The Crypt of Hubbard Hayle:Part 3
A continuation of the saga of Danny & Timmy...41 total reviews
Comment from ravenblack
The dynamic of friendship between them, even though it is based on victim/victimiser does ring true. So far, this is shaping up to be one of your best. Just keep Dimwittey a harmless old lady and not a witch. And bursted- grammatically incorrect but it does not matter. It is part of your character's speech. Please, focus on this story. There is too long a wait between installments and I am eager to see where you are going with it.
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The dynamic of friendship between them, even though it is based on victim/victimiser does ring true. So far, this is shaping up to be one of your best. Just keep Dimwittey a harmless old lady and not a witch. And bursted- grammatically incorrect but it does not matter. It is part of your character's speech. Please, focus on this story. There is too long a wait between installments and I am eager to see where you are going with it.
Comment Written 21-May-2014
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, dean, you did an excellent job writing this chapter where two friends get into a fight with each other because of name calling and then after the true reason is revealed for the trip, there is a threatend butt whooping....
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this is very well written, dean, you did an excellent job writing this chapter where two friends get into a fight with each other because of name calling and then after the true reason is revealed for the trip, there is a threatend butt whooping....
Comment Written 21-May-2014
Comment from ProjectBluebook
You got to teach me how to add pictures on fan story. I can add pictures via Abiword, MY MASTER DOCUMENT. This is the best, I seen in a spell. This is perfecto. Words can't express how much I envy this post. I love them skulls & crossbones, jolly roger. This looks awesome! You had to spend lots of time perfecting this. I'm speechless. I lay down me cutlass and take a bow. You are the king of horror, I can surely testify. This is jaw dropping. I see--six corpses in a cemetery. Six ghosts appear. Count your doubloons, Dean. This is supernatural. A seven would be deemed appropriate. You know, I might bring it up if the forum. I say, they should invent the seven. Given by fan story as a reward for getting surplus sixes based every three months. A special medal will be given to the winner of each three month winner. What do you think? Super seven award. LOL! mind warping. wackydo, do loco.
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You got to teach me how to add pictures on fan story. I can add pictures via Abiword, MY MASTER DOCUMENT. This is the best, I seen in a spell. This is perfecto. Words can't express how much I envy this post. I love them skulls & crossbones, jolly roger. This looks awesome! You had to spend lots of time perfecting this. I'm speechless. I lay down me cutlass and take a bow. You are the king of horror, I can surely testify. This is jaw dropping. I see--six corpses in a cemetery. Six ghosts appear. Count your doubloons, Dean. This is supernatural. A seven would be deemed appropriate. You know, I might bring it up if the forum. I say, they should invent the seven. Given by fan story as a reward for getting surplus sixes based every three months. A special medal will be given to the winner of each three month winner. What do you think? Super seven award. LOL! mind warping. wackydo, do loco.
Comment Written 21-May-2014
Comment from marijmd
through me like the Hershey squirts. - oh Yucky
what are plain pockets?
A grizzly tale - your dark mind fascinates me.
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through me like the Hershey squirts. - oh Yucky
what are plain pockets?
A grizzly tale - your dark mind fascinates me.
Comment Written 20-May-2014
Comment from DALLAS01
Great combination of prose filled with believable dialogue, art work, an spooky imagery. The introduction of Irene Dimwitty, a great character, is an added perk.
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Great combination of prose filled with believable dialogue, art work, an spooky imagery. The introduction of Irene Dimwitty, a great character, is an added perk.
Comment Written 20-May-2014
Comment from Alan K Pease
Timmy and Danny may find their friendship better to tolerate differences for while since their fight. The old harridan, Harold's wife of earlier moments warns the boys to not to approach the crypt at night. The two boys are too set to carry this mission out. What will they take away? Accompanying them is more fear.
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Timmy and Danny may find their friendship better to tolerate differences for while since their fight. The old harridan, Harold's wife of earlier moments warns the boys to not to approach the crypt at night. The two boys are too set to carry this mission out. What will they take away? Accompanying them is more fear.
Comment Written 20-May-2014
Comment from lindalcreel
There is something to be said about the writer and the genre they choose. I write paranormal fantasy, but still consider myself a good christian, regardless if I write about Lucifer and his disciples. It's not like I follow them. Perhaps it's part of you alter ego coming out. LOL Great post,as usual.
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There is something to be said about the writer and the genre they choose. I write paranormal fantasy, but still consider myself a good christian, regardless if I write about Lucifer and his disciples. It's not like I follow them. Perhaps it's part of you alter ego coming out. LOL Great post,as usual.
Comment Written 20-May-2014
Comment from Writingfundimension
I love the entire encounter with Irene Dimwitty. Once again, Dean, you tease us through your building of horror - the continued reminder of Timmy's instability for one. Just a few areas for you to consider:
'Then he bursted (I'm thinking you meant busted out or burst?)
Danny, as God is my witness... this needs quotation marks.
Looking forward to the next edition of this intriguing horror story.
Warm regards, Bev
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I love the entire encounter with Irene Dimwitty. Once again, Dean, you tease us through your building of horror - the continued reminder of Timmy's instability for one. Just a few areas for you to consider:
'Then he bursted (I'm thinking you meant busted out or burst?)
Danny, as God is my witness... this needs quotation marks.
Looking forward to the next edition of this intriguing horror story.
Warm regards, Bev
Comment Written 20-May-2014
Comment from Tomes Johnston
This is yet another interesting addition to the story that the author has created with this piece of writing. This is creepy and I am glad that you have a big heart as well as being a fantastic horror writer.
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This is yet another interesting addition to the story that the author has created with this piece of writing. This is creepy and I am glad that you have a big heart as well as being a fantastic horror writer.
Comment Written 20-May-2014
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi Dean Kuch,
I think I commented on a previous chapter that Dan seems to not have the brains to pack sand into a gopher hole. His 'quest' could get them both into something far nastier than a little old lady wielding a walking stick.
Good story, you've built the tension, suggested a monster of some sort, and left it hanging to keep attention.
Nice work.
Patrick
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Hi Dean Kuch,
I think I commented on a previous chapter that Dan seems to not have the brains to pack sand into a gopher hole. His 'quest' could get them both into something far nastier than a little old lady wielding a walking stick.
Good story, you've built the tension, suggested a monster of some sort, and left it hanging to keep attention.
Nice work.
Patrick
Comment Written 20-May-2014