Sleepless Till Dawn
ABC Poem21 total reviews
Comment from catch22
Hi Anupam, this is a very clever and well done ABC poem about writing in the ambrosial hours. You've made great use of iambic meter and it is a sort of blank verse offering in ABC format. I love the "E" line. It uses very good punctuation choices. You've also made good use of long "I" assonance throughout, as well as numerous other poetic sound devices. A dreamy and ethereal write. Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Hi Anupam, this is a very clever and well done ABC poem about writing in the ambrosial hours. You've made great use of iambic meter and it is a sort of blank verse offering in ABC format. I love the "E" line. It uses very good punctuation choices. You've also made good use of long "I" assonance throughout, as well as numerous other poetic sound devices. A dreamy and ethereal write. Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Thanks for this insightful, Gail. So pleased to know you found it dreamy and fluid. You're the first one to have noticed it's a blank verse, so special thanks for it. :) I guess people generally don't expect iambic meter to exist in the ABC form. Thanks for the good luck wishes, too.
Regards,
Anupam
Comment from Ridley Williams
Hello, Anupam,
I appreciated your solid vision of a restless soul delving through old notes, while his mind is bombarded with rhythmic creativity.
The line, "Denied the light, they never die but hide" suggests these words never make it to the page but hover on the edge of consciousness.
Your closing lines leave a feeling of acceptance to this evening fugue..."Until there whispers meet the breaking dawn"...sweet!
I really enjoyed absorbing this piece, Anupam, and I wish you luck with your splendid entry.
Bill
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Hello, Anupam,
I appreciated your solid vision of a restless soul delving through old notes, while his mind is bombarded with rhythmic creativity.
The line, "Denied the light, they never die but hide" suggests these words never make it to the page but hover on the edge of consciousness.
Your closing lines leave a feeling of acceptance to this evening fugue..."Until there whispers meet the breaking dawn"...sweet!
I really enjoyed absorbing this piece, Anupam, and I wish you luck with your splendid entry.
Bill
Comment Written 26-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Hi Bill,
Thanks for this lovely review and the generous sixth star. I always enjoy reading your thoughts, as they always resonate with mine. You are always able to look through my intent with words. Glad to know you enjoyed this piece, my friend.
Regards,
Anupam
Comment from judiverse
Excellent idea for an ABC Poem, and best of luck in the contest. You speak to lots of people who have insomnia. Might as well make use of it by letting your imagination go and coming up with creative ideas. Your word choices are lovely and really convey the feeling that sleeplessness brings. I'm to have a sleep study done in September. That should be interesting. It has more to do with an eye-related problem (floppy eye syndrome) but I occasionally have times when I wake up and then can't get back to sleep. I can understand sleepless nights once in a while, but too many of them demand attention to see what the problem is. judi
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Excellent idea for an ABC Poem, and best of luck in the contest. You speak to lots of people who have insomnia. Might as well make use of it by letting your imagination go and coming up with creative ideas. Your word choices are lovely and really convey the feeling that sleeplessness brings. I'm to have a sleep study done in September. That should be interesting. It has more to do with an eye-related problem (floppy eye syndrome) but I occasionally have times when I wake up and then can't get back to sleep. I can understand sleepless nights once in a while, but too many of them demand attention to see what the problem is. judi
Comment Written 26-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts, Judi! So pleased you enjoyed this poem. Sometimes, it does happen that I can't sleep as I need to write down my thoughts first.
Yes, many sleepless nights are a thing of concern. I don't know about floppy eye syndrome but I hope there is nothing too serious to worry about. Sleep study will definitely help in it.
Regards,
Anupam
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You're welcome. At least you are able to get your thoughts down first. Sometimes I have ideas, but they often disappear by morning. Sleep Study is in late September. I don't know much about Floppy Eye Syndrome, but I've seen that a sleep study is recommended for those cases. judi
Comment from JudyS
Anupam, Another wonderful poem. And an excellent entry for the contest. I can certainly relate to sleepless nights. I've had my share. Well done and best of luck. Judy
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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Anupam, Another wonderful poem. And an excellent entry for the contest. I can certainly relate to sleepless nights. I've had my share. Well done and best of luck. Judy
Comment Written 25-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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Thanks for reading and the gift of glowing stars, Judy. I guess all of us have been through that phase. I'm pleased you could relate to this. Thanks for the good luck wishes, too.
Regards,
Anupam
Comment from Jackarrie
Hi, I have not heard from you for a while.
Your ABC poem is well written with well chosen words to describe how a writer feels.
Creating dreams with beats of nascent words.
I enjoyed reading it, I wish you the best of luck in the
contest. Mary
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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Hi, I have not heard from you for a while.
Your ABC poem is well written with well chosen words to describe how a writer feels.
Creating dreams with beats of nascent words.
I enjoyed reading it, I wish you the best of luck in the
contest. Mary
Comment Written 25-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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Thanks for reading and reviewing, Mary. Glad you enjoyed this. Thanks for your warm wishes.
