The Encounter
A flash fiction story...19 total reviews
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
Eagles are so beautiful. They also have much strength when they are on the ground or if they are flying. They can lift a little puppy right off the earth; thankfully the puppy was chained to a dog house.
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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Eagles are so beautiful. They also have much strength when they are on the ground or if they are flying. They can lift a little puppy right off the earth; thankfully the puppy was chained to a dog house.
Comment Written 09-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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haha! that's funny, but not funny! they get a bad rap for stealing animals twice their size and even have picked up a child i once heard! Yikes! I cannot help but love them though. they are so majestic soaring through the air! thanks for reading and leaving your awesome feedback! xoxo
Comment from Pam (respa)
-I love the image
and eagles, too.
-I appreciate your note!
-I like your story, and how
you take on the role of the eagle.
-The imagery is very good as you do:
"I soar towards billowy clouds."
-I like the ending, too!
-Good luck in the contest, Diana,
it is a good entry.
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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-I love the image
and eagles, too.
-I appreciate your note!
-I like your story, and how
you take on the role of the eagle.
-The imagery is very good as you do:
"I soar towards billowy clouds."
-I like the ending, too!
-Good luck in the contest, Diana,
it is a good entry.
Comment Written 09-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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Thanks so much, Pam! it is my first try at flash fiction. I have always loved to write, but thought myself only a poet. I am learning so much more about myself since I joined this site! appreciate your supportive feedback! xoxo
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You are very welcome, Diana, and kudos to you for trying something new. FS has a way of bringing it out if you let it!
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It sure does! :) xoxo
Comment from Alex Rosel
Ha, ha. This provides a great read, and it all hinges on the last sentence. That's nicely constructed {smiles}.
I particularly like the use of the strong verb "nestled".
"Aloft in the briny atmosphere of the ocean." -- This doesn't quite work for me. I know what you mean, but referencing "briny" and " of the ocean" is a repetition of sorts.
Good luck with the competition {smiles}.
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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Ha, ha. This provides a great read, and it all hinges on the last sentence. That's nicely constructed {smiles}.
I particularly like the use of the strong verb "nestled".
"Aloft in the briny atmosphere of the ocean." -- This doesn't quite work for me. I know what you mean, but referencing "briny" and " of the ocean" is a repetition of sorts.
Good luck with the competition {smiles}.
Comment Written 09-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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thanks for stopping to read. I used briny for the air to imply the saltiness of the air over the ocean. I'll look this over tonight and see if I can use another word. :) appreciate your support! xoxo
Comment from JudyE
This is well-written and a worthy entry for the 80 word flash fiction contest.
I might have put a period after 'dawn' and made the following two sentences.
Then to my great surprise, he turns and asks, "I'm free until dawn, would you like to go for a fly?"
Good luck
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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This is well-written and a worthy entry for the 80 word flash fiction contest.
I might have put a period after 'dawn' and made the following two sentences.
Then to my great surprise, he turns and asks, "I'm free until dawn, would you like to go for a fly?"
Good luck
Comment Written 09-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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Thanks for the suggestion. I did change to have the period there! appreciate the suggestion! xoxo
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
You brought these eagles to life with your animation and I expect they do have this communication, but we don't understand it, your write is endearing and cute and I enjoyed the read, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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You brought these eagles to life with your animation and I expect they do have this communication, but we don't understand it, your write is endearing and cute and I enjoyed the read, love Dolly x
Comment Written 09-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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thank you so much! it was fun to write and my first flash fiction! :)
xoxo
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Beautiful picture and lovely flash story. I like how you turn the serious tone into a playful charade: "A male sits next to me - says he's a family man whose wife is nestled down with eaglets. Then to my great surprise, he turns and asks, "I'm free until dawn, would you like to go for a fly?"
Good luck with the contest:) and thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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Beautiful picture and lovely flash story. I like how you turn the serious tone into a playful charade: "A male sits next to me - says he's a family man whose wife is nestled down with eaglets. Then to my great surprise, he turns and asks, "I'm free until dawn, would you like to go for a fly?"
Good luck with the contest:) and thank you for sharing
Comment Written 09-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2019
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thanks for reading and leaving me such an encouraging review. this is my first try at flash fiction! xoxo
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I know its hard to focus and have everything under the spell of exact word count, but you manage to do it admirably.
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thanks much! it is quite the challenge! xoxo but i love challenges!
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thank you so much! xoxo
Comment from lyenochka
Interesting fact about eagle behavior which isn't true to real eagles according to your notes. I had a couple of questions. It begins with the narrator eagle flying. How is the eagle being lifted? "The majestic bird soaring over the seashore, lifts me."
Also, this sentence wasn't quite clear to me:
"he shares, whose wife is nestled down with eaglets"
The "whose" should be next to the noun/pronoun it serves as a relative clause.
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2019
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Interesting fact about eagle behavior which isn't true to real eagles according to your notes. I had a couple of questions. It begins with the narrator eagle flying. How is the eagle being lifted? "The majestic bird soaring over the seashore, lifts me."
Also, this sentence wasn't quite clear to me:
"he shares, whose wife is nestled down with eaglets"
The "whose" should be next to the noun/pronoun it serves as a relative clause.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2019
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It is I who sees the eagle and I am lifted becoming an eagle! Maybe I should change I am to I become! He shares is just stating that he is speaking to me and would be next to man if that were taken out! Thanks for helping me to think about this a little further xoxo
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Ah, thanks for that explanation. That gives me a completely different feel as now the narrator is a human having a deep connection with Nature through the eagle.
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I revamped a bit so it should read a little better now! xoxo
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Perfect! Your changes made it so much clearer and more engaging!
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Awesome, thank you so much! This is my first try at a flash fiction piece! xoxo
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Best wishes in the contest! I like flash fiction - the haiku of prose.
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Thanks so much!
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Disciplined, reasoned and rational family making and keeping appreciable sexual culture, commonly maintained by male eagles preferably; well said, well done.
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reply by the author on 08-Sep-2019
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Disciplined, reasoned and rational family making and keeping appreciable sexual culture, commonly maintained by male eagles preferably; well said, well done.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2019
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Thank you so much! The eagle is my favorite not only because of its beauty in flight, but also because of the family bond they adhere to! A rare breed indeed! xoxo
Comment from Robert Zimmerman
Hey Diana. I was aware that male swans were monogamous but I didn't know Eagles were the same. The picture is excellent and I like the story, particularly the last two sentences. Robert
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2019
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Hey Diana. I was aware that male swans were monogamous but I didn't know Eagles were the same. The picture is excellent and I like the story, particularly the last two sentences. Robert
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2019
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Thanks very much! Yes, eagles mate for life and are equally dedicated to caring for their offspring. Both male and female incubate the eggs and warm the eaglets once born. They take turns going for food. They also building the nest together. They are a rare breed for sure! xoxo
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You're welcome.