Reigniting Your Flame of Youth
Viewing comments for Prologue "Why I Decided to Share my Knowledge"Physical, and mental self-theropy.
21 total reviews
Comment from c_lucas
In old age we should be given the energy to practice what we learned along to path of getting there. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words.
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In old age we should be given the energy to practice what we learned along to path of getting there. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2010
Comment from missy98writer
knowledge,
your non-fiction piece is very well written. Excellent narrative sets off your piece. You prologue hooked this reader to want to check out more. I loved your photo collage especially the lighthouse. I'm a fan of lighthouses. Here are some examples of your engaging narrative:
I have always been interested in gaining knowledge. Now I'm not a know it all. But I have picked up some valuable information about life and how to make it an enjoyable experience. I have read, studied and practiced Eastern philosophies, including Buddhism and Yoga. I looked into different types of natural healing, such as acupressure and massage therapy. Recently I became interested in self-massage and gland stimulation. This, with healthy dieting, natural herb and vitamin supplements, and a bit of yoga meditation started me on my way to revitalizing my body, mind, and soul.
I look forward to reading you series. . .Melissa.
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knowledge,
your non-fiction piece is very well written. Excellent narrative sets off your piece. You prologue hooked this reader to want to check out more. I loved your photo collage especially the lighthouse. I'm a fan of lighthouses. Here are some examples of your engaging narrative:
I have always been interested in gaining knowledge. Now I'm not a know it all. But I have picked up some valuable information about life and how to make it an enjoyable experience. I have read, studied and practiced Eastern philosophies, including Buddhism and Yoga. I looked into different types of natural healing, such as acupressure and massage therapy. Recently I became interested in self-massage and gland stimulation. This, with healthy dieting, natural herb and vitamin supplements, and a bit of yoga meditation started me on my way to revitalizing my body, mind, and soul.
I look forward to reading you series. . .Melissa.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2010
Comment from Shirley McLain
I am very interested, tell me more. The Prologue kept my attention and held it to the end. As you can see from my first sentence, I want more. Good job
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I am very interested, tell me more. The Prologue kept my attention and held it to the end. As you can see from my first sentence, I want more. Good job
Comment Written 12-Jul-2010
Comment from Sacred Heart
Hello my friend, You sound like me. Hey I'll
take all the help I can get to stay happy and
healthy. I'm really looking forward to the next
chapter. You have really got my curiosity up as
to what your diet is etc. I presume it's probebly
organic and natural. Thanks for sharing!
Take care, Love Light Patty
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Hello my friend, You sound like me. Hey I'll
take all the help I can get to stay happy and
healthy. I'm really looking forward to the next
chapter. You have really got my curiosity up as
to what your diet is etc. I presume it's probebly
organic and natural. Thanks for sharing!
Take care, Love Light Patty
Comment Written 12-Jul-2010
Comment from DrJane
My dear friend, Knowledge: Your book sounds fascinating and this prologue definitely whets the reader's appetite for more. Artwork is a great match. Notes: I would suggest a possible rewrite for Paragraph 1: "Because I believe that this book will be of great worth to you if you follow its precepts, I would like to give you some background as to why I decided to write it. I am writing it because I have discovered ...."; Also, since all of your other paragraphs begin with "I . . .", perhaps you could begin them like this: Para. 2: "Gaining knowledge has always been interesting and important to me."; Para. 3: "Sharing my discoveries will, I believe, help you as much as it has helped me."; Line 5: split infinitive--reword: "I decided that I didn't want to watch myself slowly deteriorate until..." Para 4: "I have put together...; Hope some of this will be helpful to you.
Blessings,
Jane
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My dear friend, Knowledge: Your book sounds fascinating and this prologue definitely whets the reader's appetite for more. Artwork is a great match. Notes: I would suggest a possible rewrite for Paragraph 1: "Because I believe that this book will be of great worth to you if you follow its precepts, I would like to give you some background as to why I decided to write it. I am writing it because I have discovered ...."; Also, since all of your other paragraphs begin with "I . . .", perhaps you could begin them like this: Para. 2: "Gaining knowledge has always been interesting and important to me."; Para. 3: "Sharing my discoveries will, I believe, help you as much as it has helped me."; Line 5: split infinitive--reword: "I decided that I didn't want to watch myself slowly deteriorate until..." Para 4: "I have put together...; Hope some of this will be helpful to you.
Blessings,
Jane
Comment Written 12-Jul-2010
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I can't wait to read the rest.
I am writing it because I have found out that when (I have discovered that)
I remember that the day I turned sixty it became (unneeded that)
I decided that I didn't want to slowly (unneeded that)
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I can't wait to read the rest.
I am writing it because I have found out that when (I have discovered that)
I remember that the day I turned sixty it became (unneeded that)
I decided that I didn't want to slowly (unneeded that)
Comment Written 12-Jul-2010
Comment from MitchellScott
So far so good. While it's difficult to rate this prologue I am interested in reading the book as it comes together. I hope you will be posting soon.
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So far so good. While it's difficult to rate this prologue I am interested in reading the book as it comes together. I hope you will be posting soon.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2010
Comment from AprilShower
Hi knowledge,
It is good to keep the mind working at all ages. Maybe your valuable information is something that everyone picks up as they grow older. I think this is a good start for self improvement. However, as I read it, I keep thinking, this sounds like one of those advertisements for staying young. Some of them are well written, too. They pull you in and you expect to read something worthwhile, but they actually say nothing until the very end when they try to convince you to give them money for their great secret discovery. I'm not finding fault with what you are going to write, though. Maybe you actually have something important to say. So I'm wishing you good luck with your self-improvement book.
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Hi knowledge,
It is good to keep the mind working at all ages. Maybe your valuable information is something that everyone picks up as they grow older. I think this is a good start for self improvement. However, as I read it, I keep thinking, this sounds like one of those advertisements for staying young. Some of them are well written, too. They pull you in and you expect to read something worthwhile, but they actually say nothing until the very end when they try to convince you to give them money for their great secret discovery. I'm not finding fault with what you are going to write, though. Maybe you actually have something important to say. So I'm wishing you good luck with your self-improvement book.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2010
Comment from JW
Growing old is the pits. Man. When I read this line, the first thing I wanted to do was to jump up from my chair and yell Amen. I could not agree more.
You've chosen an interesting topic and I will be curious on where you go with it. With all of us old (well - at least older folks) around, I can see where this book might have great potential.
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Growing old is the pits. Man. When I read this line, the first thing I wanted to do was to jump up from my chair and yell Amen. I could not agree more.
You've chosen an interesting topic and I will be curious on where you go with it. With all of us old (well - at least older folks) around, I can see where this book might have great potential.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2010
Comment from fishcantswim
An interesting prologue.
It works well, drawing the reader in with just enough to bring them back for more without feeling cheated.
No errors noted.
Thanks for sharing and hope the rest of the book goes as well.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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An interesting prologue.
It works well, drawing the reader in with just enough to bring them back for more without feeling cheated.
No errors noted.
Thanks for sharing and hope the rest of the book goes as well.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2010