Comment from Sasha
I am sure I am just repeating myself, but I usually do not like ABC or Alphabet poems, they too often come across as forced. But this one does not. It is an eloquent and expressive ABC poem of top quality. I am also impressed with the artistic presentation of his one, excellent illustration to go with it too. This is a terrific entry for this contest and I sincerely wish you all the best in the contest. As you well know, I am the last person on this site to point out spags since I cannot even find my own, so I will let those that know what they are doing help you should you need any.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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I am sure I am just repeating myself, but I usually do not like ABC or Alphabet poems, they too often come across as forced. But this one does not. It is an eloquent and expressive ABC poem of top quality. I am also impressed with the artistic presentation of his one, excellent illustration to go with it too. This is a terrific entry for this contest and I sincerely wish you all the best in the contest. As you well know, I am the last person on this site to point out spags since I cannot even find my own, so I will let those that know what they are doing help you should you need any.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts, Sasha! I always appreciate your comments. I guess none of us can find flaws in our own work until someone points it out hehe! I appreciate your support.
I don't like ABC poems either, but just write them for contest, as there is no entry free. Thanks for all the positive comments. Enjoy the day!
Regards,
Anupam
Comment from sgalletti
I totally get this, Anupam. Can't tell you how many sleepless nights I've had where something starts gelling in my mind and I can't turn it off. I get up and right the thoughts down so I can try to sleep and then they just keep rolling a long and I end up up and down. It's crazy. Anyway, great ABC poem. I respect any poet who can use juxtaposition well to allow the forced nature of this form to evolve into a lovely, flowing piece with great imagery and a strong message. You did that. Best of luck in the contest. Sue
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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I totally get this, Anupam. Can't tell you how many sleepless nights I've had where something starts gelling in my mind and I can't turn it off. I get up and right the thoughts down so I can try to sleep and then they just keep rolling a long and I end up up and down. It's crazy. Anyway, great ABC poem. I respect any poet who can use juxtaposition well to allow the forced nature of this form to evolve into a lovely, flowing piece with great imagery and a strong message. You did that. Best of luck in the contest. Sue
Comment Written 25-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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Thanks for this lovely review and sharing your thoughts, Sue! I'm pleased to know this one resonated with you. It happens many that times that words keep striking my mind, and I've to just pen them even when I'm too tired. I also find this form a bit odd, but just wanted to enter the contest. Glad you find the flow fine. Thanks for the good luck wishes. Enjoy the day!
Regards,
Anupam
Comment from Eric1
Hi The Death (wish you'd change your name lol), this is a really good entry for this particular competition, a wondrous poem of a light sleeper who rises to look through some past works, I wish you the best of luck in the contest my friend.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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Hi The Death (wish you'd change your name lol), this is a really good entry for this particular competition, a wondrous poem of a light sleeper who rises to look through some past works, I wish you the best of luck in the contest my friend.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts, Eric. I appreciate it a lot. Thanks for your warm wishes, too. Hope you're doing well.
Regards,
Anupam
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You are very welcome my friend.
Comment from rama devi
Bravo for an eloquent and intensely expressive ABC poem, dear Anupam. Love the fluid flow, especially line two..creating dreams with beats of nascent words. The EA assonance almost sounds like internal rhyme. Same for the assonance of I in line three. Great consonance of S sounds in the poem, too. I learned a new word---endue! I know imbue...but endue I did not! the tone and tenor of this is well presented by the color scheme and artwork choice for an impressive visual composition that complements the poem well. No nits...good punctuation choices to serve the poem's best dramatic read. Good luck in the contest!~
NAMASTE.
Warmly, rd
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reply by the author on 25-Aug-2015
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Bravo for an eloquent and intensely expressive ABC poem, dear Anupam. Love the fluid flow, especially line two..creating dreams with beats of nascent words. The EA assonance almost sounds like internal rhyme. Same for the assonance of I in line three. Great consonance of S sounds in the poem, too. I learned a new word---endue! I know imbue...but endue I did not! the tone and tenor of this is well presented by the color scheme and artwork choice for an impressive visual composition that complements the poem well. No nits...good punctuation choices to serve the poem's best dramatic read. Good luck in the contest!~
NAMASTE.
Warmly, rd
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2015
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Thanks for such a lovely,superb review, dear friend! I'm pleased to know you found the flow fluid. When I started writing, I was about to frame a Villanelle, but then my muse took a turn and I ended up writing this LOL! I'm not a fan of this form, still it was a good exercise. Hope it will help me have good flow while writing the Villanelle. Thanks for your warm wishes, too. :)
Regards,
Anupam
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:-)))))
Comment from Taffspride
An excellent entry for the contest my friend. I wonder how many of us go through the same thing when trying to create.
Organzing thoughts, fresh, or from sheaves of notes can be daunting. But this poem proves it can be done.
I wish you luck in th contest.
Iechyd da
Ann
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2015
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An excellent entry for the contest my friend. I wonder how many of us go through the same thing when trying to create.
Organzing thoughts, fresh, or from sheaves of notes can be daunting. But this poem proves it can be done.
I wish you luck in th contest.
Iechyd da
Ann
Comment Written 25-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2015
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Thanks for this lovely review and shining stars, dear Ann. So glad this one resonated with you. As you said, many of us go through the phase, so it's a bit easy to connect with these thoughts. Have a great day ahead!
Regards,
Anupam
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You are welcome dear friend. ☺