The Heart of Poetry
Viewing comments for Chapter 68 "Rivers Roll"'Tis not the Bard, but pretty good poetry anyway
29 total reviews
Comment from Sagnik Das
Immensely witty, dear Carolyn -- with brilliant astuteness & a double-meaning (comparing life to a tumultuous river which, unlike the former, rarely inundates, despite the advent of turbulent atrocity).
Though by no means an expert in Japanese poetic forms, (especially the shorter ones), I do possess an intuition, & that impels me to adjudge this poem as being exemplary in every aspect.
It not only encompases your versatility as a writer, but imparts the reader a fascinating glance into the world of a profoundly prodigious personality -- (& hah! mark the inadvertent alliteration latent therein!) LOL.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
  |
Immensely witty, dear Carolyn -- with brilliant astuteness & a double-meaning (comparing life to a tumultuous river which, unlike the former, rarely inundates, despite the advent of turbulent atrocity).
Though by no means an expert in Japanese poetic forms, (especially the shorter ones), I do possess an intuition, & that impels me to adjudge this poem as being exemplary in every aspect.
It not only encompases your versatility as a writer, but imparts the reader a fascinating glance into the world of a profoundly prodigious personality -- (& hah! mark the inadvertent alliteration latent therein!) LOL.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
-
Hi there Sagnik, so glad you enjoyed Rivers Roll. Larry and I ate our lunch, right there on the sandy bank, where I took this picture. So glad you found it to be enjoyable read. Love you and all your family, :-) Carolyn
-
Indeed, what a charming vicinity, my friend! you are blessed to reside in a place as beauteous as Missouri, whereupon nature seems to have bestowed her choicest endowments... The sky, the landscape, the view -- oh! I can go on for hours, yet fail doing the slightest justice to that Romantic enchantment...
Pray convey my wholehearted regards to Larry.
:)
-
Hi back from Larry, it is 2 degrees here today so we are not so sure we are lucky. LOL
Comment from Tomes Johnston
This is an interesting poem from the author in this piece of writing. This is also an interesting concept of a river rolling without falling out of its bed. Sometimes they overflow and break their banks though. Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
|
This is an interesting poem from the author in this piece of writing. This is also an interesting concept of a river rolling without falling out of its bed. Sometimes they overflow and break their banks though. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
-
Yep, even rivers can 'break the bank'. Thanks Tomes for the comments and rating... :-) Carolyn
-
My pleasure
Comment from jyotijaink
Haha, loved the way the rolling in bed was described. Made me feel that the river was like a kid rolling in bed, yet kids do fall at times, but here the river stays in bed...maybe it's a kid at heart but sensible like an adult to take care it won't fall off.
A quick cliche, kept short so that it stays in the mind for long. :)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
 |
Haha, loved the way the rolling in bed was described. Made me feel that the river was like a kid rolling in bed, yet kids do fall at times, but here the river stays in bed...maybe it's a kid at heart but sensible like an adult to take care it won't fall off.
A quick cliche, kept short so that it stays in the mind for long. :)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
-
Thank you for this wonderful review. You seemed to really like the poem but rated it so low. Do you have suggestions for improvement. Was the syllable count off for a Lune? 5-3-5 . Have a great day, :-) Carolyn
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, notesandmore, you did an excellent job writing this lune poem about the river that never jumps out of its banks, i enjoyed reading it, cute play on words, good luck in the contest
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
|
this is very well written, notesandmore, you did an excellent job writing this lune poem about the river that never jumps out of its banks, i enjoyed reading it, cute play on words, good luck in the contest
Comment Written 28-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
-
Thanks for this super review and rating, glad you liked Rivers Roll :-) Carolyn
Comment from MM lives on :)
Restless river rolls
yet seldom
falls out of the bed ...ahhh I know this area well my friend...I was just in St. Charles, MO on the trail for 5 miles Sunday and loved it. great poem!
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
|
Restless river rolls
yet seldom
falls out of the bed ...ahhh I know this area well my friend...I was just in St. Charles, MO on the trail for 5 miles Sunday and loved it. great poem!
Comment Written 28-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
-
Hi there Christopher, do you mean Katy trail? It's been a while but we still bike occasionally. Thanks for the review, good to hear from you, :-) Carolyn
-
yes exactly!
Comment from 4hisglory
That is a beautiful picture of the river. Nice poem with the right syllable count and good play on words. I probably would say it 'never' falls out of the bed.
Blessings in the contest! LaVonne
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
|
That is a beautiful picture of the river. Nice poem with the right syllable count and good play on words. I probably would say it 'never' falls out of the bed.
Blessings in the contest! LaVonne
Comment Written 28-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
-
I actually had that word then thought, well it occasionally floods out of it's banks, so consequently out of it's bed. I have rolled out a couple of times in my lifetime. LOL Thanks LaVonne, :-) Carolyn
-
In that sense, maybe you are right!
Comment from Irish Rain
I love the sheer cleverness of this Lune! An excellent entry for this contest! Best of luck to you, and thank you for sharing, blessings tonight!
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
|
I love the sheer cleverness of this Lune! An excellent entry for this contest! Best of luck to you, and thank you for sharing, blessings tonight!
Comment Written 28-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2014
-
Thanks justjo, I am glad you liked this one, it was fun to write. Thanks for the good luck too. :-) Carolyn
Comment from Cajungirl
Perfect Lune, the syllable and line count are correct. What a wonderful poem. That restless river reminds me of my last nights sleep, nearly rolling out of my BED. LOL
What a humorous entry. The picture is beautiful. Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
|
Perfect Lune, the syllable and line count are correct. What a wonderful poem. That restless river reminds me of my last nights sleep, nearly rolling out of my BED. LOL
What a humorous entry. The picture is beautiful. Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
-
I am thankful for the Tempur-pedic we have or I would probably tumble out often. Glad you got a chuckle out of this one,
:-) Carolyn
-
Carolyn, I'll have to get me a Tempur-pedic. our Beauty Rest, leaves me feeling less than beautiful.
-
smile..
Comment from GracieAnn
notes, this Lune Poetry Contest entry fulfills the requirements of the contest and much more. The humorous ending is a wonderful play-on-word on the river bed that is nothing like ours! Well done! All the best in the contest! :0 GracieAnn
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
|
notes, this Lune Poetry Contest entry fulfills the requirements of the contest and much more. The humorous ending is a wonderful play-on-word on the river bed that is nothing like ours! Well done! All the best in the contest! :0 GracieAnn
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
-
Thanks GracieAnn, so glad you enjoyed this one... yes, it is a different kind of bed to be sure. :-) Carolyn