclassed . . . despite your admirable efforts. What makes the ladies' versions more clever is their penchant for subtlety which delivers the same (or better) sexual punch. It's the age-old inequity that we women don't wear it all, wagging & blatant, on the outside. With that said, some of your best phrases: "plow your land" . . . "blame, rename and game him" (they DO do this!) . . . and "never neglectful of a curve"!!! Thanks for continuing the fun!
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Not following this closely, but I have caught at least one other of yours, plus quite a few of the ladies' poems . . . sorry buddy, you're so utterly outclassed . . . despite your admirable efforts. What makes the ladies' versions more clever is their penchant for subtlety which delivers the same (or better) sexual punch. It's the age-old inequity that we women don't wear it all, wagging & blatant, on the outside. With that said, some of your best phrases: "plow your land" . . . "blame, rename and game him" (they DO do this!) . . . and "never neglectful of a curve"!!! Thanks for continuing the fun!
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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I disagree vehemently, but you're no different than all the other ladies, and since you haven't been following, do you even realize that they use lines from my previous poems to build theirs? Mine are a mix of blatant and subtle.
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*smile* . . . you must realize I'm just jealous becuz I don't have the skill to join in!
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I never know in this place, especially based on some of the messages and comments I get, but many of their ripostes are built by addressing my earlier poems. Not all, but many. If you've only seen one or two of mine, you probably missed some of the subtle ones. I base the 'tone' on either my mood or the tone of the previous ripostes.
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It's all brilliant, clever, amazing, & fun writing, on all of your parts *smile*
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Yes, but my part sticks out more. ;) Thanks.
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*laughing!*
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:)
Comment from trimple
LOTFLMFAO!
This is bloody fantastic LOL
I must try this iambic heptameter, the hippity hop rhythm is perfect for your piece. Your alter ego is rich in character and knows well his place amongst the harlots. You take us back in time perhaps to the old streets of London, where William Hogarth may well have written about your roguish ways:) I wrote a freestyle poem about him entitled thoughts of William Hogarth a while back. I'm sure I saw you there:)
Another smasher.
kind regards
trimple:)
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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LOTFLMFAO!
This is bloody fantastic LOL
I must try this iambic heptameter, the hippity hop rhythm is perfect for your piece. Your alter ego is rich in character and knows well his place amongst the harlots. You take us back in time perhaps to the old streets of London, where William Hogarth may well have written about your roguish ways:) I wrote a freestyle poem about him entitled thoughts of William Hogarth a while back. I'm sure I saw you there:)
Another smasher.
kind regards
trimple:)
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thank you so much, my friend, and I do believe I remember that verse. I also like how you liken it to the old streets of London, because I do try to mix the tone to be modern AND the slightly archaic tone of Lord Byron, The Libertine, and Casanova. Love your review, Tracey! :)
Comment from Kenneth Schaal
LMAO. I keep saying it can't get any better--but it does. There's no one line to fame, or blame here; they're all brilliant. They must know by now who the teacher is. I've yet to read an adequate rebuttal. Happy hunting. Kenny
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reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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LMAO. I keep saying it can't get any better--but it does. There's no one line to fame, or blame here; they're all brilliant. They must know by now who the teacher is. I've yet to read an adequate rebuttal. Happy hunting. Kenny
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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You're very kind, Kenny. Thanks so much, my friend. It seems there's a divide between the sexes, as every riposte has female reviewers who seem to think that each one has put the rogue in his place, while I insist that he keeps finding his way back to the same place...atop them. ;) Thank you!
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--over the years, I've heard every song they've got to sing--and more than once. My favorite is 'Nobody Will Ever Love You Like I Do.'
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So true, my brother. Thanks for your support. :)
Comment from 24chas
One of your betta Rogue pieces, Marillion. Therefore you deserve a six on it. The wit and the pure artistry of your naughty words justify this. Prepare for the onslaught.
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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One of your betta Rogue pieces, Marillion. Therefore you deserve a six on it. The wit and the pure artistry of your naughty words justify this. Prepare for the onslaught.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thanks so much, Chas, for the sixer, and for the warning. I appreciate one, and welcome the other.